Amor em design
Attack of the Squishmallow Budget Brigade (CRKT, Kershaw, Fura Gear D2/Ti)
2020.10.18 12:50 Nermal_in_AbuDhabi Attack of the Squishmallow Budget Brigade (CRKT, Kershaw, Fura Gear D2/Ti)
"Five!" "Five Budget!" "Five Budget Fol-derrrrrrrs!" "Knife_swap! Home of the amazing 5 Budget Folders! Lots of fresh and so-slicey folders for just $109 total! Fill up on great gifts/co-worker loaner blades today!"
**** Today's Specials
(stampy n' visuals)
Catch and release re-bundle, no boxes, and all in fine giftable/loanble/beatable condition, most of 'em easily mistaken for A/B condition save for sharpenings (except the Ti guy, probably more of a C but still solid). Now featuring sharp edges from our awesome community sharpening sleuths, u/Witty_Username_81
, with a special appearance by sharpening n00blin, u/Nermal_in_Abudhabi
- CRKT Liong Mah Remedy // C+ (for an swell sharpening by Witty) - CRKT's IKBS Bearing system, Designed by the dude who made the Lanny. Seriously.
- Kershaw Volt 2 // B+ (for the scrumptious strop on factory edge by Patty) - Speedsafe Assist, Clean action, sweet grippy handle.
- CRKT Rogers Maven // C+ (for a sweet stone-hone by Witty) - Another great piece by a famous maker, done with solid CRKT fit and finish.
- Ruike Hussar // C+ (for a super scrape-n-shape by Witty) - Really amazing what you can get at these budget price points.
- Fura Gear D2/Titanium Framelock Clone // C (for a... passable job by the sharpening class clown, Nerms *whomp whomp*). Perfect for anodization practice, and built "'Phord' Tough."
Over $150 dollars if you bought all these new (per BHQ, Amazon, and GearBest)
, all yours for the low, low one-day price of $109
*! YOLO now, and you'll also get a Benchmade deep carry pocket clip designed for the 940/943 series and identical BM hole patterns (Bugout too, Nermal believes) for FREE (because apparently those bishes are charging for 'em now? Da'fuq).
SOLD SOLD SOLD
Thanks for looking, and enjoy your Sunday! Uno amore, Nermal
Offer valid for shipping only in the Continental United States, Paypal Goods and Services with NO F**KING WORDS IN THE COMMENTS BOX please and thank you. Shipping and handling is of course included in the price. Five Budget Folders offer only at participating locations, which in this case means only in this crazy place called knife_swap. Not to be combined with other offers or any overlap or in accordance with the zany rules over at that circus KnifeRaffle, because seriously, that last Specter raffle was bonkers...dirty looking at you, #13. Far more sane over here in 'Swapton. Limit one Five Budget Folder YOLO per visit. Please present this flyer to the Nermal, but don’t be surprised when he eats it, then hocks it up as a furball for you as receipt. Cash value 1/100th of one cent, which is pretty much the value of a "Seconds!" comment on the 'Swap. This is the ﬁne print, why are you still reading this? Really, this is getting silly, go cut some shit. Post inspired by Subway and the freaking greatest fast-food sammich promotion to happen to active knifebros who still need to feed themselves. No Squishmallows were harmed in the making of this post: my daughter would kill me. ©2020 Nermal_In_Abudhabi Productions.)
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2020.09.11 01:34 TheBrideOfSatan Baron of Shanks (Translated to portuguese!)
So, I've translated to brazilian portuguese the "Baron of Shanks" lore that's exclusive to the Grimoire Anthology Vol.2, and thus not available in some languages, to some friends and I thought that I should also post it here :)
Oi! Traduzi o Lore Barão dos Shanks, que é exclusivo do Grimório Vol. 2 e não está disponível em portugues, para uns amigos e achei que deveria postar aqui também!
Barão dos Shanks
Associações: Emperador Calus, Leviathan, Menagerie, Decaidos, Sekris, Sombra de Calus
É a véspera de nossa missão para acabar com a vida de Dominus Ghaul. As sombras estão prontas.
Mas meu Kell, Calus, sempre atento, demanda mais um relatório para posterioridade.
Essa é uma história que eu já contei a ele várias e várias vezes; ele chorou de rir escutando-a. Eu não compartilho de seu amor por ela, mas ele é meu Kell, então eu devo contá-la uma última vez.
Antes de eu ser uma Sombra de Calus, eu me chamava de Barão. De que? De nada na verdade.
Eu não sou especial dentre meu povo. Minha geração foi nascida do Redemoinho.
Nós somos, todos nós, avarentos. E avarentos aprendem muito rápido a mostrar força ou morrer. Mesmo falsa força é melhor do que nada.
Então eu era um Barão. De Shanks. Minha especialidade era e é no design e armamento dos Shanks.
Minha casa e eu fizemos nosso covil na borda do sistema. Nós tinhamos esperança de estar tão longe da guerra contra a humanidade quanto possível.
Aquilo nos achou, de qualquer forma. Ou, melhor, ELE achou.
O Santo, o Rei Violeta da última cidade humana. O mais feroz de todos chamados Titãs. Junto de suas 5 outras Luzes. Eles atacaram nosso assentamento na noite e arrasaram-no em questão de horas.
O Santo estava no que seu povo chamava de uma Cruzada. Ele caçava todos os Eliksni pelo sistema. E hoje, era a nossa vez.
No momento em que eu havia acordado, eu era um dos poucos restantes.
No momento que eu havia ativado o esquema de defesa escondido pelo nosso acampamento, eu era o único.
Eu assisti das sombras na minha pele furtiva enquanto meu exército de Shanks rasgou 5 luzes.
E quando, para minha surpresa, as Luzes se levantaram, eu coloquei meus shanks numa configuração interminável. Enquanto as Luzes estivessem de pé, meus Shanks não parariam de atirar. Os seus canhões de arco cantaram pela noite.
Eu era um avarento, mas eu construí meus Shanks bem.
Com isso, restou apenas o Santo. E de alguma forma, ele podia sentir meu cheiro. Ele sabia que algo ou alguém guiava os Shanks.
Ele me caçou, e eu corri até que chegássemos no meu último refúgio. Um bunker que construí como último recurso. Não pela primeira vez na minha vida, todo meu povo estava morto. Eu não tinha mais nada a perder.
Eu me certifiquei de esperar pelo furioso divisor ametista de seu capacete aparecer na distância antes de entrar no bunker. Eu queria que ele me seguisse, e ele o fez, junto de seu Shank. Por uma bateria de granadas e bombas de proximidade.
Ele finalmente me encurralou dentro do bunker, sua armadura reluzente amassada e enegrecida. O divisor no seu capacete brilhava um roxo raivoso, a Luz ao seu redor um Vácuo crepitante.
De perto, o Santo era uma coisa bizarra, sua graça desmentia seu tamanho. Arremessou-se para frente com a armadura de um Andarilho e a velocidade de um raio de Arco.
Até seus movimentos tinham movimentos.
Eu tropecei para trás, inclinando minha cabeça para evitar um golpe de seu fervente escudo de Vácuo. Eu podia ouvir meu próprio respirar quando o metal conjurado crepitou próximo a minha garganta e voltou para mais uma investida quando errou.
Eu me abaixei. Ele sabia que eu iria, e seu joelho encontrou minha face, abrindo o display no meu capacete e me mandando cambaleando para trás.
3 golpes no espaço de tempo que me levou para processar apenas 1. Minhas chances de acabar essa luta eram baixas.
Mas eu o tinha.
Quando tropecei para trás, sangrando dos diversos ferimentos abertos na minha face abaixo do capacete, eu digitei um comando no meu equipamento de cintura.
Uma barreira surgiu entre nós no momento em que a lâmina do escudo do Santo rachou contra o espaço bem na frente de meus olhos - e se recuperou com um estrondo retumbante. Eu pisquei e dei um passo para trás.
Ele parou, também, para observar seus arredores. Ele estava preso. A barreira o impedia de avançar, e o botão no meu cinto tinha fechado e trancado as portas atrás dele.
Eu sentei, exausto, Ether e sangue escorrendo de minha face abaixo do capacete.
Barulhos de tiro ressoavam na distância.
Nós nos encaramos através da luz das barreiras.
Nesses dias, eu falava apenas a linguagem do meu povo, mas eu havia uma vez roubado um Glossador da Casa do Julgamento, no caso de Diplomacia com nossos sucessores nascidos na Terra mostrar-se necessária.
Eu desejei ter tido a oportunidade de usá-lo antes da matança começar.
Eu falei mesmo assim.
(Essa é uma aproximação do que foi dito, recontada da memória e editada para claridade. O Glossador é imperfeito)
“Seus camaradas ainda estão de pé lutando. Eu não sabia que a Luz podia trazer-lhes de volta.” Eu havia ouvido rumores de outras casas. Eu não havia acreditado.
O escudo borbulhante do Santo dissolveu-se no ar.
Ele me olhou com os olhos inexpressivos de seu capacete.
“É o presente fundamental da Luz. Seu povo o teve antes. O que o Viajante presenteou a vocês?”
“Muitas coisas,” Eu menti. Eu não fazia idéia. Segredos perdidos no tempo, escondidos em meias verdades.
Ele parou um momento para pensar.
“O que você espera conseguir aqui?” Ele perguntou, após um momento.
“Eu tenho perguntas,” Respondi.
“O que você gostaria de saber?”
“A batalha das 6 frentes. Os cercos na passagem de Boyle. A quebra das Armas da Chuva. Vocês fizeram tanto.”
“Assim fui informado. Todos perguntam sobre esses dias.”
“O que eles perguntam?”
“Eles perguntam como o fiz.”
Eu ri. Me fez sangrar, e eu choraminguei. “Não era isso que eu ia perguntar.”
“O que você perguntaria?”
“Porque. Eu perguntaria Porque.”
A face inexpressiva de metal me encarava de cima.
“O que lhe deu o direito?” Eu disse.
“Se você visse o que seu povo fez com meu mundo, você saberia,” Ele respondeu.
“A Grande Máquina. Vocês comungam com ela?” Eu perguntei.
E isso, ele não respondeu. Realidade dobrou--se com um guincho estridente e seu escudo reapareceu em sua mão. Ele procurava uma forma de sair, escaneando os cantos da sala e o sistema de projeção de barreira.
“Seu Shank veio até aqui com você. Está escondido agora, mas eu o vi. Ele é a chave para sua Luz, não é mesmo? Tem explosivos o suficiente aqui abaixo de nós para rasgar um Andarilho em dois.”
“Tente,” ele disse, olhando para o telhado. “Mate nós dois. Você fará meu trabalho por mim. Meus amigos estarão a salvo.”
Ele parou. Ele não achou um meio de sair. Nós olhamos um para o outro através da barreira.
“O que você está esperando” Ele perguntou.
“Eu pensei a respeito, e conclui que não poderia fazê-lo, se tivesse escolha. Por medo? Indignação? Talvez ambos. Eu pensei que não tinha nada a perder. Eu estava errado.
“Você acha”, eu disse vagarosamente. “Que se eu permitisse você viver, a Grande Máquina iria nos abençoar novamente?”
O Santo não respondeu.
“Ele ama vocês, não ama?”
O barulho de tiros dos meus Shanks ecoaram vagamente lá fora.
Eu apertei um botão na minha cintura e a barreira veio abaixo. As portas destrancaram-se. Lá fora, meus Shanks pararam de atirar.
O Santo me encarou através de seu elmo amassado e enegrecido. Ele foi embora. Eu assumi que convenceu seus amigos a irem embora também.
Eu mantive um olho nele pelo vasto sistema de guerra cabal. Ele continuou a liderar muitas vitoriosas campanhas contra meu povo.
Nota de arquivo: Sekris, Barão dos Shanks, pereceu durante a tentativa de assassinato de Dominus Ghaul.
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2020.08.25 10:20 Onlinedisney disney store vicinanze
La dimensione è stata eccezionale anche con un diametro di 15. La pietra preziosa gemma oche vi ha ispirato la maggior parte le tormaline e quarzi paesaggio.Il sito offre molti servizi pratici come note sul prodotto e recensioni dei clienti, un motore di ricerca per parole chiave che consente di visualizzarei risultati in base alla pertinenza, il suggerimento di prodotti simili. Ilcommerciante ha preso il suo registro, aperto : Questa collana è stato consegnato in Orecchini Disney
vigore il 20 luglio 1877. Sono caduto per la piccola catenacinturino placcato oro Giovanni ricorda la moneta americana con il ritratto di John Kennedy. La mostra di smalti Bresse.
Per fortuna Net-a-porter ridotto em a 50-70% di sconto e sono riuscito a snag i due bracciali eroeying. Dopo un primopassaggio al forno e del raffreddamento della parte, diversi strati di smalto sono applicati acqua aggiunta. Se dovessi scegliere solo giocare credo craquerais per la bib necklace talismano, è bello, non importa il colore. Pin finemente lavorato e Orecchini Disney
pesanti catalogo disney store e argentocaratteristiche di un universo in pa. La prima memoria di un gioiello cheera il mio madri orologi, sembrava delizioso cinturino realizzato in argento, con design floreale. Ho deciso di seguire il mio cuore, ecco i gioielli e-shop ho selezionato Ghost Amore.
Pinfloral jadeite e diamante jadeite costumi disney store e diamanti. Sautoirs,orecchini, bracciali, catene o corde, biglietti disneyworld's qualcosa per tutti a un prezzo Disney Giocattolo
molto contenuto. Sotto la loro influenza e le grandi case di gioielleria seguire. Per me la cosa più entusiasmante di pietre sono le inclusioni, dendritio particolare formazione biologica rutilo in una gemma che mi dà sempre un sacco di idee. Vorrei annunciare il vincitore su tale articolo. Esposizione il cuore di Anna di Bretagna ChateauChateaubriant Place du Général de Gaulle 44110 Chateaubriant 14 Giugno al 28 Settembre 2014Exposition il cuore di Anna di BretagnaBretagna Museum 10 oltre gli alleati 35000 Rennes 30 Settembre al 30 Ottobre 2014Lieu conservazione reliquiario cuore Anna di Bretagna,numero di Inventario 886. www.regalodisney.com/articoli-per-la-casa/accessori-per-la-casa
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2020.08.16 02:41 Octopusandcrow I'm An Immigration Attorney and I've Seen Some Things
Want to know a secret? Attorneys are bad at keeping secrets. We like to talk a very big game about “client confidentiality” and the strict confines of the attorney-client privilege. But most counsel only invoke that when they’re afraid that opening their mouth will lead a client to start shopping malpractice attorneys.
No, the truth is that attorneys talk about their clients and their clients’ secrets all the time. Go to the bar nearest the courthouse and listen to the tables around you. Lawyers will be telling secrets and the bigger and better the secret is the more they want to tell. It’s a job that gives you access to secret info, who could resist?
Well it takes something special to shut you up, and those “special” stories stay buried for good reasons. I have my own stories like that and I’ve never told them until now. I’m a lawyer and I mostly work immigration. I work for myself and have a stable of clients. They’re mostly working-class, working-poor, formerly -rich-but-now-getting-divorced-so-poor people, the type of client that’s looking for a bargain on legal services. Most of what they have in common is that they like me. You get new business by clients referring clients and it helps to lay on the charm.
Immigration law is a complex, brutal, heartbreaking process and it always has been, and then you sprinkle a language barrier on top. It’s not easy work and you have to think on your feet. I have clients from over 50 countries and it takes awhile to pick up everything you need to know. The most important thing for an immigration attorney to know is that the world is a bigger, more complex place than you could ever appreciate. The minute you think you’ve figured it out is the minute you’re set to fail.
Which brings me to Paula. Paula is not her real name. Sorry about that. But she feels like a Paula, I can promise you that. Paula’s the type of client that makes an impression on attorneys. Office drone clothing on her 50-something year old frame means she’s gainfully employed and can afford lawyer bills. Bright red, almost orangey tan in the middle of Chicago winter means she has money to travel and pay lawyer bills. Giant diamond ring on her finger that she keeps glancing at means she’s in love and can afford a giant ring and lawyer bills. You get the idea. For an attorney always concerned about making rent, all of this means “paying client.”
I don’t view all of my clients as paychecks, far from it. In a different post I could tell you about some cases I really believed in. These are stories I tell myself when I get too down on the practice, but I won’t pretend that everyone fits into that category. So I do invest a lot of blood and sweat into some of my cases but it’s just not possible for all of them. I could tell right away that Paula was going to be a case that wouldn’t pull my heartstrings.
My suspicions were confirmed when she pulled out the iPhone and started cycling through pictures of a country I’m very familiar with in Sub-Saharan Africa. The pictures were all of Paula and her brand new super-handsome fiancé. I could tell you more about my conversation with Paula but I wouldn’t be sure I was telling you Paula’s story or a similar story I’ve heard from dozens of other clients. I’ll summarize: 1) There’s a woman who was divorced, financially comfortable and feeling a bit lonely 2) so she decided to see the world which meant 3) she ended up in this African country where 4) she met the man of her dreams. (This is the part where the woman’s eyes get a big misty.) 5) The woman and the man fall madly in love with each other until 6) the night before she leaves for home he 7) proposes to her which she accepts and 8) they can’t wait to see each other again so she comes to me to get the immigration papers rolling.
I used to try to warn my clients. That 9) the client always comes back in few years to say that 10) her husband has left her and filed for divorce and 11) is it possible he never really loved her and only did this for the immigration benefit? I’ve warned and warned and the clients don’t listen. They find another attorney to file their fiancé visa and the same horrible thing happens to them and I’m out a paycheck. So now I work with them and try not to think about it.
I do remember the point when I realized that this case was not like any of the other ones. Paula was leaning over the conference table to show me the photos, willing me to believe that this 52 year old frumpy Caucasian woman from the Midwest has a relationship with the tall, muscular 21 year old African Muslim and it’s all very real Her ample stomach pushed up against the table pressing her loose orange flower blouse against her skin. Under the blouse I saw a whisper of movement under the surface. I have a baby at home and I knew what I just saw, Paula was going to be more desperate than most. I decided to take the case, if I could immigrate the man to the U.S. then the odds of that baby growing up with either a father or child support would go way up.
I pushed Paula’s hand down so she’d stop showing me photos and said I needed some information to start her case. “There’s an advantage and a disadvantage to a K-1” I said to Paula. “The advantage is that the main element we need to prove is that you two are really in love which you clearly are.” Paula’s head started jerking up and down so fast it was almost comical. “The disadvantage is that you can’t definitively prove such a thing so we’ll need to throw as much circumstantial evidence at the government as we can. Do you have anything that would convince a total stranger that you were really in love?”
“Oh attorney” Paula said with a big sly grin spreading across her face, “I can prove to anyone how much I need that man.” Her tone was so ravenous and sexually charged I felt embarrassed for her. Paula pulled out hundreds of printed emails. I glanced through them to get a sense of what I was looking at and saw the same thing over and over. Emails from the man between two words and two sentences saying “I miss you” and “I love you” or “have you talked to the attorney yet about my immigration papers?” The emails from Paula stretched multiple pages expressing her desire to cover the man’s “rippling biceps,” “delicious chest” and “smooth, soft skin” with every part of her lips. And of course there were pictures. Why do these cases always have pictures? I’ll spare you my description of the pictures, but I’m betting it’s a bit more salacious than anything you’ve ever mailed into a government agency.
But Paula was missing something. Sure, she was missing a healthy skepticism about her fiancé but she was also missing some legal paperwork. “I don’t see the Final Judgment in Dissolution of Marriage, am I missing something?”
Paula looked confused for a second, “the marriage what?”
“It’s the paperwork the court puts together when a marriage terminates. Basically the legal proof that your last marriage is over and you’re legally eligible to get married again. The government won’t approve the K without it.”
Paula looked so disheartened for a second that I thought I put my foot in my mouth. I realized that she never actually told me she was divorced, I just assumed. But then she just looked confused like clients usually do while treading in unfamiliar legal waters. “I don’t remember seeing that on the internet. I think I have it at home.”
“it’s a fairly new policy for the government.” It wasn’t a new policy; I said that to spare her feelings. “But we have to have it or there’s no point in filing.”
“Ok attorney, I can’t….I can’t thank you enough.” She looked really upset. Upset clients with solvable problems are the best; it makes them that much happier when you come up with the solution in the end. If all works out it can get you a good online review so I decided to push my luck.
“I’ll be in your area this evening, why don’t I swing by your apartment and I’ll pick up the documents along with whatever else you think is important. I can have the paperwork ready to go tomorrow morning and we’ll get your man on his way.” Paula’s giant smile burst out and I reminded myself that this job is really easy sometimes.
It was around 9:30 PM that night when the Free Palestine meeting broke up. I have a membership in the local chapter because it’s important to put in face time with the Stateless. Palestinians don’t have a U.S. government recognized nationality so their cases are always a mess, a goddam lawyer-lucrative mess. Like I said, networking with all kinds is key in my position. I’m also a member of Israel Defense Supporters for the same reason. You’d think the dual memberships would be a problem but no one’s ever found out. I guess they don’t go to the same parties.
I got off the L and started the half mile walk to Paula’s house. Her neighborhood was one of the quiet middle class sections of Chicago that seemed to be disappearing quickly. The houses were all bungalows with small lawns covered in weeds and streetlights that produced only dim light. Neighborhoods like this always reminded me of a zoo’s attempt to recreate an animal’s natural habitat. You see people who wanted the nice house with the white picket fence but got something else instead. Sort of like a Martian’s attempt to recreate the suburbs in much smaller form.
I walked up the steps to Paula’s rundown little bungalow and almost tripped on the way up. I stepped in something sticky and gross that felt like it wanted to tear my shoe off. Every time something like that happens I consider swearing off client home visits. But I was already here so I walked up and rang the bell.
I didn’t hear anything, no bell ringing, no footsteps coming to answer the door, nothing. I glanced at the window but it looked dark inside. I thought that Paula might have gone to sleep but it didn’t seem likely. Paula had been amped up, excited and almost visibly amorous. She wouldn’t have skipped out on a meeting with her lawyer that would bring her man closer for anything. Thinking the doorbell might be broken, I reached up to knock on the door. I pulled back to give it a good bang to make sure she heard it. I swung my hand forward and connected with the door and then my hand just kept going.
I almost lost my footing again from the shift in weight. The door looked like wood but it wasn’t. It was soft and ripped apart like wet cardboard. I had punched a hole straight through to the other side where my fist disappeared into the pitch blackness. I knew one thing for sure, this wasn’t right.
Did I mention I work a bit of criminal law? It’s not my favorite work even though it tends to give you more of the “lawyer” stories that people expect to hear at parties. Most crim cases are pretty cut and dried –get-the-guilty-plea-settlement-with-the-least-time affairs, but it does have one big advantage. As a lawyer, being around criminals helps you spot when someone is trying to screw you with a bad check, or attempt to trick you into releasing information that you shouldn’t, or is a dangerous person that you should stay away from. Situations can look “criminal” from a distance even if you don’t understand why, and this situation looked pretty damn criminal to me.
As I pulled my hand back out, little pieces of the door crumbled down onto my sleeve. It wasn’t exactly like cardboard, more like soil that someone had glued together piece by piece. My fingers seemed to slightly stick together from some sort of residue on the door. Part of me wanted to turn around and run, pretend I never saw anything. But part of me really did want to find out what in the holy hell was going on here. My instincts still said there was something criminal going on here, but you don’t end up taking criminal cases in the first place unless you’re a little curious about the dark side of human behavior.
I tried pushing again against the door and felt the weight shift against my hand. Then I heard a slide of dirt running down the inside of the wall before the whole door collapsed into a big sandpile right in front of me. A big cloud of dust shot up from the pile along with a strangely sweet caramel-y aroma. The house was completely black through the dust so I pulled out my phone and turned on the flashlight. The first thing I saw was the flowers, flowers painted on the walls, flowers decorating the curtains, flower designs on the rugs and actual flowers all through the house. You would have thought it was a funeral parlor.
In case you’re wondering, it was going to be the fiancé behind the break-in and whatever weird crim thing was going on. We might not ever get the whole story or even half of it, but it was clear as day that the fiancé had made an investment in Paula and people like to see returns on investments. I thought about how impatient he seemed in his emails asking her to see the lawyer and realized he must have gotten fed up with waiting. He probably called a few of his countrymen on our side of the ocean and told them where defenseless middle aged woman lived in exchange for a percentage of the profits. If they can find a social security card and some old tax returns then they can run the immigration scam with a convincing actress even if the real Paula is dead.
I turned and walked down a hall from the front room toward what I assumed was the kitchen. As I walked, my flashlight crawled across more and more pictures of flowers. My feet kept sticking to the floor with each step but I was barely paying attention. Throughout the house nothing seemed to be ransacked and I didn’t see one piece of overturned furniture. It seemed very strange, the door made of dirt, the stickiness everywhere and the flowers, but that didn’t mean it wasn’t African visitors. Practice cases from Africa long enough and you’ll start hearing people say weirder and weirder things. When you ask how what they’re saying can be possible they almost always say back “it’s Africa.” Frustrating as hell to explain to them that a judge isn’t going to want to hear that. But the point is, with Africa cases I don’t really ask questions. You just try to process as much as you can understand.
I inched my way into the kitchen doorway and scanned the light around. Nothing weird here, other than the flowers of course. A usual fridge and table stood on one corner of the room and the rest of the room was dark. As I pulled the light around back toward me I spotted something I’d been looking for since I got in, a light switch. I flicked the switch and to my surprise the whole room flooded with light. I guess criminals are getting sloppier and sloppier, no one had cut the power. I turned to look around the room again when I heard a quick shuffle to my side only a foot away. My head turned quickly and there in the corner was Paula.
“Oh shit” I thought when I saw her face, “ she found out he doesn’t love her.” Paula looked terrible. Her skin seemed to have an ashen black look to it as if someone sucked all the blood out from her. She was breathing in slow controlled breaths and her eyes seemed glossy and far away. Her hair looked darker and she wasn’t wearing anything other than an old bathrobe.
Her eyes snapped toward me and then at the kitchen light as if she was processing all of this in slow motion. Her face stayed surprisingly blank but her eyes locked onto me with a malevolence clients usually save for judges.. This was bad but expected. Clients get their hearts broken and lash out at the attorney because we must have been “in on it.” I did what I always do in these situations. “Paula, I am going to hack and slash this man until he wishes he never met us.”
Paula blinked a few times in rapid succession and I could tell she was surprised by the words. “Hack…hack who?”
“Anyone who gets in your way Paula. I like to think I’m a nice guy. But nobody thinks that after they cross one of my clients. By the time they stop hurting there’s nothing left. Why don’t you have a seat and we’ll talk it out.”
Paula took a small unsure step and then made her way over to the kitchen table for a seat. I have a bit of a divorce practice too and I knew a broken hearted individual when I saw one. I don’t know how Paula found out that her fiancé wasn’t well intentioned but experience tells me that the time to lock in the billable hours was to get the representation agreement signed right away.
Paula sat down on the red floral chair while moving her ample belly back from the table. She started to look better immediately, I could see her cheeks turning crimson as she got angrier.
“I know it hurts Paula, I don’t want to have to make it hurt more. But you’ll find that when we get through this process you’ll feel better about yourself than you have in years.”
Paula slowly turned her head while talking to me. “You…..you know.”
“Of course” I said with what I hoped sounded like genuine warmth. “And I’m the person who can help you out here. I’ve done this a few times before you know.”
Paula’s mouth opened slightly with surprise. She seemed to be in shock from the bad news about her fiancé. “But how can you help me?”
“Be honest with me, do you want to hurt his guy or do you just want him gone?”
I saw a small smile cross her face, the first sign of happiness from Paula since that morning. “Both, first I want to hurt him and then gone.”
“Can we get something out of him?”
“Oh yes” Paula’s eyes got wide with an angry hungry look, “there’s a lot.”
“Here’s how we make him pay. You have some problems, I’ll admit. But we can fix them and we will. One, we need to get this guy over here. There’s no way for us to hurt him unless he’s right in front of us and squirming.” I’m not barred in any African courts and wouldn’t practice in them if I could. Everyone I know who’s tried ends up losing to a local lawyer that’s cousins with the judge. “Does he know that you know?”
Paula slowly shook her head “no” while keeping her eyes locked on mine.
“That’s good. We can proceed with the K to get him over here and make sure he can’t leave.”
“How” Paula mouthed the word slowly, I could see her relishing her chance for some payback.
“Weird things happen, you won’t believe how many clients I have that lose passports and his country’s consulate’s absolutely terrible at making appointments for replacements. That would give us time” This was a key moment. I wasn’t quite suggesting that Paula steal the fiancé’s visa and lose it in a river but she damn well could hear that message. I detected a small movement on Paula’s face as her upper lip curled to bare teeth. She was game alright.
“Then you let me do my thing, I’ll put him in a position for you to make him feel however you want.” In situations like this clients love the aggressive ‘we’re gonna fuck’em up’ type talk, they’re pissed and they want you to be pissed too. There’s any number of legal moves I could use to drain this guy of whatever money he might have.
I pointed down at Paula’s extended belly which seemed to shift again under her bathrobe. “Don’t forget, that’s our best weapon. We can bleed him dry.”
There were those bared teeth again. Paula pointed down at her stomach and said “This isn’t just for him. I need everyone I was with there right here with me right now.”
Yeesh, Paula really did go on a midlife trip and who knows how many young men went on that trip with her. If she wasn’t sure who the father was then that would complicate things. The fiancé might be able to get out of most of the hurt with a DNA test. But now was still the time for the aggressive talk. We’d have to shotgun the subpoenas to everyone and sort out the guilty later. “Give me some names, I’ll get every last one over here. You have resources we could get an LLC running and H1-B the assholes in, as many as you can afford.”
“You…..are a very good attorney” Paula stood up and began walking down the hall. “I think I can work with you.”
I started to follow Paula down the hall, “You have a fighter on your side.” I used to use that line in my newspaper advertising. I still kind of liked the way it sounds.
“You still need the proof of the last marriage ending right?” Paula’s face and features seemed to darken along with the reduced light in the hall. She started to move quicker too. In my experience, clients like it when there’s a plan of attack.
“I do” Paula gave me a co-conspirator’s grin.. I decided to try a joke. “If you’d only hired me for your last marriage then we really could have made him hurt!”
Paula kept walking into the almost totally dark hall. It must have been darker than I thought because her skin seemed turn to black in front of me. “Oh, that was not a problem.”
And just like that Paula was gone. Poof, like she disappeared in front of my eyes. For a second I thought that she had stepped into a dark corner of the hallway, but I could almost make out the far wall so I should be able to see a middle-aged woman who had just been right in front of me.
In a fluttery heap, I saw a flash of white fall in front of my face. The white was such a contrast that my hand shot forward and grabbed it. I felt soft cloth and realized it was Paula’s bathrobe. I started to move it forward to my face on instinct and felt the bottom slowly peeling off the sticky floor where one sleeve had landed. I moved my eyes up as I realize the robe had somehow fallen off the ceiling.
There, spread across the brown ceiling was a black shape. The shape started to rapidly lighten from black to the same shade of brown as the ceiling. It was big, whatever it was, and gave only the slightest hint of movement. Draping down from it was what looked like a cape with a hood. Like someone had hung a hooded cape off whatever this thing on the ceiling was My eyes focused on the “hood” of the cape for some reason when I saw part of it spread open in white. The white moved and opened and I heard a voice say in a mirth-like tone “ready to see the last one attorney?”
My eyes adjusted to the darkness and I realized the “hood” of the cape was Paula’s head which was still somehow talking to me. The “cape” part of it was the nude skin of her body which had been cast off by the creature on the ceiling like a costume it no longer needed. The skin had a hole around the stomach and I thought about seeing Paula’s bathrobe moving across her midsection. This creature had been inside of her and itching to claw out. No, this creature WAS Paula and the skin was just camouflage.
Never break. Never let them see you sweat. Never let them see your thoughts. The words I say into my bathroom mirror the morning of every big trial shot through my brain as the dangling head of Paula bobbed in front of me expecting an answer. “Let’s see what you did to the bastard and we’ll improve on it for the next one” I heard myself say like in a dream. My voice sounded mostly steady but there was a hint of tremble in it.
I saw the brown creature above me extend a leg, no, multiple legs as it shuffled to the side. It had at least a dozen legs and moved like a spider, it’s limbs flexing and stretching to move a smaller abdomen that trailed the Paula “cape.” One limb reached back down toward the floor and I pulled back thinking it was coming for me. The leg moved close enough to my face that I caught a whisper of prickly hairs on it scratching past my face. The leg shot back up and plowed into the brown ceiling sending a shower of dust onto my face. It was the same resin substance that had made the door. The leg jerked to the side like a finger pulling open the top of a can of beer and I heard a “pop.” More dirt and dust sprinkled down along with a solid object that landed at my feet. There, with an unmistakable Jerri-curl hairstyle, was a mummified black man’s head.
“Well attorney, do you like my work?” Paula’s dangling head suddenly moved upward and I heard a splashing sound around her mouth. On the ceiling I could make out some sort of sticky goo substance pouring out of Paula’s mouth and into the hole the head had come out of. Watching her I saw the hole start to fill in with more of the resin substance.
“Paula, I think I have a new favorite client.” I tended to say that line a lot too. Clients like thinking they’re my favorite for some reason. Paula liked it too as I heard her head roar back and start laughing her middle-aged woman laugh. The creature on the ceiling stayed deathly still as Paula’s face contorted back and forth with laughter. I turned and walked away like it was the most natural thing in the world.
Walking through the dark hall and toward the living room my eyes kept glancing up. More of the resin covered the ceiling throughout the house and I could see small bits and pieces through the dirt. A blue suede shoe with a dark ankle stuck out of one corner. A giant 1960’s style Afro was just visible through the dirt attached to a head that seemed to be mid-scream.
“I’ll call first thing in the morning” I said from her empty front doorframe. I could see something, a shadow of red and yellow and blue moving past the floral patterns spread throughout the room. The creature was like a chameleon, I couldn’t properly see it but I could sense it was in front of me.
“Leave a few cards please attorney” Paula’s voice could have been inches away but I couldn’t see her head. “I have some friends that I would love to recommend you too.”
“Think of how much you’ll recommend me after you see me work.” And I did my closer smile as I put the cards down on the front table. With that I turned and walked out the door.
This was three months ago and Paula’s case is still going. I never went to the police because breaking privilege would screw up any criminal conviction the DA could bring even if I got someone to believe me. The fiancé hasn’t crossed the pond yet and I don’t plan on making that happen. At the same time, I can’t exactly drop Paula as a client. She could complain to the Illinois bar, she could badmouth me to other clients and she would definitely stop paying. The great news is that every attorney knows how to grind their cases to a complete halt. The key is to do it in a way where the client doesn’t realize that’s what you’re doing. My hope is that the fiancé loses interest in coming over and Paula gives up hope without leaving me a bad rating on Avvo.
It’s not perfect, very far from it. But my job has a lot to it that’s less than perfect. But I wanted to write this to see what the part of my soul that’s still 100% honest looks like. But now that that’s done, I need to prep for my consult with Paula’s first client referral.
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2020.08.09 01:35 Gunnhildar Sirenia: A Nation Of Five Queens (Part 1)
The Fjeldorians believed that they were the descendants of giants and believed that Fieldor was their domain. The jarl of Jatteson possessed a stature that would leave no doubt in anyone’s mind that he and his people truly were children of such mythical beings. Jatteson was the southernmost kingdom in Fjeld. The jarl came from a lineage of seafaring war masters, but after decades of misfortune experienced by his great grandfather, his family’s rulership was cast along the mountainside and away from the treasures of the sea.
Fjeldor’s southern region had finally seen Spring. While most regions on Dai Pieros welcomed green pastures after the winter, Fjeldor remained frigid with scant snow showers. However, there was reprieve that day the trio of Sirenians arrived at the jarl’s village. This visit was an expected one. Months prior, the Queen of Megata had sent a message asking the jarl to allow her emissaries an audience with his majesty. She promised that the discussion could benefit both parties mutually.
A thinly braided lock of hair swayed by the jarl’s temple. Knotted at the end of the braid was a raven’s femur bone. The bone was attached there by the village’s mystic after he saw in his visions that only good can come from the meeting. Auspiciousness follows an agreement with a trio whose mother was born from the sea.
“My Jarl, the Sirenians have arrived.” One of the jarl’s men notified the jarl as he sat on his wooden throne.
Three Sirenians entered the long cabin. Nareen was sent to accompany the women because of her expertise in physical combat. The high priestess Gabrielle was a magi, able of using the arts what many in Dai Pieros have forgotten about. Emilia was the emissary, tasked to initiate an alliance, or at the very least get him interested by the prospect.
The Jarl nods towards the man who notified him, a thane of great trust. Barbaric as his people may seem to the cultures in more southern climates, his hall and all those within it understood basic manners. The Jarl stood up, his frame tall but thinner than most of the warriors in his hall. He made sure his long gilded locks were properly combed and braided for such an occasion, a streak of blonde down the timber wolf fur draped over his shoulders. His beard, reaching to the dip between the clavicles, was braided in a similar fashion, with bone jewelry adorning the end, runes carved within the ivory.
As he approached the three women, he gestured towards three of his personal huscarls, each one as massive as a grizzly, bringing forth fine furs of the cleanest hides. The three huscarls presented the furs to the women, none of them making eye contact, eyes facing towards the wooden tiling. The gifts seemed clearly designed to fight off the cold, despite the roaring fire sitting behind the ladies in the middle of the hall, the scent of roasting bison filling the room.
He stopped approaching a yard away from the women, arms stretched out, his head bowed in respect. When he looked up at the women, he made sure his fiery emerald eyes met with each of theirs, the pupils a similar shade to the linnorm scales that make up the chest piece he wore.
"I am Ein, Son of Gunnhildar, heir to the bloodline of Ulfgard Jatteson, first Jarl of the Great Meadhall of the Kingdom born from his name. I am the master of these halls, and as such, it is my duty and honour to present thee with warm food, stiff ale, and shelter from the hoarfrost. Now..."
His silence was quickly followed, as the patrons of the hall shushed each other, listening to what their lord had to say to the strangers from a strange land. He folded his hands over the pommel of his sword. The silver rings clicked against the golden ridges of the pommel, the sword belonging to the Jarl, and the Jarl before him, and every Jarl who claimed stake to the hall.
"...Queen Lana of Megata wishes for a...'discussion,' aye? Tell me, fair maidens, is this a matter that can be discussed here, or would it be more acceptable to take this matter elsewhere?"
Emilia was pleasantly surprised by the Jarl's warm welcome. She had never visited the north. The northernmost folk she had ever come in contact with were Calivians, who always had choice words to speak about the Fjeldorians. Emilia and her compatriots kindly received the furs. The women had to make an active effort not to replace their poorly insulating furs immediately. If it weren't for the spell Gabrielle had casted with her staff, the Sirenians would have surely arrived at the Jarl with frostbite.
"Jarl Ein, thank you for your generosity. I am Emilia, Duchess of Arms to the Fifth Queen of Sirenia. To my left is Nareen of Sirenia's third queendom, Aquita. She is the first of the Sirenian guards. To my right is Priestess Gabrielle, one of the highest priestesses in Megata." The Sirenians lowered their heads in respect as their name and rank was called by Emilia.
"I think this discussion would best be held in private, if that is alright with your majesty." Emilia spoke as the other two stood close behind her. The Queen's cousin felt curious eyes upon her which made her wonder if a Lung had ever made their way to this side of Dai Pieros before.
Ein's men lead the Jarl and his guests to a smaller hall which they used as a war room. The walls were lined with axes stained with the dried blood of those who they helped carry over to the afterlife. "Jarl Ein, as Queen Lana's message alluded, we need your help. The Calivians seem to have forgotten their duty to Sirenia." Emilia paused, fearing she might have started off sounding entitled. "There is a strip of land between Megata and Calivia that we call the high plains. It is the only land that will take crops. The High Plains have been traditionally regarded as Megata territory but shared by both my people and the Calivians, under an agreement that they provide farm hands and guards to the region. However, recently spates of theft and animal attacks in the region due to significant withdrawal of resources initiated by the newly crowned Calivian king" Emilia looked the Jarl in the eye as she spoke. Her almond shaped eyes had a soft, piercing quality to them.
Ein's gaze did not break from the Duchess, until she ended her explanation. Taking in the knowledge provided, he turned his back on the ladies, and looked at all the weapons on the wall. His smile was soft, but there was a hint of eagerness to it, and his green eyes seemed even more aflame, as the very fires of battle raged behind them. Without looking back at the women, he spoke with an odd sense of calm.
"...and I assume this means that the Queen of Megata needs more than my mere 'help.' She wants us to set an example of the Calivians and their new king, eh?" He walks up to one of the many axes on the wall. "...do your people know why the King is withdrawing resources? Personally, it sounds like mere greed, forcing his people to take what cannot be given..." He finds a particularly bloodied axe, with a long oak haft, and a wicked beard. The blade was razor thin, and the blood was almost brown and black with age.
"...now, we owe nothing to Sirenia. You already know this. So...if you desire my men to leave their families and homes behind them, and send them off to kill off Calivian weaklings, for a country they have no loyalty to...how does your Queen Lana..." He turns back to face the women. "...intend to pay us?" His smile rested on one side, ending in a smirk. It was clear by his expression, and the weapon in his hand, that he was eager to accept any offer they asked, if given the proper compensation.
Even though the Jarl wasn't as physically imposing as some of his larger huscarls, Emilia knew that a man of his stature could end her life in an instant if he truly wished for it. Despite this, she remained calm with an assured posture.
"Your highness, we don't exactly want there to be bloodshed in the High Plains, we are merely looking for protection." There was a half truth hidden somewhere in that statement. "Megata has always been underfunded by Sirenia's capital and our Queen's parent nation has been losing significant resources as the war wages on in the Lung region." She paused for effect. "However, Queen Lana is offering to waive all required dowries for Sirenian wives taken by you or your people. My queen wants to ensure Megata maintains a strong relationship with the people of Jatteson." Sirenian dowries have been notoriously high, even for royal men and women of means. "Furthermore, Queen Lana would like to offer your people a tenth of what is reaped from those crops." Emilia stared intensely at Ein with almost a hint of a smirk.
Emilia approached the Jarl slowly so as not to alarm Ein's guards. As she closed the space between them, Ein could verify with his nose that the rumors of how intoxicating Sirenian perfumes were not at all fictional. The crimson silk dudou underneath Emilia's fur was more visible than ever. It hugged her form tightly. The gold stitching portrayed a dragon wrapping its serpentine body around a phoenix. "We are open to negotiations but I do hope you find that to be an acceptable offer, your highness."
The smirk he carried remained, even as he looked down at the bloodied steel. The heft of the axe was comforting for any Fjeldorian to hold. "...Your Queen is quite the intelligent business woman. Great offerings, ones that only an idiot could refuse. Offerings by her best..." he inhales the sultry scent of the perfume, and sure enough, the scent played an important role in how confident and brave the Duchess was in making any man become quite amorous towards her. "...advertiser, who knows what political power over men she holds."
His eyes turn back up, meeting hers. He held her gaze, saying nothing for a few moments, the tension in the room becoming thicker than the cold air in their lungs. Despite the cold, that strange fire in his eyes burned ever brighter, like two green suns of pure ambition brought into being "...I shall accept this offer, BUT...only if I may ask one more favor from the Queen. One that, I am certain, she will want to refuse, or at least be ashamed of accepting if she does."
His pattern of moving his attention between the conversation at hand, and his admiration of the axe, was particularly odd, almost off putting. "Tell me, Duchess Emilia." He took a step closer towards her, axe still in hand. He did not care about how his guards or how Nareen responded to his advance. Their faces were less than a third of a meter away from each other, his eyes looking down at hers, his form a head taller than even Nareen. "Do you know how many men this axe has killed?" He holds up the blade, the steel extremely close to both of their faces. While the cold metal seemed polished from a distance, upon close inspection, the blade was covered in tiny etches, barely visible. They covered the blade from tip to tip, edge to haft. "When an axe kills a man in battle, we burn a minute tally into the metal. When there is no more room, we retire the axe. Swords do not get this treatment, as swords are to be passed down from father to son, serving a family forever, never to retire."
He moves cautiously around her, and sets the axe down on the table behind the Duchess, turning yet again away from her. He leans forward, hands on the table, looking down at the axe, and the map of the known world. He stared for a long time at the single point on the map that represented his village...then his eyes drifted towards Megata. "...One night. I will accept the call for aid from Megata, so long as Queen Lana gives me not just the gifts she offers...but one night with her. I do not wish it to be made public, for her own political standing, and I do not ask for her hand in marriage, as I recognize the consequences she would deal with. No...I want one night, with your Queen, in her chambers. There is to be no one around but guards outside the room. Whatever happens in her chambers remains there, but I want to experience just how far Queen Lana will go for her position and her people...send this request back to her, then send a pigeon. If she accepts, we ride south the next day." Looking back towards her, his smirk was visibly more smug than before. He knew he was pushing it, and seemed to get a kick out of it. "...tell me, Duchess. What do you think of this request?"
Emilia could almost smell the cold steel as the axe was held before her. Nareen and Gabrielle flinched forward in response to Ein's provocative gesture. The pair of Sirenians stopped short of any meaningful action as Ein explained the existence of the etchings on the axe. Emilia, like the Sirenian's behind her felt uneasy as the Jarl spoke proudly of murder. However, the emissary stood confident and unflinchingly. Emilia assumed the role of Duchess of Arms after her sister was murdered, vowing to Lana that she would honor the death by making Megata safe. She wasn't prepared to let a little intimidation get in the way of that. Emilia stared back at the Jarl with matching intensity, though the inherent softness in her eyes could not be concealed.
The Duchess couldn't help but to smirk as Jarl Ein made the proposition. It was not uncommon for a dignitary to try and covet a Sirenian Queen. At least the Jarl knew better than to ask for an arranged marriage, Emilia thought.
"You're correct, your highness. Queen Lana may very well refuse your favor. But it is my duty to relay this counteroffer to her." Emilia paused until she was sure that the Jarl was looking at her with his undivided attention once more. "You have been very hospitable thus far but It was an arduous trek up north for me and my fellow Sirenians. Would it be at all possible for us to seek refuge until the morning light?"
"Perhaps a meal to greet our guests properly?" Even though Arne was one of Ein's huscarls, he often felt safe to speak out of turn because he was the cousin to one of the Jarl's wives.
After a moment of somewhat awkward silence, the seconds of silence were broken by the laughter of the Jarl. "Yes, Arne. Ensure that the roasted hogs and the spiced meads are suitable to warm the bellies of all those in my hall, be they guests, family, warriors, servants, all but the slaves shall revel in celebration of this wonderful bond! I shall be out in a bit to grant the speech, but please ensure the members of the hall are celebrating! When I arrive, Arne, I better come to find half the hall drunk, two men with bloody noses, and one of those bloodied men fucking a slave, and if that hasn't happened when I return-" The Jarl wraps his arm around the shoulder of his cousin-in-law, playfully smacking his chest. "-your cousin Sigrun will never hear the end of it!" He hurries his huscarl along, then turns back to face the Duchess.
"...If I'm going to be honest with you, I do not expect her to accept my offer. If she does not, tell her that she has my respect, and I will humbly accept her offer, and do not intend to pressure her on the matter. Consider this, between you and I, a test for your Queen. A test to see if she is curious, desperate, or both." He picks the axe up from the table, and places it back on the wall. "...Leave..." In an odd display, his remaining huscarls, the very protectors of the Jarl...bow their heads, then leave the room, leaving only the Jarl and the Sirenians. The Jarl must be foolish to leave himself without guards in the presence of some of the most powerful women in Megata.
"...My men will direct you where to sit. Guests of strong political importance sit alongside the Jarl's left, you will see my men preparing your seats. In the meantime, the slaves will prepare your sleeping situations. You may choose any of my personal slaves, man or woman, to share your beds." As he faces the women, there is a sense of excitement on his expression. Even and idiot could tell that the Jarl was ecstatic about the chance to head south and do battle, bringing glory and riches home with him and his men. "...Skip the pigeon. I shall ride with you tomorrow myself, and express my agreement to her offer personally. Oh, and uh...if anybody attempts anything on you wonderful ladies, do let me know. As Jarl, I set the rules, and therefore must enforce them." With that, he leads the women to the exit of the War Room. "Now, if you would be so kind, I need a moment before I return to my meadhall."
Emilia smiled as the Jarl confided in her. She found it a bit odd he would trust her to keep the intention of his question shrouded from her own queen. Perhaps a test, she thought. The Duchess shrugged off any further plotting. It would be a matter for when they returned to Megata, anyway. Her mission was to capture the Jarl's interest. Bringing him back with her would surely exceed Lana's expectations. "Thank you, your highness. I'm glad we could come to a quick resolution and I will do my best to get you the answer you seek about my Queen's intentions."
Several long tables formed two parallel lines in the vast mead hall. The hearth at one end of the hall pulsed as its flames cooked the bodies of feral beasts. At the other end of the hall, perpendicular to the tables, sat Jatteson’s Sirenian guests. The women were seated to the left of the Jarl's chair. To the right were seated Ein's three wives.
"The dainty ladies of the south must be freezing. What do you think?" Sigrun spoke in the native Fjeldorian tongue. The other two wives giggled at the slight.
Even though the feast was impromptu, the people of Jatteson were always ready for the merriments that took place in the mead hall. It didn't take long for the hall to fill, the body heat and hearth felt like it could melt the largest of glaciers. It seemed like mead was flowing endlessly, tankards were replenished before they could ever be fully emptied. The Sirenians however, imbibed slowly. Waiting patiently for the Jarl to arrive.
"Have you ever seen anything like this?" Priestess Gabrielle whispered only to be given the same answer by both her compatriots. "You've clearly never been to Oceania, have you?"
Nearly an hour later, as the sun began to rest into twilight, the Jarl entered the hall, causing the entire hall to cheer upon his arrival. As he reached his end of the hall, he did not sit, but remained standing. One of his slaves gave him a horn of mead, and the hall went silent, knowing it was time for the Jarl's speech. The eyes that once held to flames of ambition seemed cooled, like a campfire left to burn until the morning.
"...People of Jatteson. Many of you knew my father, a warrior who reclaimed old territory and claimed new territory. He was a chieftain of great renown, and he slew the mighty Linnorm of the Crag, a beast that held off the arctic volcano that was once used as a forge of the Jatteson ancestors. He single handedly slew the beast, carving a new age for our people. He, like many of us hope for, died in battle against the creature, the venom of it's breath and the legendary Curses that are attuned to the Linnorms too much for even a man such as him. But, what he left with us was a gift that was stolen from us. With this gift, Jatteson has become stronger than before, with weapons and armors forged for the greatest Clan of the North!"
The crowd roared in cheers, a sign of glory for the Fjeldorians, who believed that the only form of immortality was through legends. The Jarl looked at his three wives. He looked first at Sigrun, the eldest of the wives, then at Thrima, the strongest of his wives, and finally at Hrist, the only one of his wives with shamanistic magic. His gaze soon turned back to the crowd, and with a raise of his hand, silence quickly returned.
"...Today, our people were granted another gift. This gift could not be achieved without the sacrifice my father made, and I shall be no different. Tomorrow, every man capable of wielding a weapon shall ride with me tomorrow, south, to the land of Megata. There, we shall find glory and gold, and those without wives shall wed with those of Sirenian blood. Our names shall be launched out from our homes, carving our deeds into the lands we travel, a carving formed from the spear of honour, the axe of legends, and the sword of war. We will remind the enemies of Megata why the people of the south once FEARED our kind! We shall slaughter the sheep, and remind them who the wolves of war are! In the name of the Allfather, and all the gods below him, we will not return home until their heads adorn our saddles, our bags are filled with their gold, and our beds are warmed by their women! WE SHALL DANCE TO THE DIRGE OF THEIR SCREAMS, AND OUR FAMILIES WILL SING OF OUR DEEDS UNTIL OUR FOREFATHERS DANCE TO OUR TALES!!! KYSSA MÉR, IAK EM INN EITR ORMR!!!"
The hall exploded with cheers yet again, this time, the crowd repeated the odd Fjeldorian phrase over and over again. "KYSSA MÉR, IAK EM INN EITR ORMR! KYSSA MÉR, IAK EM INN EITR ORMR! KYSSA MÉR, IAK EM INN EITR ORMR!"
When the Jarl finally sat down, the crowd returned to their merriment, but this time, the revel was even more intense than before, with skalds singing and playing instruments, and people dancing a wild display to the tune. The night was going to be long and loud, that much was certain.
A petite slave approached the Sirenian women, with a small cask of mead or ale in her hands. She spoke, but did not look at the women, staring just below their eyes, as if she wasn't allowed to make eye contact. "Would you care for some more drink, m'ladies?"
By the time the Jarl entered the mead hall, his expectations were exceeded. Nearly all of his men were drunk. Several men laid unconscious either from concussions or drunkenness. A few pairs of figures could be seen unabashedly copulating against the walls of the hall. The debauchery seemed to hit a crescendo just as Ein entered.
Emilia and her two compatriots smiled as the Jarl gave his speech, hoping to give a friendly face to their cause. But it seemed that the warriors of Jatteson did not need anything more than a command from their leader in order to be fully committed. As Ein’s people chanted, the ground seemed to quake. The three Sirenians felt their chest cavities reverberate, their hearts almost coaxed into beating to the rhythm of the cry. It was jarring how quickly the Jatteson people went back to their festivities.
“I hope you don’t intend on adding a fourth wife, husband. Our home is crowded as is.” Sigrun said with half jest in her voice.
Nareen allowed the petite slave to refill their drinks while Emilia turned to her host. “I appreciate the enthusiasm, your highness, but my queen was hoping to use the persuasions of intimidation instead of resorting to violence outright.” The duchess’ tone seemed almost perfunctory as she intended on leveling expectations of what the queen needed from the Jatteson Earl. Her countenance, however, seemed a bit pleased by how Ein was able to galvanize the crowd.
Gabrielle, who out of the trio possessed the least amount of etiquette when it came to dealing with dignitaries, left her seat with a satchel of gifts for Ein’s wives. The three wives carried a patronizing tone when the priestess offered them perfumes from Megata. She presented them in a pidgin Fjeldorian tongue. “My father was actually from Field.” Her attempt at ingratiating herself with two of the Jatteson women fell short. However, Hrist was fascinated by Gabrielle’s knowledge of magic. What Hirst knew was how to conjure visions and heal but only through elixirs and ritual.
As the night went on, the Sirenians were able to let their guard down, imbibing a little more than they intended to. They rationalized that their mission was complete and also figured it would be rude to go against the Fjeld customs. The mead seemed to embolden some of the men in attendance. Nareen refused at least five advances from three separate men. Gabrielle was less forward by nature, speaking with a blacksmith who had taken a liking to her. The priestess tried politely to end the conversation to no avail.
"Intimidation isn't a problem for the Fjeldorian Warriors of the North. But, the idea of bloodshed will get them excited to ride South, something most here have never done. Our Naval power has excelled, which is why our land-based raids to the South have dwindled over the years." Despite his explanation, and no matter who he talked to, how much he drank, or whatever lady danced, his expression never broke. The smiles and smirks of the War Room did not return throughout the night, his face as stern and cold as the fields surrounding them. Even when his wife spoke to him, and the other wife took a liking to Gabrielle, his tone remained icy, leaning in to whisper to Sigrun.
"If I do bring back a fourth wife, you know better than anyone that it shall be exclusively for my personal benefit. She, like the rest of you, will never share my bed, nor carry my seed. Besides, I do not need to marry a Sirenian woman. This bond will be strong enough to grant me anything a wife of the South could." As he leaned back into his seat, his gestured to a slave, who brought him pen and parchment. Despite the reveling and merriment, he had found time to write. The Jarl leaned to his left, speaking to the Duchess.
"I am sending a raven to the King. He shall share in whatever we loot and whatever we are paid, and in return, when we ride south, the King will send even more warriors with me. It is part of the relationship the King has with his Jarls, in a manner not too unlike a Lord and his Vassals. If he agrees, with the combined forces of the Jatteson people and the men of the King, we will have with us a total of..." As he finishes writing, he holds the sheet up to proof aloud. "...eight hundred infantry, four hundred light cavalry, two hundred heavy cavalry, six hundred archers, three packs of Úlfhéðnar guerilla scouts, one pack of Úlfhéðnar warg riders, five war mammoths, and then my personal retinue. My retinue consists of fifteen thanes, seven huscarls, a shaman, and my two personal champions: Asbjorn Halfkin, a half giant berserk, and Hildisvíni the Brute, a ‘wereboar’ svinfylking. I say ‘wereboar,’ but it’s more of a myth that we Fjeldorians keep up to scare our enemies." The Jarl looks up at the Duchess. "Will these numbers impress Queen Lana? Or should I attempt to request more warriors?"
"I'm Sure Queen Lana Will Be Ecstatic To Hear That We Can Possibly Amass Such An Army. But I Should Set Some Expectations For You And Your King. As You Know Megata Is The Least Funded Queendom In Sirenia. We Will Do Our Best To Repay Your Men For Their Service, But I Surely Wouldn't Want To Overextend Our Request For What We Can Afford."
The morning light was not kind to the eyes that had seen mead for most of the prior night. There was reprieve, however. By the gods, the snow had stopped and the trails became easier to traverse. Ein's wives stayed behind, promising to tend to the farmer's needs, should there ever be an issue. It would normally take a week for a party of their size to arrive in Megata. However, they needed to take a furtive route. The party needed to avoid detection from the Calivians until the moment was right. Queen Lana couldn't risk word getting back to Oceania from the Calivians about her alliance with the Fields. The High Queen Inya's parent nation was the Brilean Empire and eternal adversaries to the Kingdoms of the north.
This trail brought the trio of Sirenians and their Fjeldorian allies through a long narrow pass. The party had left snowy grounds three days ago. Emilia and her compatriots are happy to ride without heavy furs on their backs.
"So tell me, your highness. Have you ever been this down south before?" The Duchess trying to pass the time with a bit of banter.
"Off to the right!" One of the Jarl's men yelled as he spotted a small band of Calivians running behind a boulder, hoping they'd escape detection.
The Jarl couldn't help but chuckle, even if his face remained stone cold. "We're Fjeldorians. We would intimidate and kill Southerners for half the offered price, if it pleased us. If these numbers suffice...then so be it. Tomorrow, we ride."
The ride south was one filled with quiet excitement. While boisterous folk, they understood the importance of stealth. A raid worked best when the raiders arrived before the victims had time to gather arms. Even the mammoths were kept calm thanks to their masters, who had raised the mammoths from birth, as it was the only way to properly train such beasts.
"I have, a few times. We haven't normally raided this far South, but it does happen. Normally, we go farther south via ship, but even those days have dwindled. It's the main reason my men were so eager to ride to Mega-'' When the Thane called out the Calivian scouts, the Jarl raised a hand, his index and middle finger raised. With a gesture and a noise similar to a howl, a group of warriors chased after the scouts. These men wore wolf furs, carrying a sword, seax, and shield, riding massive wolves the size of a horse. These beasts were wargs, and existed in realms even farther North than the home of the Jatteson. These men were the Úlfhéðnar cavalry, guerilla warriors who took up traditions unique to the group. Úlfhéðnar, the Fjeldorian word for 'Wolf Warriors,' studied the aspects of wolves, and how they hunted prey, and modified that hunting style into a form of guerilla warfare, sneaking behind enemy lines, finding the weakest point, and then entering a bloodthirsty rage when the time to strike was on high.
As the wargs and their riders chased down the Calivian scouts, one of the regular Úlfhéðnar packs followed behind, despite being much slower than the riders. "They will aid the Warg Riders if something were to happen to them. They will send word back if both packs either fail or fall in their duties." He turned his attention to the other packs. "Scout on ahead. Make sure no other scouts find us without encountering your blades first. If you encounter another scouting party, engage if you're confident, return if you're not." With a nod, the warriors run ahead of the traveling army, winding through the ravine like a pack of wolves going out on a hunt. "They've even learned to communicate in a manner similar to wolves, allowing long distance reconnaissance. Truly, they are more studied and learned than one would think...anyways, what was I saying? Something about traveling South...?"
Ein’s men were stealthy indeed. Even as they traversed quickly, their boots and the paws of the wargs they rode splashed quietly into the shallow waters of the ravine. Animal-like calls were all that could be heard from the band.
“Uh.. yes. I believe you were talking about never having raided this far south.” Duchess Emilia carried an occupied tone. She was taken aback by how militant Jarl Ein was. The typical soldier’s that Megata had been supplied with were far less organized or disciplined.
The Calivian scouts scurried on horseback, trying to get to higher ground where they could use the forest for cover. However, the wargs were relentless in their pursuit. The giant wolves nipped at the Calivian horses, who clearly were shaken by the very presence of the wargs. In an attempt to kick free from the jaws of death, the horses’ keepers were launched off their backs.
It was before long when the blood curdling shrieks could be heard from fallen Calivians. Emilia froze slightly, like a corpse on horseback. It was clear that the duchess was unacquainted with battle and the death that accompanied it.
Ein’s men eventually rendezvoused with the group. “My Jarl, we were able to dispatch the lot of them but one of those mongrels got away. Our pact lost the scent. He must have used thodur ash to throw us off.” Birger, one of the wolf riders spoke with shame as he relayed the news to his Jarl. Smearing the blood from his blade and applying it below the bulge of his left eye.
The thought of a Calivian scout relaying information to his king hung over the warg riders who failed to dispose of him. The thought also hung over Emilia. It wasn’t that she was fearful of the Calivians amassing a formidable army against the Fjeldorians. That wouldn’t be possible. Ironically, the duchess worried about word getting back to Sirenia’s capitol, Oceania. The High Queen would not be pleased to know Queen Lana circumvented her authority in order to court the Fjeldorian’s allegiance.
The response should have been fury. The riders were given a simple order, and yet one man escaped their grasp. Ein should have been prone to the rage that every Fjeldorian warrior so often succumbed to. Ein should have punished the riders, or at least the one who let the scout get away. Silence, unbearable for the few seconds that followed, Ein's eyes fixed directly on the rider...
Then, a smirk, not too dissimilar to the one shared in the War Room. "Good. Let the cowards know that the North is coming, a blizzard of blood and steel, a storm that will ravage their lands, slay their men, rape their wives, and burn their children. Let the cowards be reminded of the Fjedlorians their country feared for centuries. If they are smart, they will not engage us in open battle. Let's hope they're not smart, I do miss me a good battle!" The huscarls and thanes who heard the conversation laughed in agreement.
"Continue to scout ahead. Now that the enemy knows of our presence, we cannot let them get the advantage of surprise. You are not to return to the campaign until we reach the land of Megata, or unless you spot something. Your men will continue to hunt, Birger, and thank the Gods for that!" With his orders given, he turns to the Duchess with a rather relaxed expression. "You seem shaken. Don't worry, this isn't the part of 'intimidating the enemy' you'll have to deal with in the future. What needs to be done, will be done. Now...how much longer must we go through the ravine? Will we be clear of the canyon come twilight?" The question was one of genuine concern. It was clear that the Jarl didn't enjoy remaining in the ravine, what with the advantage of cover and high ground to any assailants that might strike.
Birger delivered his update to his Jarl with shame and tinges of fear. But when Ein used Birger’s failure as a rallying call, the wolf rider joined in the laughter before setting forth the path, ahead of the small army.
Emilia looked over at Ein to answer his question. She had only ever traveled through this ravine with a small, inconspicuous party. “We won’t be able to step foot on high ground until after the moon has risen.”
The sun had set. Earthshine and torches were the only things that illuminated the ravine. The shallow waters reflected the lunar light. Emilia knew that on the high ground, just on the other side, was Calivian territory. Although this territory wasn’t part of the kingdom proper, there would still be great cause for concern. Having stretched travel time longer than usual to reach high ground, the men and their beasts grew tired. However, the men were loyal enough not to make the slightest complaint of the fact. The lull of the night offered a treacherous calm.
Off to the close distance, flames emerged from torches. Torches that didn’t belong to Ein’s wolf riders. As the ground started to elevate, it came to view that Emilia weren’t the only ones who had allies with Fjeldorian peoples. A band of Calivians with a small group of a rival Fjeldorian clan, The Bjargburin, or the Stone Born, can be seen waiting patiently.
Emilia looked over at Ein with dread when she spotted Ein’s men dead, their bodies held up by pikes. The duchess’ face paler than the moonlight.
The shock on the faces adorning Ein's men quickly turned to rage. His people roared in response, eager to avenge their brothers. Soon, they too lit torches of their own, and began to grab their gear.
Ein seemed unfazed. When the men were ready for battle, he looked at Emilia...then at his huscarls. "Blow the Horn of Champions. If these Fjeldorians are true men of the North, they will respond. If they do not, and their men charge, set up a Shieldwall, Spearmen behind the Wall, Archers behind the Spearmen. Send the Cavalry to flank, have the Heavy go onto their right, the Light on their left. The Light will get there first, and distract the idiots long enough for the Heavy to spearhead them from behind." One of his huscarls nods, then turns his horse around and goes towards one of the pack mules.
The Jarl, stern as ever, turns to Emilia. "They may not answer the Call, but if they do...there will be little death tonight. See, the reason Jarls have Champions is twofold: One, to fight in place of the Jarl in a duel, and two, to face the Champion of an enemy army, and prevent all out bloodshed. When one Champion dies, the army who owned the losing Champion surrenders honourably, and unless they have broken any codes of honour, they winners usually let their enemies flee with their lives after granting a tithe. But, again...I do not expect the Bjargburin to answer the Call. They are undisciplined, and barbaric even by Fjeldorian standards. Most don't know how to make steel, and simple raid it or get paid in steel. Looks like the Calivians have a lot of spare steel...or perhaps they see it as a win-win. If we win, they get to keep what pay they promised the Stone Born. If they win, they obliterate us...pray to the gods they answer." Fear did not portray itself upon Ein's voice, but Emilia was a skilled politician, and could since the lick of fear and bravery in the Fjeldorian, an odd reminder that even the great Jarl of Jatteson was still a human being, with emotions...and fears.
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2020.07.02 09:23 CoopertheCamper Comprehensive Comic Book Catch-Up Guide
(Main Series) Friendship is Magic #1-4 The Return of Queen Chrysalis (Major Storyline)
Main Characters - Mane 6, CMC, Chrysalis
Summary - Queen Chrysalis has returned, replaced all the citizens of Ponyville with changelings, and kidnapped the CMC. Will the our heroes be able to stop her before it is too late? Or will rising tensions between the friends spell out their doom?
Quick Review - A worthy introduction to the comics with some fun character moments. Any comic drawn by Andy Price is worth checking out for the art alone. Chrysalis literally throws a kitten at a wall and it explodes into blood. 6/10
FiM #5-8 Nightmare Rarity (Major) (Highly Recommended)
Characters - Rarity, Mane 6, Luna, Spike
Summary - Rarity is overcome by insecurity and the fear that she doesn't provide enough to the group, and allows herself to be corrupted by Nightmare. As her friends rush to save her, Luna must overcome her own guilty past in order to defeat it again in the present.
Quick Review - Nightmare Rarity's design is superb. So are the moon denizens. Katie Cook's writing style can lean into the absurd sometimes, but she knows how to do an emotional moment. We see how Luna earned her flowing mane. Spike saves the day. Trixie gets a few lines. 8/10
FiM #9-10 Zen and the Art of Gazebo Repair (Highly Recommended)
Characters - Big Mac
Summary - Big Mac has to find nails to fix his gazebo during the Summer Wrap-Up festival. But the world has other plans for him.
Quick Review - Big Mac plays a wonderful comedic straight man. Seriously, the comic is hilarious, the art is amazing, and Big Mac is a chad. Dude has to fight off like four different mares fawning over him, including Luna. He just wants to repair his gazebo, for god's sake. 9/10
FiM #11-12 (Neigh Anything)
Characters - Cadance, Shining Armor, Biff Tannen
Summary - Discover the romantic tale of how Cadance and Shining Armor came to be. Can Shining Armor prove himself worthy to Cadance? Will she choose him over High School Gigachad Buck Withers? Probably.
Quick Review - I enjoy it. Not much to say. Shining Armor belts out some Oingo Boingo for Cadance, and lord knows there is nothing more romantic than singing about how much you love little girls. (6.5/10)
Annual 2013: Equestria Girls (The Fall of Sunset Shimmer)
Characters - Sunset Shimmer, Celestia
Summary - Sunset Shimmer is a magical prodigy. But Celestia will not further her teachings, because despite her prowess, the young sorcerer has much to learn. Sunset believes otherwise.
Quick Review - To everyone clamoring for a proper Sunset backstory and motivation I am proud to announce that this is not it. It's unbelievably vague and generic. It pains me as a massive Shimmerfriend. Also, all the human designs look like ayy lmaos. More so than the show. Hopefully they pick it up in the next EqG comic... (3/10)
FiM #13-14 (My Little Pirate)
Characters - Fluttershy, Mane 6, Hoofbeard
Summary - Fluttershy has become too attached to a fish she rescued, and regrets letting it go. So when a dangerous pirate arrives looking for a crew, she take it is an opportunity to reunite with her fish. Also a pirate adventure thing, Hoofbeard seeks a treasure behind a perilous journey.
Quick Review - Utterly forgettable. I really cannot be bothered to reread it for a review. It was okay I think? (5/10)
FiM #15-16 (The Book Worm)
Characters - Twilight, Mane 6
Summary - A magical bookworm begins devouring his way through Twilight's library. That wouldn't be such an issue (except to Twilight), if the characters from to books didn't begin popping up in the real world. Now Twilight and co must take down the bookworm in it's own domain: The Realm of Books.
Quick Review - I like Pinkie's fantasy world. Another just okay one. Lotta references to other media. Marvel, LoTR, Disney shlock, you get the idea. The void had some solid character moments for Twilight and Rainbow. (6/10)
Friends Forever #1: Pinkie & Applejack
Characters - Take a guess
Summary - In the issue, Applejack and Pinkie Pie enter a baking contest, and culinary hijinks ensue.
Quick Review - Rough start for FF. Predictable and silly. Art here is really not good. However, it does have Guy Fieri pony. (3/10)
Friends Forever #2: CMC & Discord (Highly Recommended)
Characters - CMC, Discord
Summary - Discord takes the crusaders to increasingly dangerous dimensions in their search for a cutie mark.
Quick Review - This one is super sweet. Some of the best Discord showing in the series. The CMC being some of the only ponies to understand and show gratitude towards Discord for his effort is so damn heartwarming. (8/10)
Friends Forever #3: Celestia & Spike (Highly Recommended)
Characters - Celestia, Spike
Summary - Spike wants to get Twilight something nice for her birthday, but the gift he settled on turns out to be slightly hard to come by. He enlists Celestia's help in getting the gift for her student, a gift found deep in the dangerous Crystal Mountains.
Quick Review - By far my favorite portrayal of Celestia. Lot of nice and touching dialogue between her and Spike, and some insight on Celestia's mindset as a ruler and teacher. Shame they went further down the "Celestia is an incompetent and petty klutz" route later on. (8/10)
FiM #17-20 (Reflections) (Major) (Recommended)
Characters - Mane 6, Celestia, Starswirl, Sombra
Summary - Celestia has been secretly visiting another dimension for quite some time. A world where good is evil, and evil is good, and she has fallen madly in love with the benevolent King Sombra. A world where she and Luna are villains threatening to take over both dimensions. And it's all her fault.
Quick Review - This one is super polarizing. For me, it's a collection of great ideas utilized poorly. The mirror dimension is a very interesting concept that I wish would be re explored. And i'm content with all the characters. But the climax, touching as it maybe, kinda dampens this one for me. Still, (7/10)
Friends Forever #4: Twilight & Shining Armor
Characters - ^^^^^
Summary - Twilight Sparkle is worried her and Shiny have drifted apart since their foalhoods. An opportunity presents itself to rekindle when her and Shining Armor team up to catch a ghost that haunts the Crystal Empire palace.
Quick Review? - Turns out, there are a lot of FF comics, and a lot of them are pretty inconsequential. There are only so many times I can say, "It was cute. I liked it." before that gets redundant. So unless I have something more to say, i'm gonna reduce these to just Rating and Summary. Pretty good tho. (6/10)
Friends Forever #5: Fluttershy & Zecora
Summary - Fluttershy and Zecora try to figure out why Fluttershy can suddenly hear her animal friends talk. Spoilers: It was Discord. Go figure.
Rating - (4/10)
Friends Forever #6: Rainbow Dash & Trixie
Summary - Rainbow Dash is called upon by a newly crowned Queen Trixie to perform for a kingdom of Diamond Dogs. Turns out being Queen isn't all its cracked up to be.
Rating - I mean, it's got Trixie. (6/10)
FiM #21-22 (Manehattan Mysteries) (Recommended)
Characters - CMC, Babs, Trixie, AJ, Rarity
Summary - Doesn't need one. Trixie and Babs are in it. Go read it.
Quick Review - The relationship between Babs and Trixie here and they parallels they draw from each other are pretty great. I always love those kinds of strange character interactions. (7/10)
Friends Forever #7: Pinkie & Luna
Summary - Princess Luna seeks Pinkie Pie's help in making ponies laugh so she can participate in a Royal Event.
Rating - (6/10)
Friends Forever #8: Applejack & Rarity
Summary - Typical Rarijack episode, road trip edition.
Rating - It introduces those stupid bull cowboys. For that (4/10)
FiM Issue 23 (Pets to the Rescue)
Characters - Angel, Winona, Opalescence, Owliscious, Gummi, Tank
Summary - When there owners are nowhere to be found, the pets team up and must set out to find their owners and assist them in whatever magical conundrum they may have found themselves in.
Quick Review - I think the villain here would have been really interesting in almost any other scenario. Other than that, minimal dialogue, and the art isn't exceptional, so (5/10)
Friends Forever #9: Granny & The Flimflam Bros
Summary - Granny Smith helps Flim and Flam patch things up after they have a falling-out over a mare.
Rating - This one is pretty wholesome. (7/10)
FiM Issue 24 (Discord in Time)
Characters - Discord, CMC, Flutters
Summary - Discord take the CMC and Flutterbutter on an a journey through time to show them some animals. Hijinks ensue.
Quick Review - Another really nice Discord issue. He isn't use to having all these friends and watching out for them in his chaos, so he drags them along in his dangerous adventures. He then immediately forgets this lesson. (7/10)
Friends Forever #10: Fluttershy & Iron Will (Major)
Summary - Fluttershy helps Iron Will with has marital problems.
Rating - (6/10)
Friends Forever #11: Rainbow Dash & Spitfire
Summary - Rainbow Dash helps Spitfire overcome her greatest fear: Children.
Rating - Art style is cute, but super jarring. (6/10)
FiM #25-26 (The Good, the Bad and the Ponies)
Characters - AJ, Mane 6, Bulls
Summary - Doesn't matter.
Quick Review - Don't read this one. Seriously, it's bad. Nothing really makes sense. Applejack has some sort of brain defect. Twilight arbitrarily cannot use her magic on Equestrian citizens. Even when they are dangerous criminals, apparently? (1/10)
Friends Forever #12: Pinkie & Twilight
Summary - Twilight tries to help Pinkie overcome her harrowing cocaine addiction. When that fails, Twilight starts doing coke herself to make the guilt go away. Pinkie stops doing coke for like five minutes, and Twi considers that a success.
Rating - (4/10)
Equestria Girls Annual 2014: Holiday Special
Characters - Humane 6, Sunset Shimmer, CMC
Summary - The holidays are nearing, and Sunnybun is feeling pretty down in the dumps. The girls try to cheer her up by inviting over for a few nights of debauchery. This cheers her up a bit. So, the Humane 5 go home on the shortbus and Sunny walks home, finally content with herself. Meanwhile the CMC decide that Sunset is keeping them from spending time with their sisters(?) and start a social media account in her name, called Anon-A-Miss, which they use to spread explicit photos of their sisters from the "sleepovers" and frame Sunset. Everyone in the school begin to tragically suffer from severe mental deficiencies and buy it immediately. Because the chick who just saved all of your sorry asses from soul sucking harlots like a week ago is going to post shit about her friends with her fucking face attached to the account.
Quick Review - I really wish I could shit on this more, but I got quite a bit to get through. (-3/10)
Friends Forever #13: Rarity & Babs Seed
Summary - In the issue, Rarity must entertain Babs Seed when Sweetie Belle falls ill. Turns out Babs idea of entertainment is different than Rarity's.
FiM #27-28 (The Root of the Problem) (Major)
Characters - Mane 6, Bramble, King Aspen
Summary - The Everfree spontaneously begins protruding into Ponyville. At the root of this problem, the druid-esque Deers who wish to reclaim the parts of their forest that were lost.
Quick Review - The Deer are really neat, and having them be the night elves of Equestria is a fun concept. But the deer people kind of get the shaft, and most of the story focuses on the avaricious minotuar Well-to-do. (6.5/10)
Friends Forever #14: Luna & Spike
Summary - In the issue, Princess Luna enlists Spike's help in solving a dragon problem in Fillydelphia.
Rating - Luna and Spike spend three pages together, and the rest of the story is focused on an annoying pink fangirl dragon. (4/10)
Friends Forever #15: Applejack & Mayor Mare
Summary - In this issue, politics are boring.
Rating - (5/10)
FiM Issue #29 (Ponymania XXIX)
Characters - Cheerilee, Cherry Blossom
Summary - Cheerilee reunites with her twin sister—one of the most famous wrestlers in Equestria. But when Cherry Blossom gets injured, Cheerilee is forced to take her place in the ring.
Quick Review - As with most Jay Fosgitt's stuff, cute, but a lot of fluff and not much to carry an interesting story. (6/10)
FIENDship is Magic #1: King Sombra (Major) (Highly Recommended)
Characters - Sombra, Radiant Hope
Summary - Twilight Sparkle and Princess Cadance discover King Sombra's diary and learn of his rise to power. But before that, how he was a sickly outcast, a troubled young amnesiac whose only friend was the equally strange Radiant Hope, who still had imaginary friends.
Quick Review - Much needed backstory for Sombra, and very well done at that. His connection to Radiant Dawn feels genuine, and his corruption by way of shitty crystal ball is absolutely tragic. My dude just wanted to go the Crystal Faire ): Also Princess Amore fucking dies. (9/10)
FIENDship is Magic #2: Tirek (Recommended)
Characters - Tirek, Scorpan, Sendak
Summary - Tirek, young and ambitious, sneaks out of his royal families castle to visit the unhinged sorcerer Sendak to learn more about magic. Scorpan is worried about his brothers ambitions.
Quick Review - Doesn't add much character depth to Tirek, but it's suitable. Presents a lot of cool ideas not explored as thoroughly as they could be. Leaves a lot up to interpretation and head canon. (7/10)
FIENDship is Magic #3: Sirens (Non-Canon)
Characters - The Dazzlings, Starswirl
Summary - The fate of the world is determined by a music battle, and if the Dazzlings win, all is lost. This is not Rainbow Rocks.
Quick Review - Not a single character acts in character, and while the other Fiendship issues are take themselves pretty seriously, this one is drastically different tonally and opts for comedy. Which really sucks, because I wanted actual backstories for the Sirens. Humor falls flat as well. (2/10)
FIENDship is Magic #4: Nightmare Moon
Characters - Nightmare Moon, Nyx (Not that Nyx)
Summary - A recently banished Nightmare Moon attempts exacts revenge on Princess Celestia through the world of dreams. The Nyx, the keepers of the dreams, will not allow it.
Quick Review - I much prefer Nightmare Moon as a manifestation of Luna's negative emotions over depictions a corrupting parasitic entity. Story is serviceable, a bit sad, nothing noteworthy. (6/10)
FIENDship is Magic #5: Queen Chrysalis (Major)
Characters - Twilight, Chrysalis
Summary - The Mane Six visit the imprisoned Queen Chrysalis, who recounts her past exploits.
Quick Review - Case of unreliable narrator here. Chrysalis implies that changelings are made of pure dark magic, which is an idea I actually quite like, but having them reform like they did would say otherwise. Story is sorta all over, like a Chrysalis anthology short. (6/10)
Friends Forever #16: Diamond Tiara & Silver Spoon
Summary - Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon compete against the Cutie Mark Crusaders in a scavenger hunt.
Rating - Smokin' hot goth pony makes an appearance. (7/10)
FiM #30-31 (Ponyville Days)
Characters - Rarity, AJ, Twilight
Summary - Civil War over a land dispute or something, can't really be bothered with this one.
Quick Review - As far as I remember, this is one of the issues that gives everyone in Ponyville a crippling case of "has to wear a helmet while outside". Dumbing down characters to make a story work is obnoxious. (3/10)
Friends Forever #17: Twilight & Big Mac
Summary - Twilight takes a trip into Big Mac's brain to learn how to focus as well as he does.
Rating - (7/10)
Friends Forever #18: Rainbow Dash & Fluttershy
Summary - Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy go to their flight camp reunion.
Rating - Pretty adorable. (7/10)
FiM #32-33 (Night of the Living Apples)
Characters - Mane 6, Spike
Summary - Apples take over Ponyville. Our heroes turn into bats. This is not a crackfic.
Quick Review - Batpony designs are pretty damn cool. Story is whatever. (5/10)
FiM #32-33 (Night of the Living Apples)
Summary - Rarity gets carried away when she goes into business with Mr. and Mrs. Cake.
Rating - (6/10)
Friends Forever #20: Luna & Discord (Recommended)
Summary - Princess Luna helps Discord when he has trouble sleeping.
Rating - Neat character dynamic. Good stuff for Luna and Discord. (8/10)
FiM #34-37 (Siege of the Crystal Empire) (Major) (Non-canon) (Highly Recommended)
Characters - Sombra, Mane 6, Chryssi, Umbrums
Summary - A mysterious new villain brings several of the series' past antagonists together to attack the Crystal Empire.
Quick Review - I want to keep my gushing about this one brief. The umbrum design and lore are some of the best things to come out of the comics. This Sombra is infinitely better than the one in the show. I definitely didn't cry at the end because i'm a big boy. (9/10)
Friends Forever #21: Spike & Zecora
Summary - Spike and Zecora save Ponyville from a disease, and only they are immune.
Rating - (7/10)
Friends Forever #22: Celestia & Pinkie
Summary - Princess Celestia tasks Pinkie Pie with making the perfect cake for Princess Luna's birthday party.
Rating - Barely any Celestia. (4/10)
Friends Forever #23: Applejack & Fluttershy
Summary - Applejack and Fluttershy become involved in the search for a legendary creature called the Pigasus. They must keep its existence a secret.
Rating - No Kirin (5/10)
Friends Forever #24: Rarity & Gilda
Summary - Gilda enlists Rarity's help in designing uniforms for a new sports team in Griffonstone.
Rating - (6/10)
FiM #38-39 (Don't You Forget About Us)
Characters - CMC, Diamond Tiara, Snips, Snails
Summary - The Cutie Mark Crusaders, Diamond Tiara, Silver Spoon, Snips, and Snails become lost in the mountains during a class field trip. AB and Diamond Tiara are forced to learn how to work together.
Friends Forever #25: Rainbow Dash & Twilight
Summary - Rainbow Dash seeks Twilight Sparkle's help after her wings mysteriously vanish.
Rating - Weird body horror. (7/10)
Friends Forever #26: Shining Armor & Prince Blueblood
Summary - Shining Armor is forced to work with Prince Blueblood on a diplomatic mission to Yakyakistan.
Rating - Holy shit they made Blueblood redeemable. (8/10)
FiM Issue #40 (Twilight meets Spike)
Characters - Twilight, Spike
Summary - You know, it's exactly how it sounds.
Quick Review - Very cute. (7/10)
Friends Forever #27: Pinkie & Granny Smith (Recommended)
Summary - Pinkie Pie offers to help Granny Smith after she breaks her hip right at the start of cider season.
Rating - Precious. (7/10)
FiM Issue #41 (Rainbow Dash and the Very Bad Day)
Characters - Zecora, Rainbow
Summary - Rainbow Dash is being a c**t, and enrages literally everybody else in Ponyville. In other words, they captured her character just right in this one.
Quick Review - I like rhyme schemes, but I hate bluefast. (4/10)
Friends Forever #28 Princess Luna and the Cutie Mark Crusaders
Summary - The Cutie Mark Crusaders assist Princess Luna during a foal slumber party at Canterlot Castle.
Rating - I like bone pony. (6/10)
FiM Issue #42 (A Pinkie Pie Story That Pinkie Pie Kinda Sorta Remembers) (Recommended)
Characters - Rarara, Ponker Po
Summary - Pinker Pop, still cooling off from her ten month long cocaine binge, tries to help Rarity make a gift for a friend very special to her.
Quick Review - Very cute, very funny, cried. (8/10)
Friends Forever #29 Rarity and Maud Pie
Summary - Rarity assists Maud Pie in her rock science interests and helps her discover her inner enthusiasm.
Rating - Nice Maud character development. (7/10)
FiM Issue #43-45 (Ponies of Dark Water) (Major) (Recommended)
Characters - Mane 6, Luna, CMC, Spike
Summary - The Mane 6 bathe in cursed waters and become distorted versions of themselves. Pinkie Pie becomes a domestic terrorist.
Quick Review - I like the part where Pinkie bombs a movie theater potentially killing dozens of ponies. Hilarious. (8/10)
Friends Forever #30 Twilight Sparkle and Princess Cadance
Summary - Twilight Sparkle helps her sister-in-law Princess Cadance when she suffers from an unexplained lack of self-esteem.
Rating - I quite like this little arc for Cadance. (7/10)
Friends Forever #31 Rainbow Dash and Little Strongheart
Summary - Little Strongheart seeks Rainbow Dash's help in finding a legendary creature called the Rainbow Crow.
Rating - Little Strongheart, where ya been for six years dude? Beautiful art. (7/10)
Friends Forever #32 Fluttershy and Daring Do
Summary - Daring Do enlists Fluttershy's help in uncovering an ancient treasure. She must also face her arachnophobia.
Rating - Better than the actual Flutters/Do episode. (7/10)
FiM Issue #46-47 (Election)
Characters - Twilight, Mayor Mare, Donald Trump
Summary - Mayor Mare struggles in her bid for reelection, against definitely not Donald Trump guys I swear.
Quick Review - Haha I lied, but like I totally got you though right? Like it was super subtle? I bet you didn't even catch on. (5/10)
Friends Forever #33 Applejack and Cherry Jubilee
Summary - Applejack learns the secret history of Cherry Jubilee.
Rating - Cherry Jubilee is pretty hot. (6/10)
FiM Issue #48-50 (Chaos Theory) (Major) (Recommended)
Characters - Discord, Starlight, Mane 6
Summary - An astronomical event causes Discord to transform from a creature of chaos to a being of pure order. But not all is at seems with the newly minted Accord.
Quick Review - Starlight gets one arc throughout all of these comics. luckily it's pretty good. She gets some good character growth. Accord is pretty god damn terrifying. Actual sound logic is used to best the villain, which is pretty rare. (8/10)
Friends Forever #34 Pinkie Pie and Cheese Sandwich
Summary - Pinkie Pie and Cheese are eaten by a possessed party house. Seriously.
Rating - (6/10)
Friends Forever #35 Twilight Sparkle and Starlight Glimmer
Summary - Twilight Sparkle and Starlight Glimmer's attempt to organize the books in the Castle of the Two Sisters turns into a battle of egos.
Rating - This would have been much better is not illustrated by Fosgitt. It doesn't suit this more weighty type of story. (7/10)
Friends Forever #36 Rainbow Dash and Soarin (Recommended)
Summary - Rainbow Dash follows Soarin to a remote location to help him with a dangerous mission.
Rating - Great Soarin and Spitfire moments. (8/10)
Friends Forever #37 Rarity and Trixie
Summary - Dude, it's got two of the best pones. Read it.
Rating - (7/10)
FiM Issue #51-53 (From the Shadows) (Major)
Characters - Mane 6, Donut Steel
Summary - The edgiest OC to ever exist begins to erase Equestrian history from books and minds, in fear of his heritage catching up to him.
Quick Review - Super interesting villain motivation, terribly generic villain design. (7/10)
My Little Pony: Deviations
Characters - Prince Blueblood, Mane 6, Nightmare Moon
Summary - Have you ever wondered what would have happened if Prince Blueblood was sent to Ponyville instead of Twiliight? No? Too bad, dude.
Summary - I would have loved to have gotten more deviations. Read about Blueblood being an arrogant prick for half an hour. It's fine. (6/10)
Friends Forever #38 Princess Celestia and Princess Luna (Recommended)
Summary - Princess Celestia and Princess Luna's minor squabbling escalates just before they plan to participate in the Sisterhooves Social.
Quick Review - Friends Forever Finale. Andy Price outdoes himself yet again. Hilarious and Heartwarming. (8/10)
FiM Issue #54 (I Didn't Read This One)
Summary - No seriously, didn't read it. Fosgitt, Fluttershy, fluff, the three F's of i'm going to be fucking bored. Maybe it's a masterpiece. I'll never know.
FiM Issue #55-56 (Wings Over Yakyakistan)
Characters - Rainbow, Rutherford, Ember, Spike, Pinkie
Summary - When the dragons invade Yakyakistan over an ancient treaty, it's up to heroes to defend the Yaks and try and diffuse the situation. Spike doesn't like the idea of fighting his own kind.
Quick Review - Let it be known that I would have been totally cool with the Yaks getting destroyed. Typical let go of the past, look to the future stuff. Rainbow's parents are here, and they are fun, and Spitfire gets a bit of extra love, so (7/10)
FiM Issue #57 (Apinkalypse Now)
Characters - Pinkie, Mane 6, Discord
Summary - Pinkie Pie accidentally becomes trapped in Discord's realm. If you wanted to see more of Chaos Pinkie, then here you go.
Quick Review - I really like the how the chaos dimension is shown in the comic, in that adapts to the current owner if they themselves can't be turned. You'll notice by this point the writers will do whatever in their power to make sure Starlight can be written out somehow. (7/10)
FiM Issue #58 (The Vines That Bind)
Characters - Twi, Flutts, Zecora, Cattail, Aqua Vine
Summary - Twilight Sparkle, Fluttershy, and Zecora follow the notes of Mage Meadowbrook search for a flower said to cure any ailment. The search soon becomes an obsession for Twilight, determined to get her name in the history books.
Quick Review - Dude, Twilight, you already saved the world at least seven times. That Magenta Bloom shit would just be a footnote. Overall pretty forgettable. (5/10)
FiM Issue #59 (Pie in the Sky)
Characters - Rainbow, Pinkie
Summary - Jesus Christ Pinkie she doesn't fucking like pie. We had a whole episode about just this. We didn't need a comic to teach the same lesson. That's a;lso your review. (3/10)
FiM Issue #60 (The Stars on Our Ponies)
Characters - CMC, Gilded Lily
Summary - The Cutie Mark Crusaders help a filly who doesn't want to follow in her family's footsteps. But she is scared to disappoint them if she does pursue her own interest.
Quick Review - Gilded Lily's design is absolutely adorable. She also looks like she tastes pretty good, like Oranges n' Creme. Solid one-off. (7/10)
FiM Issue #61-62 (Convocation of the Creatures!) (Major)
Characters - Twilight, Raven
Summary - Twilight Sparkle makes a discovery during the largest assembly of creatures in history that threatens to redraw the map of Equestria.
Quick Review - Glenda canonically has a stutter, making her best changeling. Good bit of overbuilding in this one, without falling into the common trap of making the convocation feel too modern. (7/10)
FiM Issue #63 (All in Marederation)
Characters - Twilight, Pinkie, Temperance
Summary - Ponyville gets swept by an anti-sugar movement that threatens to put Sugarcube Corner out of business.
Quick Review - MLP's thinly veiled take on the Temperance Movement. Another one where all of Ponyville is turned into exceptional individuals. (4/10)
FiM Issue #64 (Everything Old) (Recommended)
Characters - Rarity, Fluttershy, Coco Pommel
Summary - Fluttershy and Rarity travel to Manehattan, where Rarity discovers that old, ugly fashions are back in style.
Quick Review - I absolutely adore the message here. Things you made when you were younger that you maybe embarrassed of now don't have to be cast aside and forgotten. Rather, look to them to see how you have improved and how you can still improve. Coco is a QT. (8/10)
My Little Pony: Legends of Magic Annual 2018 (Major) (Recommended)
Characters - The Pillars, Pony of Shadows
Summary - The Pillars of Old Equestria face a new danger that tests their skills as a team. One that they may find feels a bit like a deja vu.
Quick Review - I really like the relationship between Stygian and Rockhoof here. I wonder if Starswirl was always meant to be a dickhead? Green Pony of Shadows looks badass as fuck. Also, Somnambula is cute as hell. (7/10)
Edit - Consider there are twelve of these. I am not awake enough to add them all. Read' em. They're pretty good lore stuffs.
FiM Issue #65 (Queen for One Less Day) (Recommended)
Characters - Celestia, Scarlet Petal
Summary - Princess Celestia disguises herself to live among ordinary ponies for a day. But when her magical necklace is stolen by a thief, she may lose the ability to turn back into herself for good.
Quick Review - I love this comic. Shows off the best parts of Celestia's character. I'm running out of synonyms for heartwarming, so just go read this one. (8/10)
FiM Issue #66 (Applewood Follies)
Characters - Mane 6
Summary - Twilight Sparkle and her friends discover that a film is being made about them. But when the director hands them the reins, they discover it's harder to make a movie than they thought.
Quick Review - I'm really not a fan of more modern tech in Equestria. I don't mind it at all if it's used as a background gag, but here, where it's the plot of the comic, I just find it obtrusive.
Ponyville Mysteries Issue 1
Characters - CMC, Nurse Redheart
Summary - "Welcome to a new series of mystery and intrigue! The Cutie Mark Crusaders discover their inner detectives and solve crimes nopony else can! Will they be able to discover who is stealing supplies from Ponyville hospital and get their schoolwork done at the same time?"
Quick Review - None of these are particularly engaging, so I won't review the rest. When I figure these mysteries out all by myself like the grown man I am I feel particularly proud, like I just solved a crossword puzzle they have on those Kiddie menus at iHop.
Ponyville Mysteries Issue 2
Characters - CMC, The Dude
Summary - "There's a major mystery at the... bowling alley? Ponyville's team is set to break a bowling record, but the alley keeps being ransacked by a mystery criminal! Will the Cutie Mark Crusaders be able to set the pins right and solve the caper?"
Ponyville Mysteries Issue 3
Characters - CMC, Old People
Summary - "The Cutie Mark Crusaders must solve a dangerous mystery at the Ponyville Retirement Village before it's forced to close! Is one of the curmudgeonly residents to blame or could it be a villain from their past?"
FiM Issue #67-68 (Tempest's Tale) (Major) (Highly Recommended)
Characters - Tempest, Cadance, Glitter Drops
Summary - Tempest Shadow travels across Equestria to learn more about friendship and comes face-to-face with her past.
Quick Review - These issues do wonder for Tempest's previously scarce character. If your a fan of Tempest, or especially if your not a fan of Tempest, check these out. Smug Cadance is best Cadance. (8/10)
Ponyville Mysteries Issue 4
Characters - CMC, Applejack
Summary - "The Cutie Mark Crusaders are trying to solve the case of the missing spa water! But what happens when all signs point to a member of a Crusader's own family being the culprit?"
FiM Issue #69 (Magical Apple)
Characters - Pinkie, Mane 6
Summary - Pinkie gets god powers. Again. Didn't we do this already?
Quick Review - Oh, Pinkie, maybe someday somebody will figure out how to write you well again. (4/10)
Ponyville Mysteries Issue 5
Characters - CMC, Rarity
Summary - "The Crusaders have their biggest case yet when a priceless artifact belonging to superstar Songbird Serenade is stolen!"
FiM Issue #70 (Extreme Bingo)
Characters - Golden Horseshoe Gals, Rainbow, AJ
Summary - Grannies Gone Wild 2!
Quick Review - Grannies Gone Wild 2! (5/10)
FiM Issue #71 (Happy Haunts)
Characters - Student 6
Summary - Twilight Sparkle's School of Friendship students experience Nightmare Night in Ponyville for the first time. Things don't exactly go as planned.
Quick Review - I hate this issue. Not because it's bad, but because we are teased with infinitely more interesting stories. I want to see the princesses on Nightmare Night, like the cover! I want to see Shim and Glim's NN, like on the first page! Fucking cocktease. (4/10)
FiM Issue #72 (Pie in the Sky, Again)
Characters - Pinkie, AJ, Pear Butter
Summary - Applejack discovers an old Apple family pie recipe and seeks to recreate it for Granny Smith. Along the way, they meet ponies who her mom has touched in her life. I wouldn't mind being touched by Pear Butter.
Quick Review - Standard. Wholesome. Sweet. (7/10)
My Little Pony: Nightmare Knights (Major) (Highly Recommended)
Characters - Luna, Stygian, Trixie, Capper, Tempest, Daybreaker, Eris
Summary - Princess Luna assembles a team of former villains to face a new threat to Equestria.
Quick Review - I cannot recommend this arc enough. Every single character gets a chance to shine. Stygian gets much need development. Eris and Daybreaker make a menacing evil duo. The villain casino makes a great setting. Sunset Shimmer gets a cameo. (Even though her and Starlight are once again shafted.) Capper absolutely steals the show. Tempest is a bit more brutish than she usually is, but as we don't know much about her anyway, that's a very minor gripe. (9/10)
FiM Issue #73 (Copycats)
Characters - Fluttershy, Twilight
Summary - A magical amulet causes Fluttershy to become more animalistic.
Quick Review - I have no idea what the fuck what went on in this issue or why. It's a mess. (3/10)
FiM Issue #74 (On the Mane Stage) (Recommended)
Characters - Zephyr, Fluttershy, Silverstream, Pixie Cut
Summary - Fluttershy's brother Zephyr Breeze attends the All-Equestria Mane Styling Conference.
Quick Review - Even Zephyr Breeze can snag a qtπ hairstylist gf. There is hope for us yet, bros. Could you tell i'm down a third of a bottle of Grey Goose by this point? (7/10)
FiM Issue #75-78 (Major) (Recommended)
Characters - Cosmos, Twilight, Discord, Fluttershy
Summary - The Mane Six's quest for the fallen stars of a missing constellation puts them on a collision course with their most galactic adversary yet. Discord's clingy ex wife who still hasn't received any child support.
Quick Review - They don't even bother to write Starlight out anymore. She just doesn't exist. Cosmos isn't as fun of a villain as Eris or the Storm King, but she's serviceable. I do like her design. Discord puts his past behind him for good physically and metaphorically. (7/10)
FiM Issue #79 (The Ponyville Anniversary Spectacular) (Highly Recommended) (Major!)
Characters - Sunset Shimmer, I don't know I don't remember the rest
Summary - Fuck you it has Shim Sham.
Quick Review - Sunnybutt jams out on a guitar at the end. (11/10)
My Little Pony: Spirit of the Forest
Characters - CMC, Filthy Rich, Diamond Tiara, Mayor Mare
Summary - Something about a forest mystery?
Quick Review - Lackluster follow up to the amazing Nightmare Knights. Stop giving the CMC mini series you hacks. (4/10)
FiM Issue #80 (Live-Action Role Pony!)
Characters - Mane 6, Bulk Biceps
Summary - The Mane Six play a live-action role-playing game. The usual Pinkie hijinks ensue.
Quick Review - I'm so use to using LARP as an insult now, it's weird to see it in an endearing manner. Fun little adventure issue. (6/10)
FiM Issue #81 (Pretty Fly)
Characters - Scootaloo, Rumble, Rainbow, Wind Sock
Summary - Scootaloo and Rumble learn about the only Earth pony to become a member of the Wonderbolts.
Quick Review - Heartwarming. Seriously, someone get me thesaurus. (6.5/10)
FiM Issue #82 (Dog-Dog-Dogged Determination)
Characters - Rarity, Mane 6, Celestia, Cerberus
Summary - Rarity is tasked with giving Cerberus obedience training after he leaves his post at Tartarus again.
Quick Review - Dude, Rares, never change. (6/10)
FiM Issue #83 (The Strange Case of Silver Blaze)
Characters - Twilight, Spike
Summary - Twilight Sparkle and Spike investigate when a famous racing tortoise goes missing.
Quick Review - Less Sherlock Holmes and more Ace Ventura: Pet Detective. This is a good thing. (6/10)
My Little Pony: Feats of Friendship (Major) (Recommended)
Characters - Student Six, Swift Foot
Summary - Come one, come all, to the School of Friendship's very first sporting event-the Feats of Friendship! As Sandbar, Smolder, Gallus, Ocellus, Yona, and Silverstream prepare for the new competition, they realize they're going to need one more pony to round out their team. Enter Swift Foot, a mysterious new exchange student! But will she help strengthen the Young Six's bonds of friendship-or just drive them apart? Jealousy threatens our favorite youngsters in this brand-new miniseries!
Quick Review - This is by far and away my favorite Student 6 depiction in the franchise. It shows off very well how far they have come and how well they work together as friends and individuals. Swift Hoof makes for a great antagonist, trying to plant seeds of resentment but realizing that it doesn't work on the students and realizing her own faults. Dom Athenian Warrior waifu also included. (8.5/10)
FiM Issue #84 (Identity Crisis)
Characters - Ocellus
Summary - Ocellus struggles to complete a big project for the School of Friendship midterm.
Quick Review - Man, I wish my problem was that I was so booksmart I had trouble fitting it all into my creative outlets. What a fucking struggle that would be. But I understand wanting to be a perfectionist, and that sucks. Amazing insight as usual by me. (5/10)
FiM Issue #85 (Apple Bobbing)
Characters - AJ, AB, Big Mac
Summary - Applejack teaches Apple Bloom the meaning of courage by telling her the story of how she conquered her fear of the water when she was little.
Quick Review - A whole lot of touching moments between AJ and AB. A very cozy little story if you ignore the giant spider. (7/10)
FiM Issue #86 (Marble and a Hard Place)
Characters - Maud, Marble Pinkie
Summary - Pinkie Pie and Maud Pie help their sister Marble make friends by helping her throw a party.
Quick Review - I love the Pie family, dude. The chemistry between them is something we don't get to see often enough. (6.5/10)
FiM Issue #87-88 (The Fast and the Furriest)
Characters - Big Mac, Rainbow, Angel
Summary - Rainbow Dash and Big McIntosh take part in the Draytona Breach 500, which an antiquities dealer uses as cover to smuggle a priceless artifact.
Quick Review - Meh. (6/10)
I can finally pass out now.
submitted by CoopertheCamper
to mylittlepony [link] [comments]
2020.06.28 03:10 oakvictor 6 - Evolução Planetária
Quero pedir desculpas pela demora em produzir esse texto. Estou completamente enrolado com trabalho nessa quarentena, trabalho por conta própria como professor e designer free-lancer e estou vendo oportunidade de crescer minhas redes sociais para a pós pandemia eu já ter um nome maior no mercado. Por isso, para ficar mais fácil, qual tema vocês acham que eu deveria escrever na próxima? Levando em conta a ordem necessária para alguém que nunca teve contato começar a entender melhor. Bom, vamos lá:
6 - Evolução Planetária
Nosso planeta está hoje passando majoriatariamente pela provas e expiações. Os estágios evolutivos são: mundo primitivo, expiações e provas, regeneração, ditosos e divinos. Isso não significa que todos estão no mesmo estágio de evolução, mas que a maior parte da população se encontra no provas e expiações.
Nossa fase atual se baseia em pagar por erros cometidos em encarnações, tentando se ajustar espiritualmente, sendo um espírito melhor a cada encarnação. Provas são as nossas dificuldades, acontecimentos terrenos, e até mesmo os acontecimentos bons que acontecem, e a nossa forma de reagir a eles são considerados provas por alguns espíritas.
Já li que a Terra deixou a fase primitiva e passou ao expiações e provas quando chegaram aqui os Exilados de Capela, quando as civilizações começaram a se formar com base mais sólida ao redor do globo.
Os exilados seriam espíritos originais do sistema solar da estrela Capela, onde evoluíram cientificamente mas não moralmente, portanto atrapalhavam o desenvolvimento dos que já estavam em outro nível de bondade. Isso não significa que eles eram maus, já que o conceito de mau é nossa interpretação, apenas foram enviados para cá para ter um local mais apropriado para suas provas e expiações. Inclusive, talvez você seja um exilado.
Geraldo Lemos, amigo íntimo de Chico Xavier diz que a Terra se tornará um planeta de regeneração em 2057, mostrando que nesse ano teremos mais pessoas em estado de regeneração do que em provas e expiações. Ou seja, estamos encarnados novamente no período pós Data Limite, pré regeneração.
Não é que um planeta em regeneração seja maravilhoso, ele é como andar de muletas depois de um acidente, onde você começa a se recuperar de uma situação trágica que foi o estágio anterior onde ainda havia maldade demais para bondade de menos.
A maldade do mundo não é culpa de Deus, mas dos espíritos ainda evoluindo. Façamos nossa parte nesta fase: espalhemos amor, compreensão, empatia, respeito e falemos da doutrina espírita para quem quiser ouvir.
submitted by oakvictor
to Espiritismo [link] [comments]
2020.05.14 00:10 firewoodspark A última vez que eu torci para o Grêmio
A última vez que eu torci para o Grêmio, como torcedor colorado, foi em 1983. Foi quando ele ficou campeão mundial. Eu tinha 9 anos. Adorava futebol, mas eu gostava da idéia de um gaúcho jogar a final do mundial, que na época era chamada de copa Toyota.
Como vocês sabem, o Grêmio ganhou, e eu fiquei bem feliz. No dia seguinte, fui encontrar os meus amigos. Eu morava em uma cidade do interior, e a maioria dos torcedores em cidades do interior do RS são gremistas. Mas ao invés de uma recepção calorosa, o que eu recebi foi um ódio que não estava esperando. Eles eram campeões, mas nós não éramos, e, por isso, a gente não valia nada—não importa o tri-campeonato brasileiro. Eles passaram o dia inteiro me incomodando.
Daí começou uma raiva que eu não sabia que era possível. O meu ódio pelo Grêmio não via fronteiras. Se o destino da terra dependesse do Grêmio ganhar contra os alienígenas, eu iria torcer para os alienígenas. Nada era perdoado. Grenal do século. Cinco muito. Rebaixamento. Eu andava de bicicleta com a bandeira do Inter quando a gente ganhava o campeonato gaúcho. Eu odiava o Paulo Santana.
Na metade dos anos noventa eu fiz uma webpage para o inter que é tão antiga que não aparece no Web Archive. Aqui tem um screenshot
. Claro, não era o melhor design em retrospecto (muito poluída), mas representava tanto o meu amor pelo inter quanto o ódio pelo Grêmio.
O Danrlei e o Ronaldinho Gaúcho me dão pesadelos até hoje. Quando o Inter finalmente ficou também campeão mundial, eu chorei, lembrando toda a humilhação que eu senti.
Mas o ódio não era tão grande assim. Minha mulher é gremista, mas dei um jeito de as crianças serem coloradas. Tive um pouco de sorte porque o Inter foi muito bem no início dos anos 2000.
Logo me mudei para os Estados Unidos, onde estou à doze anos, e comecei a ver as coisas de longe. A corneta não me incomoda mais. Ainda tenho um problema com o Felipão pelos 7x1 porque o pessoal aqui me enche o saco até hoje, mas não odeio o Grêmio mais. Eu vejo que a dupla Grenal depende deles mesmos. Eles precisam um do outro. Porto Alegre é demais; os dois tem estádios muito bonitos, que me dão orgulho. E não só POA; Atlético Mineiro e Cruzeiro; Palmeiras, Corinthians, Santos, e São Paulo; Flamengo, Vasco, Fluminense e Botafogo. E também os times do Nordeste—Ceará, Náutico (mesmo que perdeu aquele jogo para o Grêmio), Fortaleza. E até os de SC como o Chapecoense e o Avaí. O futebol do Brasil me faz feliz aqui fora. Apesar do tropeço contra a Alemanha, o pessoal nos respeita.
É fácil se envolver em discussões locais, brigar com os amigos, vizinhos. Mas aqui nos EUA o pessoal gosta mais de Barcelona, Liverpool, Bayern Munich, Juventus, PSG, futebol Alemão. Vamos mostrar para estes gringos quem é o país do futebol.
Enquanto isso, fico torcendo para o Seattle Sounders, que ganhou o campeonato duas vezes. Mas ainda não é time suficiente para bater o Barcelona, ou o Hamburgo. O futebol daqui ainda é um pouco lento, e burocrático.
Nada como o futebol brasileiro.
Edit: E é claro, o Santos do Pelé - o que eles conhecem mais aqui.
submitted by firewoodspark
to futebol [link] [comments]
2020.04.28 03:17 DLMercury Earning The Devil's Nod Pt 2 [2,733]
Hello all. Here is the 2nd part I've just completed. If you haven't read the first part and wish to catch up (which I'd recommend, otherwise this 2nd half won't make much sense), you can click on the Google Docs link below. So far the entire piece comes in at 3,804 words.
The initial post was 1,071 words, this second part (which I did not believe I'd be able to do at all) comes in at 2,733.
It's only "part 2" in the sense that it's the 2nd part of the story I've posted in this sub, but both constitute the same opening chapter. Yeah, chapter. I guess I've got to keep rolling with this sucker. I think the characters demand it more than the positive feedback I've gotten does. ;)
Here is Pt. 2 --
"Hai colpito un fulmine, amore mio. Come ti lanci in aria, anche mentre insegui la morte!"
I was in shock, though I had no good reason why. I assumed Ash only spoke English, one of my more hair-brained assumptions, I suppose. Of course she spoke Italian (well, it sounded Italian), and probably French, Russian, Japanese, maybe even that ancient bible language for all I knew. Ash was clearly a highly educated, sophisticated, and deadly woman. I should have known better.
Did she come from poverty? From wealth? Was she raised in the city or was her youth spent in the existential cul de sac of some dusty, nameless pueblo? Yeah, probably.
"I...I'm sorry, I don't understand", I stammered like the drunk I was. The DT's weren't far off, I could feel ‘em coming. "It's us again Willden, The DTs. Open up. We're here to have at your sweet little ass!"
I needed booze to quiet my nerves, but that could wait. I was too obsessed to worry about the shakes. And if Ash promised doom, I’d never have to worry about the jitters again anyway.
Ash continued as though she didn't hear me, in perfect English wrapped in purple velvet.
"...but I would have expected no less, especially from you, my poor, lovesick alcoholic."
A pang of shame. I instinctively glanced down at the empty shot glass on the bar in front of me.
Was it that obvious? Yeah, I guess it was, I knew it was. But I didn't care if the world knew that I was a two-bit hustling alky, most of the people in my un-life had some monkey of their own on their backs anyway. We all grow complacent with the shared knowledge that we're all degenerates of some sort. But Ash was different. I didn't want her
to see me, to know me, like this. "C'est ok mon amour.
It isn't your fault. The world is a cruel place as you know, and you appear to have been cruelly tested.” She straightened, taking a theatrical tone. “Forged in life's endless storms."
Could she hear my inner monologue too? She was describing me with the same words I used – no, thought
– to describe her.
The slick talker in me started to wake up, but only enough to give the illusion that I had regained some tiny measure of cool.
"So the world's most beautiful woman is a polyglot and a mind reader. I feel like a fool for being surprised."
Cocking her head and dropping an eyebrow, "You know what a 'polyglot' is? Ah, of course, you do. You may play at being a bad-boy, a black sheep, and a general failure at the honorable vocation Mr. Willden, but there is definitely a brilliant and sensitive man hiding under that rough exterior, scarred though he maybe."
I blinked, once, twice. "Wait, how the hell do you know my name?"
Tilting her head to the side and shifting her eyes to the bar, where $.86, a crumpled receipt for a 5th of Canadian Host, an apartment key, and a wallet sat, she read the business card sticking out from underneath.
"Darryl Willden. Insurance claims and investigations."
Ash smiled, and I took in her beauty in full measure. This woman was from another world, another dimension. In a room full of fashion magazine cover girls she would have been the object of open jealousy. And lust. Like a supermodel without the anorexia.
Who knew how many weak men like me she'd lured away from their wives.
But Ash wasn't merely a home-wrecker, she could inspire wars
. She couldn't have made it in this world if she didn't know and capitalize on the fact.
Her skin looked like pliable marble over steel rebar. Her features made it seem as though her skin should be the color of bronze, but it was nearly white. I had the strange sensation that I was in the presence of someone who could snap my neck like a toothpick, if they wanted to. It would have been alarming if I actually cared.
Ash was a contradiction. She could dispense pleasure as though she wrote the Kama Sutra herself, or set fire to an orphanage filled with children as easily as the grim reaper. And her smile, that smile
, she'd definitely be smiling that smile while she was – making love or burning an orphanage to the ground? Yeah, sure.
I know I wasn't the only poor bastard to fall to her charms. I shook with jealousy at the thought.
Her long, gently curled ebony hair was pulled up in an elegant bun, her bangs wisping down both sides of her face. She wore simple, small diamond drop earrings and no other jewelry I could see. No wedding ring on her finger, except a strange signet with a lion and a scorpion. I breathed a sigh of relief at that, did she notice? did she know why? Probably.
Her Makeup was simple, not that she needed much if anything – mascara (Givenchy – how did I know that, and what the hell is a 'Givenchy'?), a little smoky eyeshadow and maroon lipstick. French manicure nails. Like Darlene's.
Her resemblance to Sherlyn Fenn from Twin Peaks
was uncanny. Her voice reminded me of Kathleen Turner, with a world-traveled accent that was impossible to place. If Ash was trying to nail all of the Hollywood movie starlet tropes, she did it as though she invented the concept, and Hepburn, Hayworth, and Darnell were just students taking notes.
I was no Tyrone Power for sure, so why the hell was a woman like this chucking minutes down the can with a doomed fool like me? Oh yeah, right. Some grand scheme she cooked up, and I was the sucker that was supposed to play some part in it. At least, I hoped.
Of course, none of this struck me at the time as to how strange it all was. That's how it is when you're a drunk that's lost all hope. "Aliens landed on the White House lawn? You don't say. Zombies walk the earth in search of fresh brains? Don't bother with the boomstick, they'll starve soon enough. Archetypical femme fatale shows up out of nowhere and telepathically ropes me into slavery? Imagine that, pass the salt please."
I'd like to believe it was a result of some tragic, jaded lack of surprise. Wizened detachment. In reality, here in Margaritaville, I just stopped giving a shit anymore. Cheap rotgut was more like it, actually. The people in my world didn't drink for taste, and I couldn't recall the taste of a margarita if one were…well, it doesn't matter.
I snapped out of my thoughts for a moment, realizing that the first notes of Jimmy Buffet began trickling from the old beat-up jukebox in the corner. "Nibblin' on sponge cake Watchin' the sun bake…"
"You've got to be goddamned kidding me!"
Did I just say that out loud? I shook my head and laughed, feeling a strange sense of disbelief and apathy over these unreal events, and a vague concern that I was finally cracking up.
I realized Ash was staring at me, with something that almost resembled pity. She brought a slender hand to my cheek, which was wet with perspiration. I was humiliated, disgusted. My sweat was on her bare skin! I wanted to pull her hand away, to ask for a raincheck so I could get a few drinks in me, take a shower and get my shit together. But I couldn't move.
Her hand, cool to the touch, slid gently down my wet face and my eyes welled up. Easy now, Willden, don't go yellow here. Maybe big boys cry once in a while, but they sure as hell don't do it in the presence of the dark goddess that's come to claim them from their sustained, pointless ruin.
It was clear now. Ash wasn't faking concern for me. The pain reflected in her eyes was my own, doubled, quadrupled tenfold. Fathomless.
And that's just it – if I ended up fertilizing the daisies before this was over, having given myself completely to the deadly whims of a stunning female criminal mastermind, then all the better. I might die and go to hell again, sure, but I wasn't going to spend a moment thinking about it. I was in hell here, now
, and like some Florence Nightingale of the shadows, Ash appeared to pluck me from my perdition. She would save me, even if it meant my demise.
Yeah, I wasn't exactly thinking rationally.
For me, death and salvation were one and the same. Mine were tears of relief, of joy. Rescue had finally arrived, and it would come with terrible calamity. I was ok with that. She was a cause worth dying for and loved me enough to give me the opportunity. I wouldn't let her down.
I'd die really good. Extra-double-good.
Dammit. Here they come, that tremble that crawls up from the core of your being, uncontrollable, kicking the shit out of your helpless meat suit like a schoolyard bully taking your lunch money, who you know is going to bang the girl you've got a crush on in the back of his car later that night.
Something like that, anyway.
The DT's had me now, and I realized with horror that I was about 15 seconds from spilling my guts, literally. I needed a drink or five no doubt, but at this point booze would have to wait until I was finished with a worship session in front of the porcelain shrine. I don't know what I hated more, the humiliation of having to run off to puke my guts out or the fear that she'd be gone when I returned.
"I'm sorry Ash, is your name even 'Ash'? Anyway, I'm very tired. And very ill." I began salivating, and I knew I didn't have long. I could taste my bile rising.
"I know my love. She must have been beautiful."
Stunned silence. I forgot for a moment that I was in immediate and dire need of the nearest toilet.
"All of this. Your sickness, your addictions, your hopelessness, la tua vita morta
. All because of a beautiful woman. Perhaps many women, over the years. The old noir films weren't too far off the mark, art tends to imitate life rather well, after all. And she's dead of course, right my love? You punish yourself every night, thinking of her, blaming yourself. And you think of death, you romanticize it – but you are too cowardly to commit to the deed."
Her words didn't just sting, it was like being tossed naked into an icy lake. (Yeah, that happened once). She spared no expense when it came to the truth.
And I couldn't deny it, she was right, obviously. She sure had my number, and while Ash was a damned perceptive woman, I have to admit that I was such a sloppy mess, it wasn't too tough for the average mug to parse out the basic jist of where and how I went so damned wrong.
Besides, it's always a woman, isn't it? Always a beautiful dead woman, and a stupid, stupid man.
"Ash, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry but I'm very sick and I've got to run to the restroom. Don't leave, please God don't you leave, don't you fucking dare be gone when I get back!"
Smiling again, she motioned for me to go. "It's ok mon amour
, tend to your need. We have some time still, for dema pirsa, hahbib
Her words trailed off as I ran to the john, barely registering as I crashed through the first stall in the unisex bathroom, trying to heave my humiliation into the toilet bowl and not all over the floor. Jake was a good man, a straight-up guy, and he put up with my crap for longer than any reasonable man ought to. He even cut me a break and chopped my bar tab in half just last week. Don't want him to be stuck cleaning up my mess, or maybe I'm just a selfish prick that only wants to be spared the indignity.
Always thinking of number one. Hell, I probably deserve the indignity, and a whole lot worse. Then, everything got real dark.
I came to on the floor of the stall. I could taste dried vomit on my lips. The bathroom was dark, except the red glow from the bar lighting leaking from underneath the bathroom door. I felt myself over, looking for signs of injury. No broken bones or gashes that I could tell – damn, spoke too soon. I could feel half-dried blood on the front of my shirt and jacket, but that was nothing compared to the wound on the side of my head. Wet, with blood no doubt.
And that's when I remembered the events leading up to me christening the bathroom with the fruit of my delirium tremens, and panic grabbed hold of me. Ashley! I stood up, nearly slipping on my own sickness, and pushed my way out of the stall, groping my way through the darkness to the door.
I stepped out into the bar, which was empty. Jake was gone, the few guys from the soap company drinking in the corner and playing darts were gone, but worst of all, Ash was gone. I had a line of sight to the entrance, and I could see the unsecured door moving gently with the nighttime breeze.
I glanced at the flickering Budweiser clock on the wall behind the bar, the only light source in the whole place – 3:24 a.m. Bars shut down in the city at 2. What in the hell was happening here? I had been out to lunch for close to 5 hours, by my reckoning. And Ash – Ash was gone.
As much as my fear pushed me to hunt for Ash, I needed a drink and I needed one now. I could feel the nausea coming back. I made my way behind the bar and saw that none of the liquor had been locked up. I'd figure out why and square up with Jake later. I grabbed 2 bottles of Jim Beam and stuffed them into my cheap designer jacket, breaking open the stitching to the pockets in the process.
I opened the third bottle of Seagram's Vodka, took as big of a pull as I could manage, and chased it with an open can of orange soda conveniently sitting on the counter. The soda was warm and stale, almost as disgusting as the vodka. I tried to keep it down. Dear God, please let me keep it down. If I can just get a few in me and keep them down, I'll be ok, for a little while at least.
I could feel my stomach trying to rebel, fighting against the vodka, but the warmth was beginning to spread, and I figured I'd probably be able to hold it down. Maybe. In an hour I might feel half normal again, whatever the hell that was.
I had to find Ash. Goddamnit, I didn't dream all this, did I? This wasn't a hallucination, was it? I looked at the bar in front of my stool and saw my wallet, the coins, my key, my business card. If Ash brought anything with her, it left with her, because there was no evidence she had been here.
I walked as quickly as I could manage to the door and stepped out into the night. Looking east and west down the deserted street, all was quiet. Nothing, not even a hobo or a stray cat. Just me, Darryl Willden, the last man on earth, like Charleton Heston. Without thinking I screamed her name. I screamed Ashley's name again and again, and if I got an answer, it came on the whispering breeze of a warm summer night that mocked me for my foolishness.
I took another pull of Seagram's and began to feel a little better, but the anxiety I felt by not being with Ash ensured my comfort was only physical. I had to find Ashley.
I had failed at everything in life. I was failure personified. A failed writer, failed artist, failed cop, failed investigator, and now, failed criminal. I may have failed at everything, but I was going to find Ash.
She gave me a new purpose, a new reason for being, even if it meant dying. And if pursuing her meant falling into a downward spiral in a mad rush to meet my end, at least I'd be with her.
And that was all the motivation this desperado needed.
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2020.04.27 03:27 RegularCookie13 O que é felicidade e/ou satisfação?
Não estou aqui para reclamar ou lamentar na verdade, mas também não tenho a intenção de fazer nenhum post filosófico sobre a busca pela felicidade, mas vamos lá.
Tenho 26 anos, sou casada há 4 anos e tenho bacharel em design (apesar de nunca ter me identificado com a profissão). Pouco antes de casar fui demitida. Algum tempo depois meu marido conseguiu um emprego remoto. Decidimos então nos mudarmos para o interior e ficarmos perto da família dele.
De repente a empresa com quem ele tinha feito um contrato, simplesmente sumiu e não conseguimos mais contato nenhum. Agora estávamos dois designers no interior de São Paulo, sem emprego.
Depois disso, nos mudamos de um apartamento espaçoso por uma casa modesta que a minha sogra tinha disponível para alugar, onde moro até hoje. Até hoje também, fazemos serviços freelancer. Mas não é algo contínuo.
Como não temos como saber se todo mês conseguiremos algum rendimento gastamos o mínimo possível, somente o essencial com comida e contas básicas. NADA supérfluo.
Não vamos viajar, não comemos fora, roupas, maquiagem... nada... Consequentemente não temos motivos para sair de casa. E também não temos carro... (mas ficar em casa nunca foi um problema pra mim, sou bem introvertida e antissocial.)Apesar disso/Por isso, nunca nos faltou nada, não temos dívidas e não recebemos nenhum benefício do governo.
Por outro lado, tenho o melhor marido que alguém poderia ter. Fazemos tudo juntos mas também respeitamos o espaço de cada um, nos entendemos mutuamente e cuidamos um do outro. Ficamos o dia inteiro juntos, todos os dias e não "enjoamos da cara do outro". Somos realmente o casal perfeito há 4 anos e nunca brigamos. Também tenho um gato que sempre faz meu dia melhor.
TL:DR: Não tenho dinheiro algum, mas tenho muito amor. Satisfação e felicidade, não são coisas que possam ser definidas tão facilmente (na minha opinião).
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2020.04.14 12:20 wisewizard My trip to the art gallery
Woke up Saturday morning with the resolve to do acid and go out in public, something i normally Hate doing, i am no good in crowds. I put on my big boy pants, took a quick run at the shops so i'd have supplies for my return, ate two tabs of unknown quality or strength and caught the bus into Sydney. Listened to The Presidents of the USA for the ride in.
[1st hour] Striding from the bus stop to the art gallery through Martin Place feeling like a twelve inch dick and grinning like a crazy person, my head in a real wavy kind of space. i've only really ever tripped out in the bush, at the beach or at home so seeing all the great architecture and the patterns of a city was very cool, every 150 meters there are collections of planter boxs with a patchwork of coloured flowers. Short cut through the hospital. Pandemic? who gives a fuck! There are people eating at the hospital cafe, i find their disregard astounding and accidentally laugh out loud, i get self conscious and leave quickly before someone tries to put me back on the ward.
The Domain is beautiful and i contemplate my place in time as i walk in the shade of giant Morten Bay Fig trees. The gallery awaits, a great sandstone temple on a hill flanked by bronze horsemen.I feel a hiccup of fear, i know inside the shaded entrance there is a man that will judge my worthiness for admittance, at his word my quest could come to a humiliating end and a shameful bus ride home, i am composed, i am steel, i stride right up to the security guard and ask him where the Japanese exhibition is, he points to the very obvious counter with the many hanging banners and line of people, i thank him and walk on victorious. Next i am expected to stand in line for 20 minutes and not fidget or giggle, i am sweating bullets but i have prepared for this, i pull out the small electric fan i bought specially for this expedition, it's shaped like a small grey penguin, i question the wisdom of this choice.
[2nd hour] The ordeal with the line is done with, and i descend towards my target. Japan Supernatural an exhibition of Japanese myths, ghosts and demons. the hallway darkens and paper lanterns light the ceiling, shadow puppet demons fade in and out along the black walls, i pass an alcove that looks like it's the elevators, i pass the gift shop, i pass the toilets, the atmospheric hallway has turned into a noisy cafe.... i have missed the entrance, i turn around and go back the way i came, stopping to wash my face and get my shit together. Onward! The deceitful elevator alcove is now the obvious entrance, i show my ticket and shuffle in. We are packed into the first chamber like tourists waiting for a roller coaster, i hate this, it feels cheap, it takes me five minutes of this shuffling cattle like existence to remember i have free will and freedom of movement, FUCK YOUR LINE, I'LL COME BACK LATER WHEN YOUR ALL DEAD BWAHAHAHA, i leave the herd gathered around the 10ft illustrated scroll and go look at some masks, the second room has another great scroll and less people HOORAH! It's called The night parade of 100 demons, the ink work and the sense of movement is fantastic, i stare at the multitude of weird creatures and their shapes are warping, the visuals are properly starting, a good thing too because in the next room is a mural 50 -60ft long and 10-13ft high done in a riotous graffiti style it's Takashi Murakamis: In The Land of the Dead Stepping on the Rainbows Tail.
I take in the spectacle of the gnarled twisted figures caught in the mass of bold colour until it feels like i've been standing still in the open for too long and it might seem suspicious,"what would the neighbors think if they found out!" i move on to the smaller alcoves and older works so as not to cause a Hurumph. I will take my time here, i will not be rushed off again, this is my house motherfuckers and the things in my house are old and beautiful and worthy of more than just a moments casual consideration, settle, i absorb myself in stories of bird people and river spirits, hellish courtesans contemplating the fleeting nature of youth and beauty, of sly fox women and no bullshit taking samurai. Kusunoki Tamonmaru is vanquishing the old badger with a lantern, chasing him back into the black back ground that at first seemed to be flat dead space but after a proper look reveals a gaggle of hidden demons in subtle dark grey outline. The styles are mostly cartoonish and expressive but there's a sense of rigid dignity to them, a practiced and masterful hand made these things. The spots are appearing on surfaces with little concentration, i don't know how long i've been here for, i sit in front of the rainbows tail again, trapped in the exploding point. the birth of a new universe, each extending line singing, long and deep, ancient vibrations with crystal clarity.
I used to do this all the time. I used to love art. i realize it's been over a decade since i've been in an art gallery and i'm more than a little ashamed with myself, what the fuck have i been doing for the last ten years that was better than this!! i make a mental note to find more acid and visit more galleries, i pull out my phone to make an actual note just in case my memory is fucky. I feel like a monkey with a hammer trying to operate this giant clunky dirty thing, oh god why is my phone so dirty, how'd i never notice that before, man am i sweaty, wheres my penguin? the penguins blades have bent in my pocket and make an obscenely loud thwipping sound in the relative quiet of the gallery, like a chainsaw in the forest, casual as fuck i'm moving on, oh good a dark room to hide in. A repeating movie is playing along the wall, eyes drip dark liquid from their pupil, long dark hair twists like a mobius strip, a white afghan hound with a long feathery tail runs in a perfect circle on a black floor in an infinite brush stroke, i like this place, it's cool and quite and serene but i've seen this movie about four times now, time to mossey. Outside there are staged photos, grim stuff and really well done, there's one of a young girl on the floor cradling a monstrous looking head, trying to shovel food into its mouth, i wonder if this is what teenage mothers feel like during pregnancy. Enough grimness, go back towards the colour.
AhHa! I've found the control room, the core, the beating heart of this thing, it's more Murakami. A mural of a giant white cat officiating a samurai battle is guarded on either side by two 13ft tall yokai weilding clubs,i look up at them and think this is how prey feels, these are the coolest things i've seen in ages, character radiates off these giant resin statues like a cartoon come to life, i pay my respects for fear of my squishy little self and move on to a room that feels like a prison from a movie. It's octagonal and somber with plate glass on each edge, behind each pane is a very old picture, all female it seems, it feels dangerous, a creeping sort of dread, ahh i get it, these are the kind of pictures that steal souls, forewarned is forearmed! I Fear Nothing! and yet
It draws me from the entryway and across the room as surely as gravity, in the other cells are the usual Ring and Grudge type girls with their hollow eyes and black streaky hair but whats got me is something in another league. Tsukioka Yoshitoshis: Ghost, a woman floating side on slightly hunched but noble looking, all in immaculate grey scale except for her eyes which are a serene blue and both stairing right fuckin at me! i get a chill up my back that i'm not sure is from the acid, i break off my gaze and focus on the detail of the fabric which looks textured and rough it's a marvel of technique, it looks like it has substance to it, depth of form and weight,like the picture isn't flat but embossed, it's not something that a photo can really reproduce, this is why you should see art in the flesh ,eventually i drift back to her face and those eyes and What The Fuck is going on with that mouth, she's grinning without emotion but is she also baring her teeth, is she licking her lips, are those even lips or are they caterpillars, my eyes are refusing to focus so i can make out the detail properly, i'm real close to the glass now, forewarned idiot, Hoookay time to nope the fuck out and say goodbye to ghost lady who i've definitely not been thinking about constantly in the weeks since the trip.
Final room and it's mostly modern ghost girl stuff and crowded, i wish i could've seen more of this room but the herd is pushing in again, it's hot, it's noisy with chatter, the snippets of it that come through make me think unkind things, time to go find some chill. Exit through the gift shop, just a quick stop for the art book so i know the things i've seen are real, just a quick stop.....quick....stop...FUCKING LINES!!! Take My Money Annoyed Looking Cashier Girl And Let Us Be Done With Each Other! Find some chill, the one thing i'll say about tourists is they tend to stay on the beaten path, the exhibition right next door is practically empty, it's theme is " In One Drop of Water" after the crush of the gift shop this space feels like a giant pool. Some bored kids play noisily infuriating the impotent security guard, a few couples stand close and whisper to each other, i plop down on a bench like a pile of wet clay and breath this place in, it's all very lovely and calm, it all has to do with water, my natural element, this is a good place. i sit and listen to abalone divers sing a traditional song in a language i don't recognize but i listen to the chorus of female voices for a long time, i'm not sure if the song is on an uninterrupted loop or if it's just really long, doesn't matter, it's beautiful. The penguin has returned and we go to look at more pretty things, there's a green ceramic bust of a man meditating covered in lily pads, like he was in the pond for so long they grew around him, yeah this guy gets it. A epic hanging tapestry shows a sea dragon fucking up some ships, i wish i'd kept in practice with my drawing. Something to remember for later.
The cafe is quieter now , hmm should i eat? why, are you hungry or is it just the correct designated eating time? ... i dunno. Then the answer is obvious. Fuck that noise? Fuck that noise. To The Esca-la-tor!! People die on escalators, not like A Lot but it happens, i bet none of them ever thought they'd be the ones to become that statistic, i bet it's cos their shoes got stuck, what kind of shoes am i wearing again? then again maybe they lost balance and fell because they were staring at their shoes, hand rail.
Giant black and white photos of....stuff, what stuff? can't say, there's a chaotic pattern in it and the visuals are reeeal fuckin bendy now but what the fuck it is......... oh, it's random stuff behind wet glass, the pattern is water droplets, hehe neat, Beeennddddy. goon. Ooo more rooms, More black and white, everything here is to do with shadows, Some of it's a bit too brain thinky for me right now, but the shadows cast interesting patterns across the walls and the visuals are cool as hell, it's like being in the negative zone, i do find one thing i think's a bit profound, a thing in a tiny frame it says something to the effect of
"Secure first the shadow lest you lose the light"
daaaamn, is that deep? i dunno, what's the blurb say? it says... that this was the slogan of an old camera film company, the thing in the frame is packaging. so it's advertising? yup. kinda takes some of the shine off it don't it. yup. maybe that's the point of it being here. what's the point? dunno, to ask the question? hmmm make a note of it and mull it over later, urrgggh dirty pocket brick comes out again. Lets go see some colour. Yesssss! Had this in the back of my mind all day. More death stairs into the bowels of the gallery! To the Indigenous art section.
If your not familiar with it Australian Aboriginal art is great for tripping, It's a lot of earthy contrasting colours, whites, browns, red ochres, blacks. Done in a dot pattern style that often repeats but has a wandering improvised very natural vibe, it feels like life seen under a microscope or if you had xray eyes and could zoom in on muscle tendons and cells while they're still at work in the body.If you've ever seen video of blood moving through arteries you get what i mean. I'm giddy watching the patterns churn and the dots climb the walls. i'm sitting 10ft from a security guard stareing at one piece for what feels like too long, i don't give a shit if i look suspicious this is too fuckin cool.
Ascension, and a quick look at this years top student works. Holy shit when did teenagers get talented?! There's some damn cool stuff here, there's also families so mind ya P's & Q's . there's a huge black web of what i think is extruded plastic like from a 3d printer pen, it's ruffled like a shower curtain so the picture in the pattern is unclear and shifts depending on where you stand, there's clearly an eye (move left) ..on a face (forward) ...of an old woman (diagonal right, mind the kids) ... and she's... giving me the finger?! What The Hell Man!!! There's some cool Kintsugi teapots that are growing little ceramic flowers from the repaired cracks, there's a bunch of other stuff i'd like to study more closely but i feel time slipping and the families are makin me nervous, besides there's the final wing to get to yet.
These are the guys they call Masters. i've seen a lot today, cool stuff, interesting stuff, thought provoking and soul nourishing, but this, feels, holy, like things out of legend. There's a vibration shift when you enter this place, there's a trepidation to start with, like a mouse before the mighty, but it quickly passes and you get it, you are welcome here, this is the house of a friend and while there are certain rules you are expected to abide by you are welcome at the hearth to share wine and bread. This is the oldest wing of the gallery, part of the original building before it began it's expansion down the hill side, the ceilings are high and decorated with patterned cornices, columned archways divide the sections of the wing, the floor boards are old and creak as if to reprimand you for hurrying through too quickly and not giving these works their due. It's not all to my taste but even the things i think are less striking radiate with a powerful energy, i'm absorbed in the slaughter of old soldiers putting up an obviously futile defense trapped in their killing box inside a burning village, it's all rendered in beautiful detail and a masterwork but it's in a massive gaudy golden frame that adds another 2ft on each side to it's already large size and it makes the dimensions of the picture as a whole object look like a thing that belongs on the mantle or night stand of some giant grandma and i wonder if this was an intentional choice by the artist, to make it seem trivial or mundane, commenting on how we treat those that suffer for us, like the sacrifice of the men in the picture is just something you can chuck on some empty space in your house and reminisce about if it happens to catch your eye.
Moving on to a flawless white marble statue of a man fighting a serpent, it's perfectly unnatural and a wonder. Nature for all its beauty can't do this, only mankind can. it's a thing too fragile and purposeful to exists anywhere but here. A colossal canvas of a gilded queen in some ancient court, the sheer scope of it, the detail is astounding, how do you even start something like this, i could've spent the whole day just in front of this one picture and still feel like i hadn't seen all it has to offer. My heart is breaking for 3 angelic children in a roman slave market when i sense the security guard approaching. Nooo can't be, i was so careful. The Gallery is closeing, please make your way towards the exit. !... really? oh wow it's 5:30, i've been here for almost 7 hours. we are being patiently herded out. I feel pangs of disappointment as we're move too fast through unexplored rooms. Spoilt, consider all you saw today.That's true we saw some cool stuff. And the Gallery is going nowhere. There will be other days. I emerge happily into the warm afternoon sun, the Gallery might be closeing but there's still a lot of day left. i recline on the sandstone steps leaning against a column and watch the clouds twist and boil in the blue afternoon sky above the needle points of the skyscrapers, i remember my green friend in the pond with the lilys, Serenity, that's what this feeling is, no demands, no obligations, a perfect moment.
[Hour 8?9?] Practicality politely intrudes, we are still a long way from home and i have no desire to be here after dark. Orders are given, the engines fire, the music swells and the ancient automaton rumbles back to life. eons of rust flaking off it's joints as it rises from it's slumber and plods a course back across the park. I come to the edge where the buildings begin. Huh, an interesting idea pops into my head, back the way we came in? to sit at a dirty cold bus stop with depressed people in suits ....or?
Air - Moon Safari comes on in my ears as i head down the hill towards the harbour and the ferry wharf, a tense walk past a line of cop cars and a somewhat awkward interaction with a ticket girl i'm privileged to be witness to a breathtaking sight. Sydney Harbor from the water bathed in the golden light of the setting sun. if you ever happen to visit my city i can not recommend enough that you do this, take the ferry from Manly or Circular Quay and see why this is known as one of the worlds most beautiful harbors. The lush Botanical Gardens along the foreshore, the armada of yachts crowding every cove, the city skyline backlit by the sun, the great shells of The Opera House, the towering Harbor Bridge, the majesty of human creation on display. In the quay today a towering cruise liner sits docked, bigger than an apartment block, a marvel of engineering, every line and detail considered and pained over from it's proud wave conquering bow along it's mighty super structure to the giant yellow jumping castle on its stern.... I break down laughing, it is not subtle, people are looking, i just lean back in my seat and grin, it's like god flicked my ear, don't take shit so serious bruv just enjoy.
I'm on the outside of the ferry in the seats faceing the ocean, there's a fair bit of water traffic, fishing boats and party barges, million dollar yachts and putt putts that look like they run on kerosene. On the far shore are suburbs i've never visited and couldn't name but i'm told that's where the rich people live, they've got a nice view, but right now mine is better, it's like the whole hillside is covered in molten gold with thousands of gems reflecting the light. The word of the day is "Sonder" i'm pretty sure it's a made up word but it's a perfect fit right now, a thousand golden houses, a hundred thousand bejeweled windows, and in each of them a person living a charmed life full of love and strife and pets and mortgages and afternoon BBQs and too much champagne and harsh words and forgiveness and soccer practice and secret affairs , it all seems so wonderful and mundane, the whirring gears of humanity, the vista seems limitless and their actions numerous but so finite and then the suburbs begin to fail replaced by desperate mansions scattered like the last bastions of civilization on the edge of the crumbling earth and all at once they're gone and all that's left is the great void of the open ocean.
We're passing the heads that lead out of the harbour, the swell has picked up and the ferry turns at a diagonal to better ride the peaks and troughs and for the first time i consider seriously the warning signs posted all around me, Caution slippery surface, Warning you may get wet, Dangerous in rough weather, a little black stick figure is plummeting over a rail to a grissley fate, but i'd be ok i was swimming before i could walk, Are You Fuckin Kiddin Man! it's a kilometer and a 1/2 to shore and you get winded walkin a flight of Fuckin steps Don't even THINK about going in that water You Will Fuckin Die! i cautiously peek down over the side, a dark green endless ancient and uncaring thing stares back at me, a thing filled with sharks and Krakens and a billion souls of dead mariners. Way out near the headland a motor boat is towing 4 small sailing boats on a line, they're so small they could only be meant for children, what the hell kind of reckless bastards are sailors, who the hell would be out here by choice, ...... , oh right, Amor Fati. The ferry dips and rises but doesn't crash and go down with all hands, the northern headland and it's great stratified cliffs are a comfort, everything we are is a blip in the great flow of time, your death will be unremarkable regardless of where it happens, so be cool ok. oooo more pretty houses.
[Hour: who cares i'm tired and want to go lie down] Manly Wharf, busy with the beginnings of night life and the stragglers of the day, families, drunks, tourists, blow-ins, party people,suits, tradies, all of em in my goddamn way, Dip, Dodge, Duck, Dive ,Nope bad idea, stick to Dodge, and finally a bus. It's full of drunk teenagers, they are abrasive, like a cheese grater, all hair and teeth. Weird i don't remember when the music stopped, Daft Punk- RAM to block out the noise and Sudduko so i don't have to make eye contact, Home driver, there is animated movies and garlic bread waiting for me. Murakami Ghost More Japanese stuff Aboriginal, Student and classic
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2020.04.05 09:06 NocheDeRonda Abrazos.
"Si el agua fuese belleza, tú serías el océano entero."
basic information. Name: Maya Esperanza Amores, more known as Perry Amores. Godrent: Erato, muse of erotic poetry. Age: 16, born on the 22nd of June, 2004. Hometown: Salento, Quindio; Colombia. Mortal Parent(s): Andrés Amores (deceased), Samuel Figueroa (step-father) Sibling: Javier Figueroa (half-brother, son of Terpsichore; deceased)
"Si tus ojos fueran el cielo y tu boca el mar, me gustaría ser el horizonte para poderte besar."
appearance. Overall: If radiance was a person, it would be Perry. Her gentle personality matched her pleasing features. From the meek manner her eyebrows reach to each other in worry to the subtle and natural growth of the curl at each end of her plump lips. She smiles because she's content; she smiles because she needs to; she smiles because, at times, she knows nobody else would if she didn't. Her mere gaze could establish many things and looking into them, they talk way more than she does. Hair: Caramel hair, loose but tight ringlets, darker in the roots splaying to the ends a shade lighter, served as a frame to her diamond-shaped face. They cascaded down her shoulders with a graceful cadence in volumes close to frothy ocen waves. Her locks were a hue that complemented her sun-kissed skin. Eyes: Golden, like honey; timeless, like amber. Physique: Perry had a dancerly poise about her as a result of her four year streak crowned as Reina Salsa Júnior in a local salsa contest during ages 8 to eleven. Fortunately, she carried her love for dance, driven by her brother's influence, through her teenage years. By age twelve to thirteen, she was an enthusiastic participant of the Cali World Salsa Festival. She joined the Queens High School Cheer Team by fourteen to present. Height: 5'6", 123 lbs. Style: Of course, dressing for comfort is a must. Her idea of comfort was defined by t-shirts, jeans, and sneakers. Pretty practical, except on days where she doesn't plan to do anything physical where she would rather look cute in a flowy floral dress and a pair of sandals. Accesorizing wasn't her cup of tea but she never forgets to wear a certain watch. A gift from Javi.
"Ojalá la mitad de las estrellas brillaran tanto como tus ojos."
personality. Overall: Anyone who knows her would have her personality written down in three words: sweet, friendly, caring. That was about it. It summed up what she was willing to show people. She was good at hiding things an controlling her own emotions. Despite this, her obsession with tiny details and her constant search for a distraction were hard to hide. She was a warm hug. Her whole existence was a warm hug. Comforting, tight, welcoming. People don't see each other's faces in hugs. Positive: Perry is a loyal friend and a natural spirit-lifter. Her energy was either the encouraging sunshine or the tranquil moonlight. She was born to be around people. She had a knack for making people feel loved and that itself was poetry enough. Negative: While her aura did attract many to want to know her, she was rather reserved. She could listen to other people's problems and offer them the comfort they need while she would almost never ask for anything in return.
Fun Fact???: She's supremely good at flirting. Unintentionally, on ocassion.
"Crees en amor a primera vista, o debo pasarte otra vez?"
other stuff. Powers:
Camp History: She went to Camp Half-Blood during her younger years from age twelve to fourteen and was amiable with a lot of the campers, so chances of knowing her or even merely recognizing her was not too impossible. She used to attend with her brother Javi who was two years older than her. This year, she goes alone.
- Emotion Detection: Perry bears the ability to detect one's emotions, especially ones driven by love. She can detect this through a normal conversation. While others may bear the ability as a social skill, even in the midst of argument, love can be more tangible than anger.
- Love Inducement: With the power of her guitar and her talented digits, any poem sung by her dulcet tones could easily be a love song. In every lyric lies a tiny lullaby, rocking even the coldest of hearts to feel even just a little amor.
- Chlorokinesis: Her powers over plant control revolve around one flower—the rose. This gives her the ability to control any species of Rosa and grant them rapid and healthy growth.
Propertius, Elegies 3. 3 (trans. Goold) (Roman elegy C1st B.C.): "The nine Maidens, each allotted her own realm, busy their tender hands on their separate gifts : . . . another [Erato] with both hands plaits wreaths of roses [i.e. the flower of love]." (https://www.theoi.com/Ouranios/MousaErato.html)
"Pasas tanto tiempo en mi mente, debería cobrarte el alquiler."
present. "That doesn't... sound right." Perry furrowed her brows, a sheepish chuckle escaping her as she lowered her head to a camper's poorly tuned guitar. She sat on the porch of a random cabin, waiting outside for an old camper she wanted to surprise before going and unpacking in her own designated residence. Her fingers turned the keys, strumming string after string once the right adjustment was made.
OOC: Just say "Aye" if you'd wanna be one of her old camp buddies! :D Credits to the artist Manweri for the f/c. Check 'em out on deviantart!
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2020.02.24 02:43 ItsaTurkey trying to stop thinking about and watching video games, mostly a generic rant but u kno. Also I read manga and watch sakuga animation and listen to too much music instead of studying like a madman since I'm in a bonkers program rip.
Better than a thousand meaningless statements, is one meaningful word, which, having been heard, brings peace.– Dhammapada 100 (translated by Gil Fronsdal)
Faker, who is this guy, he comes out of nowhere and solo kills king of the mid-lane Ambition. LOOK AT THE CLEANSE. All aboard the Korean hype train! LOOK AT THE MOVES! tightened scrotum. *angery dubstep noises* The camera pans over the high school dropouts. Shoutcasters cast passionately about these attractive but amoral zoomer-millenials.
On a dark and stormy night, Lee Sang-hyeok picked up a mouse and keyboard and the author came into life.
*11 years later*
boi imma play some runescape omergerd. kill sheeps. *TRADE OFFER FROM BIGBOI99* FREE STUFF MY DUDE. ahahah LOOK AT THIS SARADOMIN GODSWORD, NOT JUST A WHITE KNIGHT BLADE.. take my abyssal whip.
the boi wakes up, shimata that nightmare again. He goes to a drug dealer's house. Hey, wanna have some fun? Dorothy-BBY: Welcome to our live chat with the creative minds of Riot Games who developered League of Legends. Please feel free to post your questions!
RiotGames: Hey guys! It's a pleasure to be here. We currently have Marc Merrill (President), Tom Cadwell (Design Director), Steve Snow (VP of Production), and Steve Mescon (Community Director) here to answer your questions.
Guest-11: When is the release date?RiotGames: League of Legends is scheduled to be released on October 6th.
Guest-16: Some of the characters like Ryze are slightly OP at the moment. Once you get stunned there is no way you get away. Or if you do you are at 1% HP. Also what is being done for afk players and leavers? Thank you PaulRiotGames: Tom Cadwell: Balance is of course very important to us. It takes a lot of time and iteration to "get right" but we definitely understand the importance. Regarding your question about leavers - in addition to the more advanced reconnect feature that we rolled out recently, there are a number of things that we're going to be moving onto the beta servers in the next few weeks that should help significantly. I can't reveal a lot of details right now, but we look forward to sharing the specifics with you when the time comes.
Jabe: Can you give us some teasers about new maps in the works?RiotGames: Tom Cadwell: The most important map that we're working on right now is a new user tutorial map. We're also working on a smaller map that will support 3v3/4v4 team sizes better.
Guest-19: Is LoL using a proprietary game engine or a licensed engine?RiotGames: Marc Merrill: League of Legends is being built using both a proprietary game engine and a proprietary platform designed specifically for this type of game.
Guest-24: Are there going to be new maps added to the beta when it becomes open?RiotGames: Tom Cadwell: We aren't planning on releasing new maps specifically with open beta - but we definitely plan on adding plenty of different maps and new game modes over time .
Guest-5: What are the plans for how Influence Points will affect the game?RiotGames: Influence points are earned at the account level by playing individual sessions. Players will be able to use their influence points to purchase Runes, Champions & Skins, and other things that allow you to tailor your gameplay experience to your likeness.
Guest-51: Will current beta testers keep their current accounts go live?RiotGames: Regarding users keeping their beta accounts - Pendragon: Summoner level, IP, Runes, etc will definitely be reset. Our aim is for beta testers to be able to keep their actual accounts and names once the game goes live. No promises though!
He's not the guy, I am. "Nothing is unwinnable".
Middle school was where boys became real men in the most hardest game of all time, league of legends. Boys enjoyed clicking endlessly whilst their dads left them because of their mediocrity; however, that went an unseen blade, for they were naive. There was 100 years of peace and then the hippocampus... Seid ihr das Essen?Nein, wir sind der Jäger!
(Feuerroter Pfeil und Bogen)
Fumareta hana no Namae mo shirazu niChi ni ochita tori wa Kaze wo machiwabiru
The TITANS, THEY'RE COMING AHHHHH. Ah, yes the flesh, sear it, savor its taste... OH KAMISAMA THIS IS OUR DIVINE PUNISHMENT.
*3 years later*
Where am i, who am i? Secondary learning? Yes mon ami, tu est dans le location pour etudier et il y n'a pas jeux de videos. what is this ib diploma, volunteering, ahahahah? I'm diamond, you cannot hurt me filthy casuals, *right hand moves rapidly in the air with clawing motions*. Click, click, the sounds of idiocy. Through the mist... in comes the speeding train of death and a shovel drops off. But mother, this cannot be, I am the king of top lane, the mastermind of their fates. The boy takes the steel spade and firmly grasps it. We all want to quickly get somewhere, that's why the 6 minute abs are so powerful. Imagine there was a four lane highway, and we all want to take it. We always step over the fucking shovel, I made my own path and suffered. I suffered a lot. Being called n***** every day and you know being bullied, I couldnt lie to myself anymore. KAMEHAMEHAAAAAA, I WILL CHANGE MY FATE, I WILL DESTROY MY CHAINS skeletons buried FLY OUT . Twisting endlessly AND CONTORTING HIS BODY YES I WILL BECOME EDUCATED... And with both of us together, then, of course, we could possibly do it in, um... oh, eight years. Oh, does something else demand your time? Some pressing appointment, perhaps? In return for your help, I offer something priceless. My freedom? No, freedom can be taken away, as you well know. I offer knowledge, everything I have learned. I will teach you, oh, economics, mathematics... - Philosophy, science. - To read and write? Of course. When do we start? I got it. I got it. Lights out. Lights. - Let's have 'em. Come on. - The slot opens twice a day. Once for your toilet bucket, which is where we hide the dirt.*2 years later* the manly man swigs some lemonade. A hard day's work; sour yet sweet. Snow surrounds him while he drinks the cold beverage, he is prepared with his defenses. Torch light illuminates his contraption. We call it the shatterdome. RESET The cLOCK. Overconfidence is a slow and insidious killer. "DEMACIA!"
who said that? Hey, ___, there's a lol tournament with a preeze in the district wannaa go seeeee.????? Garen, the might of addiction. This secondary learning institution attended by the man-child was holding a big gathering of enthusiast time splurgers. There must be an extravagant sendoff for his wasted childhood. After winning it, rains of blood and tears of virgin women will announce my ascension into the upper realms. The fog of war was thick. In the beating drums of war: tryouts with the French language teacher-coach, missed learning opportunities and time to truly relax the anima, and finally the author places onto a noble team: they would represent the Technical Institute, five who had no real friends, nor integration into society, but nonetheless represented the learning institution like the outcasts Japan. Of course, being an addicted, er, highly dedicated rookie, the opponents fell like flies to the stacking immortal hound, Nasus. Q.Q.Q.Q.Q.Q.Q.Q. + 12. Click. Q.Q.Q.Q.Q.Q.QQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQ+12QQQQQQQ..... QQQQQQQQQQQ... Q. HAHA THE CYCLE OF LSiphon the red crystal. Ecstasy. *heavy panting* *oofffoofofof* After the dust settles emerges the bountiful 25 dollars, wonderful. It was not a waste, these great warriors I have met were worth the effort of traversing my kingdom. It was a mighty crusade, brethren, although you seem quite untraditional the warrior with your shortness of breath. XXDusk left the game: the best top laner in his grand academy goes away. Back to fight Philippe II for England. He was never seen again on the rift.
*several weeks later*
Look at the cleanse, look at the moves! Faker what was that? Faker with a huge outplay on to Ryu, I almost couldn't see that, the qss, the deathmark. He totally just won that duel oh my god, the nerves he mustve been shaking XPEKE STUCK IN THERE AND BACKDOORED THE NEXUS. FAKER FAKER PLAYMAKER. 20 minute surrender on. FAKER HAS NEVER LOST ON LEBLANC. LOOK AT THE CLEANSE. Waow.. oh wait, should I not be working? No, this is fun, I get to relax, somehow. mathematical studies 227. Praise Faker's greatness, he will teach the way to live; He possesses an untapped knowledge. Worlds 2019 arrives, where the least healthy males fight. TO BE THE KING YOU GOTTA BEAT THE KING, FAKER STILL LIES AHEAD * GLASSES ADJUSTMENT * *POUTING POSE* *HANDS IN POCKET GUY* *MAN WALKING VERY SLOWLY TOWARDS THE CAMERA WITH A STOIC FACE AND CROSSING HIS ARMS BECAUSE HE CANT ACTUALLY DO ANYTHING IN REAL LIFE ALL WE GET TO SEE IS SOME HIGHLIGHT MONTAGES OF THIS MAN PLAYING A FUCKING VIDEO GAME CHARACTER AND THEN THE MAKEUP ARTISTS DO THEIR THING BUT REALLY THEY ALL ARE KIND OF SCREWED IN TERMS OF APPLICABLE SKILLS* See, I knew he would become great again. PHOENIX RISE RISE. MAKE THEM REMEMBER YOU ARISSSSEEEEE. MAKE THEM ADDICTED TO LOL RISEEEE RISEE. PICK UP YOUR PSYCHIDELICS AND RIIIISEEEE. I'm going to watch all of his games like a promiscuous Chinese prostitute in Peking. While invested, time to watch the other groups. Who is Huni? He went undefeated in 2015 EU LCS. HE'S A MONSTER, HES GONNA KILL EVERYONE OH MY GOD. LOOK AT SWORD AHAHAH CV MAX OH BOI SWORD U DUN FUCKED UP OH MY GOD. OMG. *1 month later* BANG IS COMING FAKER'S SHOCKWAVE WILL FIND THEM ALL. SKT LEGENDS FOR A REASON, FIND THEIR WIN. YOU CAN NEVER COUNT SKT OUT, NO MATTER WHAT, I HAVE TALKED TO MULTIPLE ANALYSTS ABOUT THIS TEAM, NEVER BET AGAINST SKT. THEY SEEM TO HAVE SOME SORT OF MYSTERIOUS POWER. SSG QUALIFY FOR A REMATCH WITH SK TELECOM. PLAYERS TO WATCH: CUVEE CROWN, HUNI FAKER. TAKE A LOOK AT THAT AGGRESSIVE TOP LANE STYLE FROM HUNI AND YOU KNOW LAST YEAR, THEY WERE THE FAVOURITES TO WIN BUT NOW SKT SEEMS TO BE PLAYING OFF-META WHEREAS SSG ARE COMFORTABLE. THE SK TELECOM DYNASTY IS OVER, ALL HAIL THE NEW KINGS, SAMSUNG GALAXY, YOUR 2017 WORLD CHAMPIONS. 1 YEAR WAITING, FIGHTING TO GET BACK TO THIS STAGE, AND THEY DEFEAT SK TELECOM ON THE BIGGEST STAGE.*2 months later*FAKER IS PART OWNER OF SKT. UH AHAHSUHAUHSDAHSD . 227宿題はフェイカーの助けを借りて行われます、私は彼のためにここまで来ました. 私は偽の千里子が大好. ITS NOT MY FAULT I CAN'T PERFORM because it's impossible. More coffee, but the boymanchild shudders. He looks at his walls and his schedule book. "duh work on dream project make money and be healthier" I'll do it eventually, need anime power plus six-pack and chiseled jaw. Hey guys mike here, today we're gonna be doing an ez workout for Faker, DO YOU KNOWS da waE? His memories swirl around the orb of existence, the schedules fall into the night. Stars, stars everywhere, and then people leaving, people having fun with each other. I work so hard, right Faker? You believe in me! I toil, ah if only I wasn't born so unblessed I could go anywhere, it's not that I suck or anything, I am anxious. A shape emerges from the canvas... Buddha? i work so hard, I just wish somebody would recognize my effort you know, and THOSE PEOPLE NEVER GET ANYTHING DONE, BIG WHOOP U LITTLE SNOWFLAKE. ⠀⠀⠀⠴⢿⣧⣤⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⣿⣧⣆⣘⡄⢹⣿⣷⣆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⢿⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⠀⣴⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⡀⣾⡿⠀⠉⠉⠛⠋⠛⠛⠚⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢠⣍⠹⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⣷⣾⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⣟⢻⣿⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠻⠿⠟⠁⠑⢶⣤⣴⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣬⣿⣿⣿⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⠛⠛⢛⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠻⢿⡿⠟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀"You have not accepted the inevitable suffering of existence."
QuestionWhat is the most destructive organ in the human body?What is the most helpful organ in the human body?AnswerThe tongue (along with the lips, lungs, teeth and vocal chords)
Talking is our primary mode of interacting with each other. Speaking with care is the most effective tool we have for cleaning up our inner life and making our relationships better.
Words can connect and heal people and can also alienate and harm people. Words often produce powerful, lasting effects on both the speaker and the listener. Sometimes those effects are unintended, but if your words are well chosen, they can bring peace to you and others.
Whether you are aware of it or not, every word you say has the potential to ease or afflict yourself and others. Spoken or written words, sign language, and non-verbal expressions – which are all forms of speech – shape our relationsh. Capitalism has screwed me over stupid BUSH. The major shareholders have swindled the money off the proletariat. The real wage has been steadily decreasing for the last forty years we need to build a .
Richard Wolff: I think the way this one began really takes us at least back to the 1970s. Something happened in the 1970s, kind of everyone agrees that the capitalists in the United States and other parts of the world made a fundamental decision to change course. They were no longer going to stay in the parts of the world where capitalism had grown up: Western Europe, North America and Japan. They were going to leave. They were going to go to places where they could produce at a much lower wage level for workers, and I'm thinking here of China, India, Brazil, places like that. And they were only going to stay in their old countries under the new conditions of pressing down the wages, getting the government to cut taxes on them, basically under the threat that if you don't do what we want where we were born, even more of us will be leaving and going elsewhere.
This put the country into a vice. It didn't know how to react, the politicians were afraid to offend these corporations. Meanwhile the corporations became richer and richer, precisely because they were paying low wages around the rest of the world. And you have a crisis building because the rich are becoming richer and richer, they...
It was a solution and it did work for a while. But you know, we were a small ex colony at that time. We were not a major player in the world economy the way Britain and Western Europe were. Now we are the colossus of the world economy. And things you can do when you're a small corner, you can't do if you're the Big Kahuna on the beach.
For example, if you were actually to see the United States today try to put a wall of tariffs around itself, one of the first things you'd notice really quickly would be that the rest of the world's countries would do exactly the same against the United States. So while we would celebrate having more jobs because we don't let foreign goods come in, we would also have to commiserate with one another for all the lost jobs here because we can't export to those countries. They're not all going to sit down and play by the rule book that advantages the United States at their expense. The Chinese aren't going to do it and the Europeans aren't going to do it, and the Japanese are not going to do it...
Second example. The instability I just spoke about. What kind of a system is this that plunges down every four to seven years? And then periodically plunges down in a horrific way that makes hundreds of millions of people suffer even though their skill at production is unchanged, even though their needs are, if anything, growing. That we stumble over ourselves, the instability, the inequality, those should be more than enough to have as signs that this is a system which for most of us is not working...
UND KEINE SASONDERN UNSERE JEW-RIDDEN DEMOCRACIES, DIE NUR IN TERMS OF CAPITALISM DENKEN KÖNNEN, KÖNNEN, DASS, WENN EIN STAAT DIE MASCHINE ZU EINEM ANDEREN STAAT ES DOMISIERT, DASS ANDERE STAAT. IN ACTUAL FACT SUCH DOMINATION, IF IT OCCURS, CAN BE ONLY A RECIPROCAL DOMINATION.
Es ist vermutlich einfacher, ohne Maschinen als ohne Lebensmittel und Rohstoffe zu sein. Folglich scheint der Partner, der Rohstoffe und Lebensmittel benötigt, stärker gebunden zu sein als der Empfänger von Industrieerzeugnissen. BEI DIESER TRANSAKTION GAB ES WEDER EROBERER NOCH EROBERT. ES GAB NUR PARTNER
You have to face that this is now a world capitalist system that has boxed itself into a dead end which is why I stress, even though it is scary, that we really now have to ask a question. Capitalism has collapsed twice in the last 75 years: first in the 1930s, and now we have 2008. Between those two we had 11 economic downturns. That's the measure of the National Bureau of Economic Research which keeps those records here in the United States. The instability of this system coupled with the decision to maximize profits by going overseas to exploit low wage workers has put us into a situation where even when we solve the problems we have, the solution leads to the next net of problems that are even worse.
This is the time when the question about the viability of the system should be debated forefront. We have an election for president where the two candidates, if you can say anything about them, is they share the evasion of this question. The refusal to question this system, to debate almost anything other than asking whether this system is now dysfunctional for the mass of people, profitable for a few, but that's not the basis for longevity. That was what was experienced by other systems in the past and we need to ask those questions about our system now...
Born a corpse, there was no destiny of greatness. I must investigate my spiritual inner core by reading gender-bend manga. Hello darkness my old friend. Is this my fate, to be this weak, old, frail youngster. To eternally envy the gifts bestowed upon others while writhing in this puddle of mud? No, I must go beyond into the starlight and seek it, the eternal. Shinji, get in the robot.Cold sweat beads on his forehead, the author wakes up. Was that the universe, am I Buddha now? Beep beep. Written assigment due in 4 hours. Oh shit, well maybe I should just start, and see where this goes. *fades into the sunset*. music... ears hurt... different music.... instrumental.... Japanese.... western... ambient... white noise... damnnit these headphones suck..... ouch EI DIESER TRANSAKTION GAB ES WEDER EROBERER NOCH EROBERT. ES GAB NUR PARTNER... you know what fuck this I'm watching Faker.No, NONO NO NONDONSOANDOANSODNAOSDNADONAOThe author wakes up. Carl? Carl!? Get over here, the walkers are coming in! M4A1-S coming up 30/120. hit em in the head.*grrr* A swiper swipes at him 24/120. Another one. 11/120. And another one 5/120. Tactical reload. 30/90 Carl, as he runs from his resting place underneath the dilapidated car into the prison building sees Richard I of England. "Richard?" Slowly, the man turns around. The hollow shell of the Lionheart faced the boy, now grown up into a neckbeard. ""GRRDSGRR"! "AH! No, what happened to Richard?" Carl slept for too long, it was time to end it. Cocking the pistol at him, he fires it twice in the head. It's dead now. It can't hurt me. In the distance, more agitated roars swarm the building. DEUS VULT! oh, boy, this cant be happening, this cant be happening... Trapped. in the middle of nowhere. with spongebob and zombified crusaders. I'll have to scare them away from Jerusalem. The cult of the holy lance! The battle of jaffa, saladeeen, im coming to get uuuu.
PC after a 16 hour gaming binge: you can rest now.
The author rests now .
Wait a minute. The author wakes up. *Men in black show up*. Oh no, it's faker. "You know too much" Oh god, the phone booth there it is! If i can only get to it. The author dodges bullets with his powers ah theres a speeding train of death! So close!
I unconsciously swallowed my saliva as I watched the scene unfold before my eyes.
A deep husky voice called out my name.
Its owner was lying sprawled out on the bed.
The firelight glowed in the dimly lit room, illuminating his inhumanly beautiful face .
He was in possesion of flawless pale skin, a lean and elegant figure, and a delicately sculpted face which bore a sweet captivating smile presently.
At first glance, he looked no different from usual.
However, his eyes were absolutely alluring.
His ordinarily piercing clear purple eyes were hazy, and the faint reddish tinge that flushed those snow white cheeks belied traces of excitement.
This seemingly dangerous man was my husband, the Duke of the Empire, ‘Zahid El- Carnor.’
Zahid smile languidly and beckoned me.
Goosebumps quickly broke out on my neck.
Just like a prey when faced with a predator, my instincts were beseeching me to run away far from here.
However, I fought to suppress my fearful instincts and gradually made my way towards him.
I walked as slowly as I could, but the distance to the bed was too short. It was merely a few steps away.
He caught me and pulled me down onto the bed.
His large hands grabbed me by the waist.
Perhaps it was due to my bundle of nerves, that my skin felt overly sensitive as his hot breath washed over it.
My head was getting foggy from the heat rising within my body.
Zahid tugged me closer, hugging me.
“Kiss me, Ertha.”
Talking comes naturally to most people. Sometimes it’s as if we don’t really know what we think until we’ve produced words on a particular subject – “thought out loud”. But how can we make sure our speech is worthwhile, and not just blather? Without a bit of silence woven into the conversation, there’s no time to think, to hear, or to connect. Filling our surroundings with continuous noise generates a nervous and uncomfortable urgency. It’s a way of blocking out reflective thinking, and it wears out both the speaker and the listener. Allowing for silence invites listening, thoughtful speech, absorption of what’s said, and contemplation.
I took a break from gaming to improve my life and then came back when faker came into my utube recommendations then i couldnt stop thinking about lol. Since then, I've been taking uni courses and am struggling.
submitted by ItsaTurkey
to StopGaming [link] [comments]
2020.02.23 14:55 raphacomph Percepção de valor
O que vem na sua cabeça no momento em que eu lhe pergunto: O que é valor?
Ao ir em uma loja, e perguntar o valor de algo, provavelmente você terá como resposta um valor monetário. Ao ir em uma reunião de negócios, o valor poderá ser uma referência de aceitação do produto ou serviço.
O valor de um produto ou serviço está muito além do custo em reais. Algo que para um pode ser caro, para outro pode ser barato, a percepção está no "valor" que a pessoa atribui aquele item. Vejamos dois exemplos:
A Harley Davidson está no mercado há mais de um século, e não possui a moto mais rápida, ecológica ou com melhor design, entretanto possui milhares de fãs que pagam pela marca e por sua exclusividade.
O Rolex também há mais de um século no mercado é sinônimo de precisão, qualidade, charme e beleza, e com estas características se tornou a maior e mais cobiçada marca de relógio do mundo.
O que ambas tem em comum?
O valor percebido pelo cliente, nos casos citados os consumidores sabem que pagarão caro por ter algo com uma percepção de valor alta, porem isto não lhes afeta.
Desta forma, podemos entender que o valor percebido é intrínseco.
Agora se eu lhe perguntar: Qual o SEU valor?
Com base no estudo acima, se o valor é algo intrínseco, e somente quem realmente sabe o valor de algo paga por ele, eu posso lhe afirmar que o seu valor é altíssimo, pois independente de quem você é, ou o que fez, o maior valor possível foi pago por você "Porque Deus amou o mundo de tal maneira que deu o seu Filho unigênito, para que todo aquele que nele crê não pereça, mas tenha a vida eterna. (João 3:16
Somente quem conhece o real valor de algo, é capaz de pagar um alto preço, e assim Deus fez por mim e por você, quando em uma cruz, entregou o seu filho por amor a nós, para que tivéssemos vida.
submitted by raphacomph
to u/raphacomph [link] [comments]
2020.01.21 14:05 AgenciaSolution 👑 Invista em Marketing - Orçamento Sem Compromisso (35)98825-8100
2020.01.19 02:31 Rubens322 Benefícios do Sexo Para Manter a Saúde do Corpo em Geral
| || | submitted by Rubens322 to u/Rubens322 [link] [comments]
Sexo seguro e um parceiro amoroso podem ser uma receita para a felicidade. O envolvimento em atividades sexuais
pode trazer satisfação emocional e física instantânea.
Os benefícios emocionais do sexo entre dois adultos consentidos foram bem documentados. Eles incluem:
- Alívio de estresse. Quando você experimento sexo consensual com um parceiro amoroso, fica feliz. A atividade sexual dá a você uma pausa do estresse de sua vida. Mesmo se o intervalo for de apenas uma hora, é um alívio bem-vindo.
- Intimidade do parceiro. Um relacionamento sexual feliz e saudável fortalece seu relacionamento diário com seu parceiro. Promove confiança e empatia (compreendendo como o outro se sente).
- Uma libido saudável. Você já ouviu a frase "use ou perca". Isso é verdade para a atividade sexual regular. Além disso, quanto mais freqüentemente as mulheres têm atividade sexual e / ou orgasmo, mais elas são fisicamente capazes de tê-la novamente.
Mas esses benefícios emocionais são apenas metade da história. Fazer sexo também promove sua saúde física. De fato, sua atividade sexual pode resultar em muitos benefícios de saúde duradouros.
Caminho para o bem-estar melhorado
Existem mais de algumas razões para fazer sexo. Recreação, bem-estar emocional, intimidade e engravidar são algumas das razões mais comuns pelas quais as pessoas fazem sexo. É hora de adicionar "benefícios à saúde" à lista.
Enquanto desfruta de uma vida sexual saudável, você estará colhendo esses benefícios para sua saúde:
- Um impulso ao seu sistema imunológico. Fazer sexo com frequência (uma ou duas vezes por semana) produz níveis mais altos de anticorpos imunológicos. Isso ajuda seu corpo a combater doenças.
- Um coração feliz. O amor não apenas o faz feliz - fazer amor pode proteger homens e mulheres contra doenças cardíacas. Aumenta a sua frequência cardíaca. O sexo é semelhante ao exercício. No entanto, tem o benefício adicional de equilibrar os hormônios estrogênio (mulheres) e testosterona (homens). Ambos são críticos para a saúde do coração.
- Abaixando a pressão sanguínea. Quando você combina felicidade e exercício, diminui a pressão arterial. A relação sexual faz exatamente isso.
- Algumas atividades sexuais, como as relações sexuais, oferecem uma mistura saudável de exercícios aeróbicos e de construção muscular.
- Bom remédio. A estimulação sexual, e particularmente o orgasmo, é um remédio natural para a dor. Seu corpo libera certos hormônios que aliviam a dor. Isso ajuda com dores nas costas e nas pernas. Além disso, ajuda com dores de cabeça, artrite e cólicas menstruais.
- Ganhos físicos específicos de gênero. Para os homens, a ejaculação demonstrou diminuir o risco de câncer de próstata. Isso se baseia em um homem ejacular no mínimo 21 vezes por mês. Para as mulheres, a atividade sexual fortalece a bexiga. Isso melhora a função da bexiga. A atividade sexual regular também ajuda a lubrificar a vagina da mulher. Isso torna mais confortável para as mulheres se envolverem em atividade sexual, especialmente à medida que envelhecem.
- Sono repousante. Seu corpo produz hormônios de relaxamento (prolactina) imediatamente após o orgasmo. Além disso, mulheres (e homens) liberam o hormônio oxitocina quando têm orgasmo. Isso promove um sono reparador também.
Coisas a considerar
Nunca se esqueça de praticar sexo seguro. Isso vale para pessoas de todas as idades! Isso é importante na prevenção da gravidez e das doenças sexualmente transmissíveis (DST). Existem muitas opções de controle de natalidade para prevenir a gravidez. Um preservativo é a maneira mais eficaz de prevenir doenças sexualmente transmissíveis.
A atividade sexual deve sempre ser consensual. Isso significa que vocês dois concordam que querem fazer sexo.
Perguntas a fazer ao seu médico
Ultima atualização: 15 de fevereiro de 2017 Este artigo foi contribuído pela equipe editorial da familydoctor.org
- O que um homem ou uma mulher podem fazer para aumentar sua resposta sexual com um parceiro amoroso?
- Diferentes formas de controle de natalidade afetam seu desejo por sexo?
- A masturbação pode oferecer alguns dos mesmos benefícios?
- O que é bom ou não na atividade sexual?
- A baixa atividade sexual pode ter um efeito oposto na sua saúde e relacionamento?
2019.12.31 21:43 JorgeAmVF Subs em português ou sobre cultura lusófona criados em 2019
| || | submitted by JorgeAmVF to EmPortugues [link] [comments]
Pelo menos 259 subs foram criados em 2019; assim, 2019 foi o ano em que mais subs lusófonos foram criados desde 2008 - ultrapassando 2017 (~234)
Obviamente, nem todos os subs em português ou sobre cultura lusófona criados esse ano se encontram aqui, pois o ano ainda não acabou e é provável que mais subs criados em 2019 sejam encontrados nos próximos anos.
Top 15 https://preview.redd.it/r00me9xf91841.png?width=1882&format=png&auto=webp&s=4e6029919f1c5a0f18240a802e48971f0ca1e779
|subreddit ||membros ||criação ||nsfw ||descrição |
|CarlaBrasil ||7486 ||02/01/2019 ||Sim ||This subreddit is for posting content relating to Carla Brasil. |
|mormonsud ||2 ||02/01/2019 ||Não ||Sub para membros, amigos e curiosos a respeito da Igreja de Jesus Cristo dos Santos dos Últimos dias (aka 'Igreja Mórmon'). |
|transumanismo ||2 ||02/01/2019 ||Não ||Sub lusófono para discussão e compartilhamento sobre transumanismo. |
|cultobastter ||6 ||03/01/2019 ||Não ||Para aqueles que acreditam que a Bastter.com eh um culto pega-sardinha tanto quanto os outros sites de investimento. Postem aqui tudo que voces acharem engracado ou digno de critica! O que ele tiver deletado ou o que mais quiserem... |
|Brasucas ||1 ||04/01/2019 ||Não ||Comunidade livre para brasucas. |
|Idiomas ||1161 ||05/01/2019 ||Não ||Essa é uma comunidade destinada a assuntos sobre idiomas. |
|nbabrasil ||58 ||05/01/2019 ||Não ||NBA Brasil |
|videoslegaisonline ||51 ||05/01/2019 ||Não ||Vídeos legais captados pela internet! :) |
|nba_brasil ||1 ||05/01/2019 ||Não ||Opa, você não quis ir para o /nbabrasil ? |
|ofertaspravoce ||4 ||07/01/2019 ||Não ||1 oferta por dia! As promoções mais legais para te ajudar na hora das compras. |
|brasil_politica ||3 ||07/01/2019 ||Não ||Sub em Português para discutir a política no Brasil e no Mundo. |
|DragonBallLegendsBR ||13 ||14/01/2019 ||Não ||Subreddit brasileiro sobre o jogo Dragon Ball Legends. Encontre tudo sobre Dragon Ball Legends totalmente em português e discuta com outros jogadores do Brasil. |
|bomdiagrupo ||38 ||15/01/2019 ||Não ||Um subreddit dedicado a fazer sátiras às mensagens de bom dia do ZAPZAP |
|PoliticaMundial ||12 ||16/01/2019 ||Não ||Olá! O Política Mundial é uma comunidade voltada aos assuntos políticos, econômicos e filosóficos, com o intuito de reunir pessoas diferentes com pensamentos diferentes para que possamos discutir e debater sobre o mundo a nossa volta. Apesar de defendermos a liberdade de expressão, temos algumas regras para manter o bom convívio dos membros e assim também, manter o respeito entre os mesmos. Além do mais, a staff não se responsabiliza por raide em outros subreddits. Seja bem-vindo(a)! |
|mattayahu ||2119 ||18/01/2019 ||Não ||Stream do Matta: https://www.twitch.tv/themattayahu Assista o canal primário do Matta: https://www.youtube.com/themattayahu Assista o canal editado do Matta: https://www.youtube.com/mettayahu Discord do Matta: https://discordapp.com/invite/6PSYzqr Twitter do Matta: https://twitter.com/themattayahu Grupo da Stream no Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/mattayahu/ |
|GabiGarcia ||12 ||19/01/2019 ||Não ||Gabrielle "Gabi" Lemos Garcia is a Brazilian professional martial artist, specializing in Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu and grappling. She is a member of the IBJJF Hall of Fame. |
|Mamatas ||100 ||22/01/2019 ||Não ||Comunidade dedicada a reunir as principais "mamatas" do Governo Bolsonaro. |
|cefetianos ||7 ||22/01/2019 ||Não || |
|meteorologia ||3 ||23/01/2019 ||Não ||Notícias sobre aquecimento global, meteorologia, etc. |
|Medianeira ||1 ||23/01/2019 ||Não ||Cidade de Medianeira / PR |
|brgonewild ||7013 ||24/01/2019 ||Sim ||Paraíso das musas tupiniquins! |
|Deusolivre ||4 ||25/01/2019 ||Não ||Coleção de melhores momentos vividos no /brasilivre. |
|ForniteBR_Portugal ||1 ||25/01/2019 ||Não ||Um sub-reddit dedicado ao FortniteBR tudo em português, com o objetivo de aproximar a comunidade portuguesa, e ajudar no que for preciso. |
|OuijaPortugues ||299 ||26/01/2019 ||Não ||Alguma questão aflinge tua vida? Invoque os espíritos é tenha sua resposta definitiva pelo OuijaPortugues, uma versão adaptada à língua lusitana do AskOuija. |
|PCBRZI ||5 ||26/01/2019 ||Não ||PCBRZI |
|brasil20 ||2 ||26/01/2019 ||Não ||Por um Brasil melhor |
|nomadaspt ||1 ||27/01/2019 ||Não ||Quando já não sabes de onde és e o planeta é a tua casa. |
|piadapronta ||2 ||28/01/2019 ||Não ||Piadas prontas |
|PergunteReddit ||823 ||30/01/2019 ||Não ||Versão brasileira do AskReddit. |
|EuTireiUmaFoto ||340 ||31/01/2019 ||Não ||No título da sua postagem, comece com ETUF e então descreva a sua foto! Comunidade para amantes da fotografia, em português. Profissional, amador ou entusiasta, aqui você é bem vindo! Poste sua foto aqui e interaja com fotógrafos de todo o Brasil, tire dúvidas, aprenda técnicas e divirta-se! Leia as regras antes de postar. Foto do banner por Raphael Nogueira (https://bit.ly/2MVq5AZ). |
|relacionamentos ||6 ||31/01/2019 ||Não ||chegue ai e conte o seu problema |
|NaoMortoAbraDentro ||733 ||01/02/2019 ||Não ||Versão brasileira do dontdeadopeninside. |
|copiaEcola ||108 ||04/02/2019 ||Não ||Comunidade dedicada a arquivar copypasta em português. |
|CozinhaPortuguesa ||283 ||05/02/2019 ||Não ||Um sub dedicado à cozinha portuguesa para inspirar, aprender a cozinhar, experimentar ideias novas e descobrir pratos saborosos, rápidos e saudáveis. |
|lageball ||1 ||05/02/2019 ||Não || |
|patopapao ||10646 ||07/02/2019 ||Não ||Bem vindo ao subreddit do Pato Papão, um lugar para você postar seu meme maneiro mesmo e dar sua dica pro Bom ou Ban. |
|BrazilOpenSource ||487 ||07/02/2019 ||Não ||Brazil Open Source é a comunidade brasileira para os amantes da filosofia Open Source e Software Livre. Tire dúvidas, compartilhe ideias e projetos, seja livre! Brazil Open Source is the brazilian comunity for lovers of Open Source and Free Software philosophy. Ask questions, share ideas and projects, be free! |
|BrasilivrelivreFinal ||43 ||10/02/2019 ||Não ||Bem vindo(a) ao Brasillivre_Livre_Mesmo_Final-V2_Agora_Vai! A comunidade feita para aqueles que se cansaram da censura dos outros Subreddits brasileiros. Se inscreva e compartilhe! |
|091Para ||18 ||10/02/2019 ||Não ||Comunidade de Belém do Pará. Venha para a melhor sub do Reddit do melhor Estado da Região Norte do País. |
|Lennado ||13 ||10/02/2019 ||Não ||O sub do lennaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaadooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo |
|SerGamer ||5 ||10/02/2019 ||Não ||Ser gamer, ser um jogador |
|humortadela ||3 ||10/02/2019 ||Não || |
|mau_pm_nao_propina ||31 ||11/02/2019 ||Não ||Histórias de abuso policial incluindo: abuso de poder, corrupção e outras desgraças em estados policiais em expansão. |
|Capinaremos ||25 ||11/02/2019 ||Não ||Refugiados do Capinaremos |
|exiladosbrasil ||1 ||11/02/2019 ||Sim ||Vivendo no exílio |
|chocolage ||2 ||12/02/2019 ||Não || |
|EmPortugues ||423 ||13/02/2019 ||Não ||Compilação de comunidades que utilizam o português como idioma principal no Reddit. Divulgue subreddits lusófonos aqui à vontade. Subs que não utilizam a língua portuguesa, mas se dedicam à cultura de países que falam português também são bem-vindos. Não se esqueça de conferir as regras da comunidade antes de postar. Utilize também nossas ferramentas fora do Reddit para obter mais informações sobre comunidades lusófonas e compartilhe seu feed personalizado. E participe do Reddit em português! |
|CasosIsolados ||3 ||13/02/2019 ||Não ||Casos isolados de violência policial no Brasil |
|caso_isolado ||452 ||15/02/2019 ||Não ||Casos de corrupção e abuso de poder policial |
|catioros_inspiradores ||25 ||15/02/2019 ||Não ||O melhor subreddit para você postar imagens de catioros sensacionalmente incríveis, sempre com as melhores frases possíveis para a alegria geral da comunidade |
|Capina ||462 ||16/02/2019 ||Não ||Olá, nobres capinadores! Bem vindo a este recinto maravilhoso do Capinaremos na internet. Fiquem a vontade para compartilhar e discutir sobre o tema que achar pertinente. <3 |
|Ancapinaremos ||34 ||16/02/2019 ||Não ||Ancapinaremos: Vamos difundir a liberdade! Pessoas de todas as ideologias são extremamente bem vindas, a liberdade não vê background teórico, não vê gênero, idade, raça, orientação sexual e nem classe social. Acredito que todos deveriam lutar para que os indivíduos se tornem cada vez mais independentes, para que assim, tenhamos um coletivo forte e próspero. |
|cidadaosdebem ||443 ||18/02/2019 ||Não || |
|GTAorBrazil ||453 ||19/02/2019 ||Não ||For the unbelievable things that only happen in Brazil! |
|investir ||15 ||20/02/2019 ||Não ||Infelizmente outros grupos sobre investimentos em português apresentam pesada censura e automods com programação deficiente. Aqui você pode falar livremente, sem mimimi, sem censura. Todas discussões são bem vindas, sobre qualquer tipo de ativo ou método. |
|INTESTINOIRRITADO ||14 ||20/02/2019 ||Não ||Descobriu que a fonte do seu sofrimento digestivo é a síndrome do intestino irritado? Seja bem vindo. Vamos nos ajudar. (cólon irritável, sii) |
|Baiacu ||15 ||22/02/2019 ||Não ||comunidade brasileira de shitpost e afins. |
|unexpectedRicardo ||96 ||24/02/2019 ||Não ||Ricardo Milos but not expected |
|AteParece ||8 ||25/02/2019 ||Não ||Versão brasileira do thatHappened, posts em português de coisas que até parece que aconteceram mesmo. |
|Impressao3D ||36 ||26/02/2019 ||Não ||Comunidade para discutir sobre impressoras 3D, dicas, técnicas, além de falar sobre modelagem e assuntos afim. Seja bem vindo! |
|UnivAveiro ||3 ||27/02/2019 ||Não ||Subreddit não-oficial da Universidade de Aveiro. |
|godot_brasil ||99 ||01/03/2019 ||Não ||Comunidade para os brasileiros interessados em estudar e tirar dúvidas sobre Godot Engine. |
|BandasPortuguesas ||25 ||01/03/2019 ||Não ||Este subreddit foi criado para a divulgação de projetos, divulgação de bandas pouco conhecidas que gostem, divulgar experiências na indústria e também para que seja possível a discussão como o esclarecimento de alguns temas sobre a indústria |
|pontoXbr ||1 ||01/03/2019 ||Não ||Comunidade em português para aqueles que gostam de fazer o trabalho, seja próprio ou comercialmente. |
|Umbanda ||30 ||02/03/2019 ||Não ||Brazilian / African Religion |
|SelecaoPortuguesa ||1 ||03/03/2019 ||Não ||Subreddit dedicado a todos os escalões da seleção portuguesa de futebol. |
|aguasanta ||1 ||04/03/2019 ||Não ||SubReddit dedicado ao Esporte Clube Água Santa. |
|FeminismoBrasil ||266 ||08/03/2019 ||Não ||Este subreddit é principalmente um lugar para ideias, conhecimentos e dúvidas serem trocadas. São bem vindas questões sobre trabalho, política, relacionamentos, menstruação, métodos contraceptivos, gravidez, parto, aborto, sagrado feminino e tudo o que permeia o universo feminino. |
|portugalliberal ||62 ||11/03/2019 ||Não ||Um grupo de discussão apartidário, transparente e positivo sobre o liberalismo em Portugal. O objectivo é esclarecer sobre o que é o liberalismo e o que querem os liberais em Portugal. |
|Canhotos_bandidos ||5 ||11/03/2019 ||Não ||Subreddit destinado para postagens de material que mostra atos ilegais de esquerdistas. |
|BrasilEsportes ||124 ||12/03/2019 ||Não ||Página dedicada aos brasileiros do mundo todo para falar dos seus esportes preferidos além de notícias, eventos, etc e também, porque não, um espaço para darmos aquela trolada no time adversário |
|mesoclise ||11 ||12/03/2019 ||Não ||Subreddit para postar imagens de pessoas usando mesóclise corretamente. Convenhamos, toda mesóclise merece um upvote. |
|Kaskaria ||3 ||14/03/2019 ||Não ||Seu repositório diário de memes, vídeos engraçados e outras coisas sem utilidade. |
|startups_pt ||2 ||14/03/2019 ||Não ||Discussão sobre o mundo das startups em Portugal. |
|polemicas ||75 ||16/03/2019 ||Não ||Voltamos! Subreddit em português criado para discutir assuntos polêmicos sem qualquer tipo de censura. |
|boatarde ||11 ||17/03/2019 ||Não ||Boa tarde! Inscreva-se também em: bomdia boanoite |
|soccerPT ||7 ||17/03/2019 ||Não ||Todo o futebol: em português. Comunidade aberta a qualquer tema relativo a futebol. |
|KaikerTV ||184 ||18/03/2019 ||Não ||Deixe Memes para o canal do Kaiker |
|bettina ||16 ||18/03/2019 ||Não ||oi, eu sou a bettina tenho 1 milhão de anos e 22 reais de patrimônio acumulado |
|empreendedorismopt ||1 ||18/03/2019 ||Não ||Um espaço para discutir o empreendedorismo em Portugal. |
|PortoSexDating ||25 ||20/03/2019 ||Não ||A olace to find and meet people in Porto (sex related) |
|Cavaleiros_do_Zodiaco ||4 ||20/03/2019 ||Não ||Para todos os fãs de Os Cavaleiros do Zodíaco (Saint Seiya). |
|Filmes_e_series_Nerds ||1 ||20/03/2019 ||Não ||A nova casa de quem gosta de filmes de super heroi, viagens no tempo, zumbis, ficção científica... |
|MariParaiba ||691 ||23/03/2019 ||Não ||A subreddit dedicated to the breathtaking Brazilian volleyball player Mari Paraiba. |
|LisboadeBorla ||8 ||25/03/2019 ||Não ||Free Events and places in Lisbon, Portugal |
|MemesUmidos ||3 ||25/03/2019 ||Não ||Tipo o dankmemes mas com menos graça. |
|SPQAM ||1 ||25/03/2019 ||Não ||Senatvs Popvlvsqve Arstotzka Magna O Senado e Povo de Arstotza Magna é uma miccronação fundada no dia 18 de março de 2017, pelo imperador Caesar Vulpes Petrus Machadus. Sua ideologias são: o castilhismo, o tenentismo, o monarquismo e o fascismo britânico (vide Sir Oswald Ernald Mosley). Este subreddit foi criado para a confraternização entre seus cidadãos e discussão de temas inerentes ao governo da Nação. |
|JogoLivre ||1 ||25/03/2019 ||Não ||O sub de jogos livre de censura |
|SupercarrosPortugal ||12 ||26/03/2019 ||Não ||Aqui podem pôr todos os carros raros ou invulgares que encontrarem! |
|UNIFESP ||1 ||27/03/2019 ||Não || |
|SemCensura ||15 ||29/03/2019 ||Sim ||Comunidade dedicada ao "Sem Censura", programa de entrevistas exibido pela TV Brasil. |
|mamaspapasbebes ||3 ||02/04/2019 ||Não ||reddit de apoio ao site "Ser Pai é..." e local de discussão de ideias acerca da Paternidade / Maternidade |
|fodase ||2 ||03/04/2019 ||Não ||FODA-SE |
|contraAO ||15 ||04/04/2019 ||Não ||Redditores contra o acordo ortográfico. |
|projeto ||7 ||04/04/2019 ||Não || |
|brasilcentro ||222 ||05/04/2019 ||Não ||Primeira comunidade Brasileira de extremo-centro do reddit brasileiro. |
|loylinha ||875 ||06/04/2019 ||Não ||subreddit da layla ai |
|mulherdepau ||64 ||07/04/2019 ||Não ||mulher de pau mulher de pau mulher de pau mulher de pau mulher de pau mulher de pau mulher de pau mulher de pau mulher de pau mulher de pau mulher de pau mulher de pau |
|trashyBrazil ||16 ||08/04/2019 ||Não ||Um recorte da sociedade mau caráter, imunda e irresponsável que temos no Brasil de 2019. |
|AskABrazilian ||41 ||09/04/2019 ||Não ||Ask a Brazilian person. |
|ateu ||20 ||12/04/2019 ||Não ||Comunidade brasileira dedicada exclusivamente à publicação de conteúdos ateístas. |
|TropicalRussians ||216 ||14/04/2019 ||Não ||Will do later |
|AnnaRitaCerqueira ||204 ||14/04/2019 ||Sim ||Anna Rita Cerqueira |
|NathaliaAlves ||29 ||14/04/2019 ||Sim ||Nathalia Alves |
|gerir_pequeno ||2 ||15/04/2019 ||Não ||Empreendedorismo, Micro-empresas e divulgação |
|Universodaarte ||5 ||16/04/2019 ||Não ||Aqui é um lugar feito para pessoas que querem; Força da comunidade, adquirir conhecimentos artísticos, publicação de artes: digitais, tradicionais e entre diversas outras... Não importa seu nível, seu estilo ou qual tipo de arte você faz. Você é bem-vindo aqui. |
|SCPPTBR ||8 ||17/04/2019 ||Não ||Subreddit da filial lusófona da Fundação SCP, para discussões em português sobre os SCPs brasileiros, portugueses e internacionais. |
|brasilcentro_drama ||0 ||18/04/2019 ||Não ||brasilcentro_drama |
|PilulaVermelha ||42 ||19/04/2019 ||Não ||Comunidade em português baseada na de língua inglesa "The Red Pill". A sociedade moderna, por inúmeras razões, trouxe uma grande mudança na dinâmica sexual entre homens e mulheres. Em analogia à pílula vermelha do filme Matrix, esse sub se propõe a esclarecer como quase tudo que fomos ensinados em relação à essa dinâmica sexual pelos nossos pais, TV, etc. está errado, como isso prejudica o homem moderno, e como sair desse buraco. |
|polemicas2 ||2 ||19/04/2019 ||Não ||backup do polemicas |
|poliamor ||89 ||27/04/2019 ||Não ||Este é um lugar de amor livre. Vamos debater sobre nossas dificuldades e realizações poliamoristas. |
|Gurgel ||41 ||27/04/2019 ||Não ||Comunidade para falar do carro Gurgel e de seu idealizador João Amaral Gurgel |
|Solteiros ||71 ||29/04/2019 ||Não ||Local para solteiros e solteiras se descobrirem, conversarem e quem sabe rola algo depois? |
|Jeitinhobrasileiro ||5 ||29/04/2019 ||Não ||Compartilhe aqui as formas não convencionais de resolver os mais diversos problemas da vida cotidiana, dicas, macetes, gambiarras, lifehacks etc. |
|Olavo_de_Carvalho ||2 ||02/05/2019 ||Não || |
|LuizPhilippe ||1 ||02/05/2019 ||Não ||Em apoio ao nosso Dep. Federal Luiz Philippe de Orléans e Bragança |
|claricelispector ||6 ||03/05/2019 ||Não ||A subreddit for fans of the 20th century author Clarice Lispector. |
|corrupcao ||232 ||04/05/2019 ||Não ||Subreddit para publicação de notícias, criação de debates e denúncias (anónimas ou não) acerca da corrupção em Portugal, e das diversas maneiras de solucionar este problema que afecta gravemente o nosso país. Só serão consideradas as corrupções noutros países, ou na UE, quando existe uma relação minimamente perceptível entre a mesma e Portugal. |
|MancheteCorrigida ||109 ||05/05/2019 ||Não ||Inspirado na iniciativa gringa do HeadlineCorrections, o Projeto de Correção das Manchetes Fake News nasceu para combater as mentiras e engodos da Grande Mídia. Nós fazemos correções honestas de manchetes desonestas. Saia do curral! |
|Felca ||21 ||06/05/2019 ||Não ||Felca do Youtube, o pewdiepie brasileiro |
|Encontros ||1 ||08/05/2019 ||Não ||comunidade de Encontros no Reddit |
|Fisicou ||81 ||09/05/2019 ||Não ||sub criado com o objetivo de dialogar sobre ciências e afins. |
|BotaDemaisGrande ||38 ||09/05/2019 ||Não ||Rosas são vermelhas Eu gosto de brigadeiro Basicamente o BootTooBig so que em brasileiro. |
|SciCast ||1 ||09/05/2019 ||Não ||SciCast Brasil |
|Portgueis ||29 ||10/05/2019 ||Não ||Igual ao Engrish, mas com português. |
|brasilisentao ||14 ||10/05/2019 ||Não ||a bolha acima e entre todas as bolhas. |
|Portuges ||2 ||10/05/2019 ||Não ||Igual ao Engrish, mas com português |
|oracoesonline ||2 ||17/05/2019 ||Não ||Encontre sua prece aqui! |
|ProducaoMusical ||47 ||19/05/2019 ||Não ||Essa comunidade tem o intuito de unir os produtores musicais brasileiros para uma troca de experiências, dicas, ferramentas e mais coisas voltadas a produção musical. |
|MatoGrosso ||2 ||21/05/2019 ||Não ||Um lugar para compartilharmos notícias e debater assuntos que importem ao estado do Mato Grosso. |
|novismo ||4 ||25/05/2019 ||Não ||Movimento onde ponho minhas anotações como historiador |
|AmizadeVirtual ||91 ||03/06/2019 ||Não ||Cópia de makingfriends para brasileiros |
|pescocofino ||9152 ||07/06/2019 ||Não ||Bem-vindo a nata do chorume da internet brasileira |
|ContosEroticos ||123 ||07/06/2019 ||Sim ||Contos Eróticos em Português. Contribuições são bem vindas. |
|AcademicosBrasileiros ||267 ||08/06/2019 ||Não ||Comunidade dedicada à discussão de assuntos acadêmicos dos mais diversos. Assim, podemos discutir filosofia, ciência, questões políticas que dizem respeito ao meio universitário, entre outros. Seja bem-vindo! |
|brazilcaralho ||1 ||10/06/2019 ||Não ||brazilcaralho |
|AnkiFlashcards ||88 ||16/06/2019 ||Não ||Brazilian subreddit about the Anki flashcard program. Anki increases the efficiency of the revisions through the spaced repetition system. It's used by students from different areas. Members of other countries are welcome. Feel free to post in English or Portuguese! Subreddit brasileiro sobre o programa Anki flashcard. Anki aumenta a eficiência das revisões através do sistema de repetição espaçada. É usado por estudantes de diferentes áreas. Membros de outros países são bem-vindos. |
|HoraDaComida ||41 ||16/06/2019 ||Não ||Sub dedicado para compartilhar receitas feitas por vocês próprios ou belas comidas compradas por vocês |
|BairroDoLimoeiro ||102 ||18/06/2019 ||Não ||Bem vindos ao Bairro do Limoeiro, aonde coelhos de pelúcia pesam mais que um caminhão, Louco é deus e Xaveco só se fode. Seja sempre educado e não rouba as goiaba do Nhô Lau. A dona da rua ta de olho em voceis tudo. |
|marlonteixeira ||3 ||18/06/2019 ||Não ||we love marlon |
|CienciasReddit ||0 ||22/06/2019 ||Não ||A Comunidade Científica do Reddit abrande todos os cidadãos, cientistas e pessoas com envolvimento na busca do conhecimento e progresso a ciência! |
|Valiria ||133 ||23/06/2019 ||Não ||Subreddit brasileiro dedicado às Crônicas de Gelo e Fogo, demais obras de George R. R. Martin e suas adaptações. |
|fazeramizades ||41 ||23/06/2019 ||Não ||Comunidade de encontros em Portugal |
|AliExpressBR ||150 ||27/06/2019 ||Não ||Olá, Bem vindo(a) à AliExpressBR! Esta Comunidade é para os brasileiros que adoram importações, Aliexpress, Ebay Amazon e outros. A participação de todos é muito importante. Compartilhem suas dicas, compras e dúvidas. |
|Vectra ||2 ||27/06/2019 ||Não ||Sub para reunir brasileiros admiradores de Vectra |
|Pipoca ||21 ||28/06/2019 ||Não ||Loucos por filmes e séries |
|VidaSaudavel ||4 ||28/06/2019 ||Não ||subreddit para pessoas que desejam compartilhar informações e dúvidas sobre qualidade de vida |
|Calopsita ||4 ||28/06/2019 ||Não ||Subreddit para quem ama psitácideos ! |
|Tormenta ||156 ||29/06/2019 ||Não ||Tormenta is a Brazilian campaign setting for role-playing games that is played with D20 System |
|brasilivrelivrelivrel ||1 ||29/06/2019 ||Não ||ivre |
|Literatura_on_Reddit ||30 ||01/07/2019 ||Não ||Esta comunidade serve para dar a conhecer o trabalho de escritores desconhecidos. |
|JulianaSalimeni ||141 ||02/07/2019 ||Sim ||Juliana Salimeni |
|BrasildaDepressao ||40 ||02/07/2019 ||Não ||Você, de qualquer desse nosso país, do Caburaí ao Chuí. Entre! A casa é sua. Está livre para falar o que quiser, só respeite as regras da casa. |
|AnnaAvila ||28 ||02/07/2019 ||Sim ||Anna Avila |
|Receitas_LowCarb ||1 ||02/07/2019 ||Não ||subreddit para quem descobriu qualidade de vida no low carb |
|curagay ||13 ||05/07/2019 ||Não ||Você é gay? Nós temos a cura. |
|incellivre ||1 ||05/07/2019 ||Não ||Você quis dizer BrasilLivre? |
|br_ ||0 ||07/07/2019 ||Não ||Comunidade do Brasil. Aqui você pode expressar sua opinião livremente, sem medo de ser bloqueado ou excluído. A regra é clara, Arnaldo: "se não for criminoso, é lícito!" |
|Gado ||5 ||08/07/2019 ||Não ||Gado D++++ |
|aplicativos ||83 ||09/07/2019 ||Não ||Comunidade dedicada a temas relacionados à todas as categorias de aplicativos. Sinta-se à vontade para enviar comentários, dicas, indicações, críticas, avaliações e sugestões de desenvolvimento de apps. |
|Temer ||1 ||10/07/2019 ||Não ||Subreddit de Michel Temer. |
|geopolitica ||527 ||15/07/2019 ||Não ||Espaço para discussões de geopolítica e política internacional. |
|JenniferAuada ||190 ||15/07/2019 ||Não ||Jennifer Auada |
|Seguranca ||2 ||16/07/2019 ||Não ||Sub brasileiro dedicado a notícias e discussões sobre segurança da informação. |
|EuphoriaBr ||1 ||18/07/2019 ||Não ||EuphoriaBr é uma comunidade para discutir ideias sobre a séries de tv da HBO no idioma português. |
|AmongUsBR ||9 ||19/07/2019 ||Não ||Jogue on-line ou via Wi-Fi local com 4 a 10 jogadores enquanto tenta preparar sua nave espacial para a partida, mas tenha cuidado, pois um deles será um impostor disposto a matar todos! Os tripulantes podem ganhar completando todas as tarefas ou descobrindo e votando no impostor fora do navio. O Impostor pode usar sabotagem para causar o caos, facilitando as mortes e melhorando os álibis. Disponível para Android, IOS e Steam |
|sulistas ||2 ||19/07/2019 ||Não ||Subreddit para sulistas e simpatizantes da causa sulista. |
|separatistas ||1 ||19/07/2019 ||Não ||Para separatistas |
|Amdrezim ||1 ||23/07/2019 ||Não ||canal do amdrezim |
|5aserie ||6 ||24/07/2019 ||Não ||O indivíduo sai da quinta série mas a quinta série não sai do indivíduo. "E o bambu?" |
|FicouGratis ||2402 ||25/07/2019 ||Não ||Normalmente é pago. Hoje não. Temporarily free offers. English speakers are also welcome. |
|acabouamamata ||1 ||25/07/2019 ||Não ||Todos os nossos problemas estão resolvidos |
|brasilsempolitica ||35 ||26/07/2019 ||Não ||tipo o /brasil só que sem posts de politica |
|paulinhogogo ||0 ||26/07/2019 ||Não ||Todo dia a música do Paulinho Gogó em um idioma diferente. |
|KarinaFlores ||24 ||28/07/2019 ||Sim ||Karina Flores |
|orochinho ||17563 ||31/07/2019 ||Não ||Este subreddit foi criado para publicações e memes relacionados ao canal do tio orochi, e qqr coisa q ele possa usar em video! |
|clubedorap ||100 ||01/08/2019 ||Não ||Ritmo & Poesia! Espaço para vocês compartilharem e ouvirem músicas de rap como prioridade. Fiquem a vontade para compartilharem conteúdo desse e dos outros elementos do hip-hop! |
|TrocaDeHardware ||42 ||07/08/2019 ||Não ||Um lugar para vender, comprar e trocar todo tipo de hardware relacionado à informatica. |
|DivulgueDireito ||40 ||07/08/2019 ||Não ||Esta comunidade foi criada pensando nos Advogados e pessoas com dúvidas jurídicas. Aqui você (Profissional) pode publicar artigos jurídicos atualizados a partir de 2017 (mais antigos que isso não aceitaremos); o texto ou artigo deve ter dicas e orientações a clientes ou futuros clientes - salientando sempre que o melhor é buscar ajuda profissional, de pessoa habilitada no assunto a ser 'solucionado' judicialmente! Obrigada por cumprir as regras! |
|gatinhos ||1 ||08/08/2019 ||Não ||miau! |
|PuddingsUtopia ||354 ||09/08/2019 ||Não ||Reddit para os fãs do cazum e sua comunidade. |
|PsiconautasBR ||80 ||09/08/2019 ||Não ||psychonaut da comunidade brasileira! |
|SuicidioAssistido ||1 ||09/08/2019 ||Não ||Aqui é um espaço para que você possa desabafar tudo o aquilo que te faz sofrer e que guarda apenas para você |
|MariaFernandaGalvao ||805 ||10/08/2019 ||Sim ||Maria Fernanda Galvão (@fegalvao_) |
|homebrewingpt ||65 ||10/08/2019 ||Não ||Subreddit dedicado à produção de cerveja artesanal em Portugal |
|rinhadegado ||71 ||12/08/2019 ||Não ||Lugar definitivo para embates de esquerda versus direita, ou simplesmente para encontrar alguém para discordar de você. É aqui onde /brasildob, /brasil e /brasilivre se reunem para desferir suas insanidades argumentativas. |
|CreepypastaBrasil ||4 ||12/08/2019 ||Sim ||Espaço dedicado ao compartilhamento de Creepypastas e Literatura de Horror e Terror. Conteúdo original em pt-br. |
|humanismosecular ||1 ||14/08/2019 ||Não ||Descrição em breve. |
|AntinatalistasBrasil ||43 ||15/08/2019 ||Não ||Comunidade criada pensando nas pessoas que, como eu, são contra natalidade; trazer filho ao mundo nos tempos em que vivemos: Por que? 1 - Seja porque a pessoa ou casal não tem recursos suficientes para criar bem, dar boa saúde e educação e o Estado brasileiro não está se lixando com o mínimo existencial; 2 - Seja porque o mundo, e o Brasil em especial, já tem criança suficiente para muitas gerações - ADOTEM! 3 - Não sofrer; não se deprimir; AFINAL, não PEDEM PARA NASCER! |
|PoliamorBrasil ||7 ||21/08/2019 ||Não ||Poliamor é a prática, o desejo de ter mais de um relacionamento íntimo simultaneamente com o conhecimento e consentimento de todos os envolvidos. Este subreddit foi criado para discutirmos este e assuntos relacionados. |
|MaseoPT ||166 ||22/08/2019 ||Não ||Aqui são postados prints de brasileiros tentando justificar as ações de certos políticos enquanto cita o PT ou o Lula, mesmo que o partido ou o ex-presidente em si não tenha nenhuma ligação com o assunto. Memes ou postagens mais sérias relacionadas ao tema também são aceitos. OBS.: Apesar dos designs, esse subreddit não é necessariamente petista, aqui todos são bem-vindos aqui, desde que sigam as regras. |
|NaoMonogamiaBrasil ||15 ||22/08/2019 ||Não ||Não-monogamia é um termo guarda-chuva para toda prática ou filosofia de relacionamento intimo que não depende estritamente dos padrões de monogamia. Este subreddit foi criado para discutirmos este e assuntos relacionados. |
|MarianaSampaio ||7 ||22/08/2019 ||Sim ||Mariana Sampaio |
|Ray_Mattos ||357 ||28/08/2019 ||Sim ||Ray Mattos |
|BarbaraEvans ||67 ||29/08/2019 ||Sim ||Barbara Evans |
|RenatinhaCosta ||19 ||29/08/2019 ||Sim ||Renatinha Costa |
|naluando ||8 ||30/08/2019 ||Sim ||naluando |
|brasildeboa ||68 ||31/08/2019 ||Não ||Uma comunidade para brasileiros conversarem de boa |
|DeboraDrumond ||42 ||01/09/2019 ||Sim ||Debora Drumond |
|BrazilianPizza ||226 ||04/09/2019 ||Não ||Brazil is a land where everything goes ... on a pizza. |
|ThaisBrotto ||21 ||04/09/2019 ||Sim ||Thais Brotto |
|nahclisarb ||4 ||04/09/2019 ||Não || |
|loteriasresultados ||2 ||05/09/2019 ||Não ||Fique por dentro dos resultados das loterias! |
|Vanessa_Vailatti ||677 ||06/09/2019 ||Sim ||Vanessa Vailatti |
|BrasilEdu ||45 ||07/09/2019 ||Não ||O subreddit é dedicado à resolução de dúvidas e na publicação de conteúdo educativo na língua portuguesa sobre as disciplinas da educação básica, academia, ocupação e trabalho. |
|astrologiavideos ||1 ||07/09/2019 ||Não ||Vídeos de astrologia! |
|brasilpop ||50 ||09/09/2019 ||Não ||Comunidade brasileira no reddit. Posts sobre política são proibidos. |
|CarolinedeCampos ||6 ||11/09/2019 ||Sim ||Caroline de Campos |
|JulianaCaetano ||83 ||12/09/2019 ||Sim ||Juliana Caetano |
|JulianaPaes ||20 ||12/09/2019 ||Sim ||Juliana Paes |
|KarolQueiroz ||19 ||12/09/2019 ||Sim ||Karol Queiroz |
|Alana_Campos ||9 ||12/09/2019 ||Sim ||Alana Campos |
|PaulaRebello ||6 ||12/09/2019 ||Sim ||Paula Rebello |
|mtg_brasil ||3 ||13/09/2019 ||Não || |
|tcg_brasil ||1 ||14/09/2019 ||Não || |
|Cyberbrasil ||326 ||16/09/2019 ||Não ||E se o Brasil fosse cyberpunk? |
|BrasilAncap ||10 ||16/09/2019 ||Não ||Um lugar para se discutir, mostrar e propor avanços nas liberdades individuais e econômicas em terras brasileiras. Todas as ideologias são bem-vindas, desde que agreguem ao debate. |
|taylorswiftbrasil ||1 ||17/09/2019 ||Não ||we love taylooooorrrr please come to brazil (more) |
|brasilvirgem ||2 ||19/09/2019 ||Não || |
|Alexa_Brasil ||21 ||21/09/2019 ||Não ||Sub para discussão sobre a Alexa em português |
|OlavoVsOlavo ||12 ||21/09/2019 ||Não ||Quando Olavo contraria Olavo |
|Portugueis ||7 ||22/09/2019 ||Não ||Poste aqui pronts de pessoas que estão tendo um pequeno problema para falar português |
|brasilCACD ||154 ||24/09/2019 ||Não ||Grupo aberto de estudantes do CACD - Concurso de Admissão à Carreira de Diplomata |
|belezadicas ||1 ||26/09/2019 ||Não ||Dicas de beleza, novidades e tutoriais! |
|BrasilB ||107 ||27/09/2019 ||Não ||Comunidade brasileira/lusófona dedicada a discussão de conteúdo socialista, marxista, marxista-leninista, socialista libertário e outros, abrangendo toda a gama possível de teoria e prática da esquerda radical. Somos anti-imperialistas, anti-sectários e não toleramos qualquer comportamento contrarrevolucionário, seja liberalismo, elitismo, revisionismo ou idealismo. Também temos um grupo e um canal no telegram, respectivamente: https://t.me/socialismos https://t.me/SocialismosCanal |
|rockinrio2019 ||1 ||28/09/2019 ||Não ||dias de rock, bebê |
|oguru ||1 ||30/09/2019 ||Não ||venham ver, venham ver o extraordinário guru do reddit |
|cuidedevoce ||2 ||01/10/2019 ||Não ||você merece! <3 |
|DankMemesBR ||36 ||08/10/2019 ||Não ||Qm usa reddit no Brasil né, ah é esqueci que so br kkkkkkkkkjjjjjjjjj |
|AspergersBR ||10 ||08/10/2019 ||Não ||Uma comunidade voltada para autistas e pessoas que têm a antiga Síndrome de Asperger (pois esta foi retirada no DSM-V). Aqui qualquer tipo de ajuda às pessoas que possuem esta divergência em relação ao dito "padrão" será bem-vinda. Poderá ser postado conteúdo com notícias que envolvam toda a comunidade autista e coisas que façam com que nós tenhamos voz ativa. A primeira comunidade autista brasileira do Reddit! |
|budismobrasil ||51 ||11/10/2019 ||Não ||Compartilhamento de tudo relacionado às várias vertentes do budismo, incluindo budismo secular, em português. |
|Cemiteriodacomedia ||30 ||11/10/2019 ||Não ||O comedycemetery do país dos memes (CÓPIA NÃO COMÉDIA) Existe o cemiteriodohumor, mas ele não presta |
|budismobr ||5 ||11/10/2019 ||Não ||Compartilhamento de tudo relacionado às várias vertentes do budismo, incluindo budismo secular, em português. |
|PontePretaFC ||2 ||12/10/2019 ||Não ||Subreddit dedicado a Associação Atlética da Ponte Preta |
|historiamilitaronline ||2 ||13/10/2019 ||Não ||Somos uma comunidade de constituída por professores e amantes da história militar fascinados pela tecnologia e as estratégias militares. História Militar Online é sua máquina do tempo para todas linhas de frente e os bastidores dos conflitos atuais e históricos ao redor do mundo. Visite nosso website [[email protected]](mailto:[email protected]) |
|PessoasDoBrasil ||1 ||14/10/2019 ||Não ||Backup para caso algo de ruim aconteça com o brasil |
|antipornografia ||30 ||15/10/2019 ||Não ||Em breve. |
|UFOSONLINE ||2 ||21/10/2019 ||Não ||Um canal Brasileiro, destinado a divulgar a ufologia e acontecimentos no Mundo. |
|brasileirospelomundo ||1 ||24/10/2019 ||Não ||Sub criado para falar das experiências e visões de Brasileiros que se aventuram pelo mundo. Brasileiros que moram, estudam ou viajam para outros países. Participe do grupo, compartilhe suas histórias, imagens, dicas experiências. Por que mora fora do Brasil? Trabalho? Estuda? Quis mudar de vida? Ou apenas quis explorar esse mundão a fora? E agora que já viu e conheceu outras culturas o que pensa do Brasil? Consegue morar no Brasil? Qual o lugar considera mais bonito no Brasil? |
|ODragaoVerde ||1 ||24/10/2019 ||Não || |
|MarketingPortugal ||4 ||05/11/2019 ||Não ||Uma comunidade que tem como objetivo a partilha e o debate de tudo o que se relaciona com o universo do marketing. |
|BancoInter ||4 ||05/11/2019 ||Não ||Banco Inter |
|ChatAmizade ||30 ||08/11/2019 ||Não ||Comunidade brasileira para encontrar e conhecer pessoas dispostas a conversar sobre assuntos variados. |
|EsquerdaInternacional ||46 ||12/11/2019 ||Não ||Sub para se discutir tudo o que seja politicamente relevante no mundo |
|quimicas ||3 ||20/11/2019 ||Não ||Uma comunidade para brasileiros que amam química |
|espaco ||194 ||21/11/2019 ||Não ||Compartilhe e discuta conteúdo informativo sobre: Suas dúvidas Astrofísica Cosmologia Exploração espacial Ciência planetária Astrobiologia |
|engenhariamecanica ||15 ||22/11/2019 ||Não ||Grupo focado em discussões relacionadas às diversas áreas da Engenharia Mecânica, softwares, oportunidades de trabalho, carreira, projetos de engenharia, certificações, cursos de especialização, mestrados, doutorados, entre outros assuntos relacionados ao universo da mecânica . |
|Viralatacaramelo ||171 ||26/11/2019 ||Não ||O subreddit dedicado à postagem de qualquer tipo de mídia relacionado ao canino que já virou símbolo nacional. |
|QueroFonte ||35 ||27/11/2019 ||Não ||Grupo para encontrar fontes por trás de fatos e afirmações. Peça ajuda e divulgue fontes. |
|GadoDemais ||45 ||29/11/2019 ||Não ||A Casa dos Gados no Reddit. |
|torneiras ||62 ||02/12/2019 ||Não ||Para todas as suas necessidades de suprimento hidráulico |
|sexualidade ||246 ||03/12/2019 ||Não ||Subreddit em português voltado exclusivamente a discussões saudáveis sobre sexo. Sinta-se a vontade para relatar experiências sexuais, pedir conselhos ou confessar fetiches. Leia atentamente as regras antes de participar. |
|mathbrasil ||33 ||04/12/2019 ||Não ||Bem-vindo a um subreddit de matemática. O objetivo dessa comunidade é ter um cenário para se discutir indagações, exercícios, carreira/educação, teoremas, etc. |
|pracinhagamer ||730 ||12/12/2019 ||Não ||subreddit pra memes e coisas do canal (ou não) |
|Dados ||170 ||14/12/2019 ||Não ||Divulgação de dados para falantes de português. |
|AskBrasil ||2 ||20/12/2019 ||Não ||AskReddit em Português. |
|ConversaCasual ||29 ||26/12/2019 ||Não ||Um subreddit para conversar em português sobre assuntos quaisquer que estiverem na nossa cabeça. |
|LeoCasteloBranco ||10 ||27/12/2019 ||Não ||Informações sobre meus projetos literários e onde baixar as versões em ebook gratuitamente! |
|roleplaypt ||22 ||29/12/2019 ||Sim ||É fã do dirtypenpals mas tem sempre pena que não possa escrever na sua língua? Quer descrever as suas fantasias mais loucas em português? Porque não escreve uma história e convida um utilizador a lhe escrever? |
2019.12.02 21:04 lucy_inth3sky [SELL] [US] HUGE SALE! CHANEL, NATASHA DENONA, KOYUDO, WAYNE GOSS, ESUM, EM COSMETICS, NABLA, LAURA MERCIER, COVER FX, CHARLOTTE TILBURY, MELT COSMETICS, DIOR, TOM FORD, BY TERRY, AND MORE!
· PRICE INCLUDE SHIPPING FEES
· Time stamps of 2 hours, then will go to NIL (Please let me know if you’re no longer interested, or if you need an item held for longer than 2 hours)
· PayPal Friends and Family unless you pay the Goods and Services Fee Blush
· Cover FX Monochromatic Blush Duo Spiced Cinnamon BNIB - $23 · EM Cosmetics Color Drops Serum Blush Pink Nectar BNIB (box is slightly ripped) - $15 · EM Cosmetics Color Drops Serum Blush Rose Milk BNIB - $15 · EM Cosmetics Radiant Veil Blush Heaven’s Glow (has box, swatched) - $20 · Laura Mercier Blush Colour Infusion Chai BNIB - $20 · Laura Mercier Blush Colour Infusion Ginger BNIB - $20 · Laura Mercier Blush Colour Infusion Grapefruit BNIB - $18 Bronzer
· BareMinerals Endless Summer Bronzer Faux Tan (has box, used once) - $15
· Bobbi Brown Bronzer Stonestreet BNIB - $20
· Chanel Duo Bronzer Duo Medium BNIB - $35 · Cle de Peau Beaute Bronzing Powder Duo shade 1 BNIB - $45 · Dior Diorskin Mineral Nude Bronzing Powder 004 Warm Sunrise BNIB - $20
· Giorgio Armani Sun Fabric Sheer Bronzer (RIS, used once by me) - $10
· Westman Atelier Beauty Butter Powder Bronzer Coup De Soleil BNIB - $45 Eye Brushes · Esum G34 Domed Shadow Blending Brush - $18 · Esum G34 Domed Shadow Blending Brush - $18 · Esum W21 Small Filbert Shader Brush - $12 Eyeshadow Palettes
· By Terry Smokey Gold Eyeshadow Quad (has box, swatched) - $20
· Charlotte Tilbury Easy Eye Palette Charlotte, Darling BNIB - $40
· Charlotte Tilbury Luxury Palette of Pops Celestial Eyes BNIB - $30
· Charlotte Tilbury Pillow Talk Palette of Pops BNIB - $35 · Charlotte Tilbury Starry Eyes to Hypnotize BNIB - $50 · Colourpop Flutter By BNIB - $9 · Colourpop Going Coconuts BNIB - $6 · EM Cosmetics Divine Skies Palette BNIB - $20
· Guerlain Goldenland Eyeshadow Palette BNIB - $40
· Melt Cosmetics Amor Eterno Muerte BNIB - $40 · Melt Cosmetics Amor Eterno Vida BNIB - $40 · Melt Cosmetics Gemini BNIB - $35 · Melt Cosmetics Smoke Sessions BNIB - $25 · Natasha Denona 28 Pan Palette Purple Blue (PLEASE READ: bottom right shade came damaged and dark blue powder got in some of the surrounding shades, I did the best I could to clean everything) - $80 · Natasha Denona Safari BNIB - $65 · Natasha Denona Tropic (Full Size) BNIB - $65 · Tom Ford Eye Color Quad Pretty Baby BNIB - $44 · Viseart Eyeshadow Palette 12 Coy BNIB - $45 Face Brushes · Koyudo BP Series BP013 Foundation Brush BN - $30 · Koyudo Yoshiki-002 Blush Brush BN - $20 · Wayne Goss Brush 12 Sculpting Brush BN - $35 · Wayne Goss Brush 13 Face Brush BN - $35 Face Palettes
· By Terry Sun Designer Palette 5 Hippy Chic BNIB - $20
· By Terry Sun Designer Palette 6 Happy Sun BNIB - $25 · Charlotte Tilbury Filmstar Bronze & Glow Contour Duo Swarovski Edition w/ brush FaiMedium BNIB - $45 · Charlotte Tilbury Instant Look In A Face & Eye Palette Gorgeous, Glowing Beauty BNIB - $40 · Laura Mercier Cheek Canvas Soft Cheek Palette BNIB - $25 · Laura Mercier La Palette Naturelle Face & Cheek Palette BNIB - $25 · Laura Mercier Tres Chic Palette (has box, swatched) - $25 · Private Society Cosmetics Glow Getter Highlighter Palette (has box, some shades swatched) - $20 · Private Society Cosmetics Glow Getter Volume 2 Highlighter Palette BNIB - $20 · Tom Ford Soleil Eye and Cheek Palette Winter (has box, all shades swatched) - $80 Highlighters · Becca Pearl Glow Luster Glow Powder Pure Pearl (has box, used once) - $20
· Bobbi Brown Luxe Illuminating Highlighting Powder Golden Hour BNIB - $20
· By Terry Starlight Rose CC Powder Starlight Rose BNIB - $30
· Charlotte Tilbury Magic Star Highlighter BNIB - $28 · Dior Diorskin Nude Air Luminizer Glow Addict Holographic Sculpting Powder 001 Holo Pink (no box, used ~10 times) - $25 · Guerlain Meteorites Highlighter Duo BNIB - $40 · Melt Cosmetics Amor Eterno Illuminacion Highlighter BNIB - $25 · Melt Cosmetics Digital Dust Highlight Genesis BNIB - $20 · Melt Cosmetics Digital Dust Highlight Pink Moon BNIB - $20 · Nabla Cosmetics Skin Glazing Glass Skin Finish Glow Powder Lucent Jungle BNIB - $15 · Nabla Cosmetics Skin Glazing Glass Skin Finish Glow Powder Ozone BNIB - $15 · Nabla Cosmetics Skin Glazing Glass Skin Finish Glow Powder Privilege (has box, swatched) - $12 · Nabla Cosmetics Skin Glazing Glass Skin Finish Glow Powder Truth BNIB - $15 · Westman Atelier Super Loaded Tinted Highlight Peau De Peche (has box, swatched) - $40 · Westman Atelier Super Loaded Tinted Highlight Peau De Soleil BNIB - $40 Pressed Powder
· By Terry Brightening CC Serum Powder Rose Elixir BNIB - $25
submitted by lucy_inth3sky
to makeupexchange [link] [comments]
2019.11.27 01:06 blancyago Achei que tinha acabado com minha vida. 9 meses depois, nunca estive tão feliz.
Há 16 dias meu filho nasceu. Eu estava junto com minha namorada a pouco mais de 1 ano quando descobrimos que ela estava grávida. Não somos tão jovens mais, eu tinha 26 e e ela 29 quando decidimos que íamos dar seguimento a gravidez. Eu estava no fim da minha segunda graduação e fazendo estágio na área de produção cultural, em um museu da minha cidade e como qualquer trabalho na área da cultura, ganhando bem pouco.
Eu nunca quis ser pai. Nunca me imaginei casado e com família. Minha mãe faleceu a 2 anos e ali, eu sentia que minha última experiência de acolhimento familiar havia sido enterrada também. Sempre tive a clareza de que se caso eu engravidasse alguma companheira minha eu seria o companheiro e o pai que eu não tive. Não tenho contato com meu pai por que durante anos ele não quis. Eu era dessas crianças que ficava esperando o pai na porta de casa do momento em que acordava até a hora de dormir e ele não aparecia. Simples assim. Aparecia 2, 3 dias depois e lá estava eu, pronto pra dar um abração no meu herói. Mas a gente cresce e vai ressignificando esses sentimentos. Ele não aparecia por que era agarrado no pó. Dizem por aí que é até hoje, não quero saber. Só sabia que eu ia ser pai sem saber o que era ser filho de um homem.
Eu trabalhava desde os meus 15 anos como designer gráfico e sempre dei meu jeito de sobreviver e ter minha independência. Minha namorada gozava da mesma liberdade, trabalhando em outra área, mas desde cedo assim, independente. A gente gostava demais da nossa vida de solteiro, morávamos sozinhos, cada um no seu apartamento e não tínhamos tido nenhum tipo de conversa que sinalizava qualquer vontade de morarmos juntos. Muito pelo contrário, exaltávamos nossa liberdade e independência sempre lembrando como cada um de nós ter seu espaço era saudável pra nossa relação. Fumávamos maconha de forma abusiva toda vez que nos encontrávamos e amávamos nossa vida assim, no conforto em que estávamos.
Eu sabia que não poderia me dar ao luxo de continuar trabalhando em um lugar que me demandava quase 10 horas de trabalho diário em épocas de abertura de exposição e ganhando o tanto que eu ganhava na época. Esse não era meu único emprego, sempre pegava um freela aqui e outro ali para pagar o aluguel e sempre tive a sorte de conseguir uns trabalhos que pagavam bem quando eu mais precisava. Mas com um filho não dava mais pra contar com a sorte. Precisei entrar em contato com meu antigo chefe e consegui um acordo para voltar a trabalhar pra ele remotamente, trabalhando de casa. Ele tem uma demanda surreal de trabalho e para poder fazer tudo de casa, aceitei um salário incompatível com a quantidade de trabalho que me dispus a fazer.
Era uma grana até ok, mas os clientes... É uma galera bem rica, que não sabe o que quer mas é cheio de desejos e demandas, sei lá, nunca devem ter ouvido NÃO na vida. Eu sabia que era assim, trabalhei 3 anos pra esse cara anteriormente, mas era o que consegui na época e eu sempre me lembrava que essa dor de cabeça vinha com o bônus de poder estar perto da minha namorada e futuramente acompanhar as primeiras etapas de vida do meu bebê.
Não mencionei isso, mas nunca estudei design gráfico formalmente. Sempre aprendi tudo “na tora”, de acordo com a demanda, fazendo. Sempre estudei em faculdade pública e minha segunda graduação era em Belas Artes. Sempre desenhei e desde 2015 descobri um amor incondicional pelo ato de pintar. Era uma forma de tentar transformar minhas piores experiências em algo palatável, não sei explicar direito. Sei que eu idealizava muito a profissão de artista. Eu era muito cabeça dura e achava que conseguiria entrar no mundo da “alta arte”, estabelecer contatos e viver disso um dia. Mal sabia eu o buraco que estava entrando... Conhecendo as “pessoas certas” vi que os artistas que mais ralavam para projetar seu trabalho, normalmente tinham uma ou mais fontes de renda alternativa. Fossem essas um trabalho formal, CLT, era funcionário público ou simplesmente tinha nascido em berço de ouro. Em família de artistas famosos, galeristas ou colecionadores de arte. Quanto mais eu respirava dessa atmosfera mais eu via que esse ar não era pra mim e esse contato influenciou, durante muito tempo, meu trabalho de forma negativa.
Aceitar esse trabalho significava também ter menos tempo pra minha produção em pintura. Eu via como um passo para trás na minha carreira de pintor e ficava muito puto ao pensar que tudo isso era por conta do vacilo de termos ficados grávidos.
Mas como eu disse lá em cima, eu tinha essa clareza de que eu seria o pai que eu não tive e o companheiro para minha namorada que minha mãe não teve. Então agarrei essa oportunidade com unhas e dentes. Rescindi meu contrato de locação e fui morar com minha namorada, que tinha o apartamento maior. Passamos a dividir tudo e conviver intensamente. Nos primeiros 2 meses de gravidez os exames de ultrassom apontavam para uma gravidez gemelar, ou seja, eram 2 sacos gestacionais. Ficamos super tensos. Não queríamos ser pais de um, imagina de dois.
No terceiro mês fizemos um exame que mostrou que só um dos sacos se desenvolveu e vimos também que seríamos pais de um menino. Descobrir isso foi um passeio nas nuvens... a partir daí fomos nos adaptando um a rotina do outro. Ela foi aos poucos cedendo seu espaço para eu entrar de fato na vida dela, e eu, sem querer chegar tomando um espaço que sempre foi dela, fui aos poucos me aconchegando nessa casa nova.
Demorou muito pra eu começar a ver minha namorada como família. A gente sabia que nosso filho crescia dentro dela mas tudo parecia virtual demais. Ele não tinha voz, peso, cheiro, nada. Nem nome.
A gravidez inteira foi tranquila. Nenhuma grande complicação durante a gestação. Isso nos deu tempo para conseguir juntar uma grana boa para o período do puerpério em que minha namorada não conseguiria mais trabalhar e nossa renda mensal cairia consideravelmente.
Eu conversava com a barriga. Tocava violão, cantava, falava do meu dia pra barriga dela. Fui desenvolvendo uma relação com esse ser imaginário e no fim da gestação eu já sabia que eu queria muito ser pai dessa criança.
Durante a gravidez fiz meu tcc em pintura e o dia de definir minha banca avaliadora se aproximava junto dos prováveis dias que nosso bebê ia nascer. Fiz todas as pinturas que iria mostrar ainda no primeiro semestre, mas comecei a me enrolar com a parte escrita. Trabalho, casa, bebê a caminho, pode escolher qual dos motivos convinha mais para eu não entregar o meu tcc.
Numa quarta feira a noite, minha namorada comecou a sentir contrações e a partir daí começamos a cronometra-las. Estavam espaçados e evoluindo devagar. Ela sentia muita dor e resolvemos ir para o hospital. Lá, descobrimos que é possível um trabalho de parto não evoluir. Ela chegou a 3cm de dilatação e assim ficou. Durante 5 fucking dias. Voltamos pra casa e ela ficava sentindo contrações de uma em uma hora. Íamos no consultório do obstetra todos os dias e nada da dilatação aumentar... estávamos tensos e cansados. No domingo seguinte, nosso médico pediu para que ela fosse internada e o parto induzido.
E as 10:30 da manhã do dia 10 de novembro, eu vi minha jornada épica começar e meu filho, Dante, nascer. Foi o momento mais lindo da minha vida. Nunca vivi nada tão intenso assim antes e ouso dizer que a sensação desnorteante que se sente quando se perde alguém é muito parecida com a sensação de presenciar uma nova vida começar.
Desde esse dia, não consigo tirar o sorriso do rosto. Eu e minha namorada(agora noiva) nunca estivemos tão felizes e conectados, agora com a clareza de que somos mais que companheiros, somos família. Nosso bebê é 100% saudável, muito bonzinho e até deixa a gente dormir! E sei lá, parece que os astros se alinharam, tudo tem dado muito certo pra gente. O parto da minha noiva foi normal e correu melhor do que a regra: não precisou de cortes, logo não precisou de pontos e não houve nenhuma laceração, o que está fazendo ela se recuperar muito melhor do que previmos.
Parei com a maconha desde a segunda metade da gravidez e nunca me vi tão produtivo. A qualidade do meu trabalho como designer aumentou muito e comecei a ter coragem de postar minhas pinturas no meu instagram sem o peso do “tudo ou nada” do artista, sabe? Como eu tenho um emprego que paga minhas contas e minha comida eu não me preocupo mais com essa coisa de ser um artista bem sucedido, eu pinto pelo prazer do fazer e isso tem feito um bem danado pra mim e pras minhas pinturas. Perdi a data de definir minha banca do tcc, ou seja, perdi meu ultimo ano na faculdade, certo? Errado. Minha orientadora me enviou uma mensagem hoje de manha dizendo para eu participar da exposição final das habilitações por que ela vai fazer uma carta oficial pedindo para a reitoria para que eu defenda meu tcc em março do ano que vem! É surreal, mas a vida agora tem outro sentido e tudo tem dado certo, sinto que virei um novo núcleo para minha família e para a família da minha noiva e essa sensação é boa demais!!
Vou me casar com a mãe do meu filho. Olhamos alianças ontem. Almejo agora a migração de área profissional, do design gráfico para UX design para procurar um emprego fichado assim que meu filho começar a frequentar escola/berçário e quero continuar pintando. Quero ensinar o Dante a pintar, tocar instrumentos, quero que estar do lado dele pra ver ele crescer e quero que ele seja muito feliz.
Escrevi demais e sinto que deixei de contar tanta coisa... Pra quem teve paciência de chegar até aqui, eu só agradeço por ler esse desabafo.
TLDR: a vida é muito doida.
submitted by blancyago
to desabafos [link] [comments]
2019.11.20 06:13 RemixBeat Heavy Hits [19-November-2019]
47Ter – Cote Ouest [Dirty] 4B 76 88GLAM FT. Lil Keed – Bankroll [HH Clean Intro] 4A 78 88GLAM FT. Lil Keed – Bankroll [HH Dirty Intro] 4A 78 AJ Tracey & Skepta – Kiss & Tell [HH Dirty Intro] 5A 71 Alicia Keys FT. 21 Savage & Miguel – Show Me Love [HH Clean Intro] 4A 65 Asaf Avidan & The Mojos – One Day [Wankelmut Remix] [Extended Mix] 2A 119 Asaf Avidan & The Mojos – One Day [Wankelmut Remix] [Radio Edit] 2A 119 Azet – Seele [HH Dirty Intro] 9A 102 Baby FT. P. Diddy – Do That.. [CFLO Intro] [Dirty] 3A 102 Baby FT. P. Diddy – Do That.. [Clean] 3A 102 Baby FT. P. Diddy – Do That.. [HH Clean Intro] 3A 102 Baby FT. P. Diddy – Do That.. [HH Clean Short] 3A 102 Baby FT. P. Diddy – Do That.. [Instrumental] 3A 102 Baby Keem – Orange Soda [HH Clean Intro] 11A 85 Baby Keem – Orange Soda [HH Dirty Intro] 11A 85 Banx & Ranx & Kojo Funds – Trac Jam [HH Clean Intro] 4A 107 Bausa – Weiß Noch Nicht Wie [HH Dirty Intro] 1B 76 Bausa – Weiß Noch Nicht Wie [IGORITO Acapella Out] [Dirty] 1B 76 Billie Eilish – Bad Guy [Chris Leed Remix] [HH Clean Short] 6A 125 BRADO & MERO – Kafa Leyla [HH Dirty Intro] 11A 90 Bryan Mg FT. Frenna – My Bebe [HH Dirty Intro] 11A 103 Buju – L’Enu [HH Clean Intro] 12A 113 Busy Signal FT. Afro B – 100% [HH Clean Intro] 6A 97 Cassidy – B-Boy Stance [Acapella] [Dirty] 5A 94 Cassidy – B-Boy Stance [Clean] 5A 94 Cassidy – B-Boy Stance [Dirty] 5A 94 Cassidy – B-Boy Stance [DJ Noise Acapella In] [Dirty Short] 5A 94 Cassidy – B-Boy Stance [DJ Noise Acapella In] [Dirty] 5A 94 Cassidy – B-Boy Stance [DJ Noise Acapella In-Out] [Dirty Short] 5A 94 Cassidy – B-Boy Stance [DJ Noise Acapella In-Out] [Dirty] 5A 94 Cassidy – B-Boy Stance [HH Clean Intro] 5A 94 Cassidy – B-Boy Stance [HH Clean Short] 5A 94 Cassidy – B-Boy Stance [HH Dirty Intro] 5A 94 Cassidy – B-Boy Stance [HH Dirty Short] 5A 94 Cassidy – B-Boy Stance [Instrumental] 5A 94 Chase – Call Me [Dirty] 8B 74 Chase – Call Me [HH Dirty Intro] 8B 74 Chiki El De La Vaina FT. Shadow Blow, Ceky Viciny Bulin 47, Yomel El Meloso & Jey Blessing – La Manilla [Remix] [HH Dirty Intro] 5A 112 Christina Aguilera – Your Body [Acapella] 1A 102 Christina Aguilera – Your Body [Clean] 1A 103 Christina Aguilera – Your Body [HH Clean Intro] 1A 103 Christina Aguilera – Your Body [Martin Garrix Remix] 1A 128 Christina Aguilera FT. Redman – Dirrty [Acapella] 5A 100 Christina Aguilera FT. Redman – Dirrty [CFLO Edit] [Main] 6A 100 Christina Aguilera FT. Redman – Dirrty [Clean] 6A 100 Christina Aguilera FT. Redman – Dirrty [HH Clean Intro] 6A 100 Christopher Cross – Ride Like The Wind [Clean] 5A 125 Claudia Mena – Cositas Malas [HH Clean Intro] 5A 102 Common – Testify [Clean] 12A 87 Common – Testify [Dirty] 12A 87 Common – Testify [HH Clean Intro] 12A 87 Common – Testify [HH Clean Short] 12A 87 Common – Testify [HH Dirty Intro] 12A 87 Common – Testify [HH Dirty Short] 12A 87 Common – Testify [Instrumental] 12A 87 Crazy Design FT. Ceky Viciny & Bulin 47 – El Carton [HH Dirty Intro] 2A 132 Crystal Waters – Gypsy Woman [Acapella] 7A 123 Crystal Waters – Gypsy Woman [Clean] 7A 120 Crystal Waters – Gypsy Woman [Extended Mix] 7A 120 Crystal Waters – Gypsy Woman [HH Clean Intro] 7A 120 Crystal Waters – Gypsy Woman [She’s Homeless – Godlips Remix] [Main] 7A 120 D4L – Lay Tay [DJ Scene Remix] [HH Clean Short] 5A 78 DaDJu – Bobo Au Coeur [Dirty] 7A 98 Damian Twilt & Dylan Dos Santos – Choco [HH Dirty Intro] 9A 115 Dave East FT. Fabolous – What’s Goin On [HH Clean Intro] 5A 97 Dave East FT. Fabolous – What’s Goin On [HH Dirty Intro] 5A 97 Dave East FT. Lil Baby – Night Shift [HH Clean Intro] 8A 70 Dave East FT. Lil Baby – Night Shift [HH Dirty Intro] 8A 70 Dave East FT. Rick Ross & The Dream – Og [HH Clean Intro] 9A 83 Dave East FT. Rick Ross & The Dream – Og [HH Dirty Intro] 9A 83 Dave East FT. Ty Dolla Sign – On Sight [HH Clean Intro] 8A 101 Dave East FT. Ty Dolla Sign – On Sight [HH Dirty Intro] 8A 101 DJ Cruz FT. Rockstar Payso – No Problems [Tom Budin Remix] [HH Dirty Short] 7A 126 DJ Kay Slay FT. A Boogie, Blueface & Moneybagg Yo – Hocus Pocus [HH Clean Intro] 7A 98 DJ Kay Slay FT. A Boogie, Blueface & Moneybagg Yo – Hocus Pocus [HH Dirty Intro] 7A 98 DJ Wale FT. Quincy Promes & KM – Nog Een Trein [Dirty] 2A 96 DJ Wale FT. Valsbezig – Pull Over [Dirty] 9A 95 Doja Cat FT. Gucci Mane – Like That [HH Clean Intro] 10B 106 Doja Cat FT. Gucci Mane – Like That [HH Dirty Intro] 11B 106 Don Omar – Intocable [Acapella] [Dirty] 5A 95 Don’t Look Now – Ammunition [Fort Akansas Remix] [Original Mix] 2A 122 Drake – Fake Love [Double A Club Mix] [Clean] 8A 134 Dramaki & Austin Feldman – Make Em Go [HH Clean Short] 7A 124 El Tonto FT. Lirico En La Casa, El Mayor Clasico, Ceky Viciny, Bulin 47, Mark B & Chimbala – Caliente [Remix] [HH Dirty Intro] 1A 124 EMR3YGUL & Jacksell – Sleep [Original Mix] 4A 110 Fall Out Boy – Bob Dylan [Clean] 11B 100 Fatman Scoop FT. Crooklyn Clan – It Takes Scoop [EwONE! Edit] [Clean Short] 9A 115 Frank Ocean – In My Room [Clean] 10A 79 Frank Ocean – In My Room [HH Clean Intro] 10A 79 Frank Ocean – In My Room [HH Dirty Intro] 10A 79 Freak On – Bounce [HH Clean Short] 8A 126 Godwonder & Miss Baas – Turn Me On [Dopeman Remix] [HH Dirty Intro] 9A 100 Gregor Salto FT. Saxsymbol & Todorov – Samba Do Mundo [Olav Basoski Remix] [Original Mix] 4A 125 Gregor Salto FT. Saxsymbol & Todorov – Samba Do Mundo [Original Mix] 4A 128 Gregor Salto FT. Saxsymbol, Todorov & Fatboy Slim – Samba Do Mundo [Wiwek Remix] [Original Mix] 4A 128 Gwen Stefani – Hollaback Girl [Kees Sjansen Remix] [HH Dirty Short] 2A 110 HoodRich Pablo Juan FT. Gucci Mane & Wiz Khalifa – Iced Up [HH Dirty Intro] 7A 66 Iggy Azalea & Alice Chater – Lola [HH Clean Intro] 4A 71 Iggy Azalea & Alice Chater – Lola [HH Dirty Intro] 4A 71 I-Octane – Suh We Dweet [Power House Riddim] [HH Clean Intro] 5A 98 Isaac Jordan – Andale! [Sample] 7A 1 Isaac Jordan – Put Ya Hands All The Way Up [Acapella Loop] [Clean] 12A 100 Ishawna – Gree Wid You [Power House Riddim] [HH Clean Intro] 5A 98 Ishawna – Gree Wid You [Power House Riddim] [HH Dirty Intro] 5A 98 Iwaata – Bare Face Gyal [Power House Riddim] [HH Clean Intro] 5A 98 Iwaata – Bare Face Gyal [Power House Riddim] [HH Dirty Intro] 5A 98 IZa FT. Ciara & Major Lazer – Evapora [HH Clean Intro] 1A 104 J. Stone FT. Nipsey Hussle, Pacman Da Gunman & Casanova – Nineteen [HH Dirty Intro] 1A 95 Jacquees FT. Future – What They Gone Do With Me [HH Clean Intro] 3A 67 Jacquees FT. Future – What They Gone Do With Me [HH Dirty Intro] 3A 67 Jacquees FT. Lil Keed & Lil Gotit – Hot For Me [HH Clean Intro] 6A 65 Jacquees FT. Lil Keed & Lil Gotit – Hot For Me [HH Dirty Intro] 6A 65 Jacquees FT. Summer Walker – Superstar [HH Clean Intro] 6A 67 Jacquees FT. Summer Walker – Superstar [HH Dirty Intro] 6A 67 Jacquees FT. TK Kravitz – EEeee [HH Clean Intro] 8A 78 Jacquees FT. TK Kravitz – EEeee [HH Dirty Intro] 8A 78 Jacquees FT. Tory Lanez – Risk It All [HH Clean Intro] 11A 95 Jacquees FT. Tory Lanez – Risk It All [HH Dirty Intro] 11A 95 Jahmiel – Trust [Power House Riddim] [Clean] 5A 98 Jala Brat – Patek [HH Dirty Intro] 10A 102 Jay Watts – My Baby [HH Clean Intro] 11A 85 Jay Watts – My Baby [HH Dirty Intro] 11A 85 JetLagBlack – That’s Me [HH Clean Intro] 6A 90 JetLagBlack – That’s Me [HH Dirty Intro] 6A 90 Jey Blessing FT. Rauw Alejandro & Los Fantastikos – Suave [Remix] [HH Clean Intro] 5A 88 Jhene Aiko FT. Big Sean – None Of Your Concern [Clean] 8A 83 Jhene Aiko FT. Big Sean – None Of Your Concern [Dirty] 8A 83 Joeski, Doc Martin & Lillia – Vajra [Original Mix] 4A 125 Joy Division – Love Will Tear Us Apart [Clean] 10B 73 Juanes FT. Crudo – Aurora [HH Clean Intro] 5A 94 Jufu – Who R U [HH Clean Intro] 8A 92 Karol G & Nicki Minaj – Tusa [HH Clean Intro] 10B 101 Karol G & Nicki Minaj – Tusa [HH Dirty Intro] 10B 101 Ketchup – Big Daddy [HH Clean Intro] 1A 101 Kevin O Chris FT. Drake – Ela E Do Tipo [Remix] [HH Clean Intro] 2B 75 Kevin O Chris FT. Drake – Ela E Do Tipo [Remix] [HH Dirty Intro] 2B 75 Khalid – Up All Night [HH Clean Intro] 3A 94 KILLY – Triple Helix [HH Dirty Intro] 5A 65 Krept & Konan FT. D-Block Europe & Ling Hussle – Tell Me [HH Clean Intro] 12A 82 Krept & Konan FT. D-Block Europe & Ling Hussle – Tell Me [HH Dirty Intro] 12A 82 Lali FT. CNCO – Como Asi [Dirty] 7B 86 Len Beam FT. Shure & Spintly & Bay C – POSITION [HH Clean Intro] 9A 100 Lexa FT. Pedro Sampaio – Chama Ela [Dirty] 11A 75 Lil Baby – Woah [HH Clean Intro] 2A 72 Lil Baby – Woah [HH Dirty Intro] 2A 72 Lil Berete FT. Headie One – Money Moves [HH Dirty Intro] 5A 72 Lil Jon FT. Three 6 Maa – Act A Fool [Acapella] [Clean] 4A 75 Lil Jon FT. Three 6 Maa – Act A Fool [Clean] 4A 75 Lil Jon FT. Three 6 Maa – Act A Fool [Dirty] 4A 75 Lil Jon FT. Three 6 Maa – Act A Fool [DJ Noise Acapella In] [Dirty Short] 4A 75 Lil Jon FT. Three 6 Maa – Act A Fool [DJ Noise Acapella In] [Dirty] 4A 75 Lil Jon FT. Three 6 Maa – Act A Fool [DJ Noise Acapella In-Out] [Dirty Short] 4A 75 Lil Jon FT. Three 6 Maa – Act A Fool [DJ Noise Acapella In-Out] [Dirty] 4A 75 Lil Jon FT. Three 6 Maa – Act A Fool [HH Clean Intro] 4A 75 Lil Jon FT. Three 6 Maa – Act A Fool [HH Clean Short] 4A 75 Lil Jon FT. Three 6 Maa – Act A Fool [HH Dirty Intro] 4A 75 Lil Jon FT. Three 6 Maa – Act A Fool [HH Dirty Short] 4A 75 Lil Jon FT. Three 6 Maa – Act A Fool [Instrumental] 4A 75 Lil Mosey FT. Trippie Redd – Never Scared [HH Clean Intro] 8A 74 Lil Mosey FT. Trippie Redd – Never Scared [HH Dirty Intro] 8A 74 Los Angeles Azules, Belinda, Lalo Ebratt FT. Horacio Palencia – Amor A Primera Vista [Clean] 9A 85 Los Angeles Azules, Belinda, Lalo Ebratt FT. Horacio Palencia – Amor A Primera Vista [HH Clean Intro] 8A 85 Major Lazer – Light It Up [Joe Maz Remix] [JM Edit] 8A 108 Major Lazer – Light It Up [Joe Maz Remix] 8A 108 Major Lazer FT. J Balvin & El Alfa – Que Calor [Sunnery James Remix] [HH Clean Intro] 5A 126 Major Lazer FT. J Balvin & El Alfa – Que Calor [Sunnery James Remix] [HH Clean Short] 5A 126 Major Lazer FT. Nyla – Light It Up [Blinkie Remix] 8A 124 Major Lazer FT. Nyla – Light It Up [Dirty] 7A 90 Major Lazer FT. Nyla – Light It Up [Fuse ODG Remix] 8A 108 Major Lazer FT. Nyla – Light It Up [Luzquinos Moombahton Out Edit] [Dirty] 8A 108 Major Lazer FT. Nyla – Light It Up [Remix] [Clean] 8A 108 Major Lazer FT. Nyla – Light It Up [Remix] [HH Clean Intro] 8A 108 Major Lazer FT. Nyla – Light It Up [Remix] [HH Clean Short] 8A 108 Major Lazer FT. Nyla – Light It Up [Remix] [Instrumental] 8A 108 Major Lazer FT. Nyla x Sean Paul – Light It Up [Isaac Jordan Hype Edit] 8A 108 Major Lazer FT. Nyla, Fuse ODG x YP – Light It Up [Isaac Jordan 123-108 Transition] [Clean] 8A 108 Makkie & Rollan – Slim [HH Dirty Intro] 4A 99 MAKVL – Prince [HH Clean Short] 6A 124 Mark Knight – Feel Good Now [Original Mix] 4A 124 Marshall Jeerson & Solardo – Move Your Body [DJ Mighty Hype Intro] [Clean Short] 9A 125 Martin Buttrich – Full Clip [Original Mix] 3A 125 MC Stojan – Sve Zene Vole [Dexxus Redrum] [Dirty] 9A 105 MC Stojan – Sve Zene Vole [Dirty] 9A 105 Melanie – Brand New Key [Isaac Jordan 2013 Remix] [Clean] 3B 93 Menor Menor FT. Akim & Lirico En La Casa – Se Revelo [HH Dirty Intro] 5A 94 Mensa – Voila [HH Dirty Intro] 5A 119 Merdan D FT. Jonna Rincon & Tay – Last [HH Dirty Intro] 6A 96 Miguel – Funeral [HH Dirty Intro] 10B 96 Milky Chance – Stolen Dance [Clean] 1A 114 Milky Chance – Stolen Dance [HH Clean Intro] 1A 114 Milky Chance – Stolen Dance [N2N Remix] [Original Mix] 1A 114 Money Man – Exotic [HH Clean Intro] 12A 60 Money Man – Exotic [HH Dirty Intro] 12A 60 Monty – Mission [HH Clean Intro] 2A 80 Monty – Mission [HH Dirty Intro] 2A 80 Mr Eazi FT. King Promise, emPawa Africa & Joey B – Call Waiting [HH Clean Intro] 12A 102 Muse – Madness [Clean] 6B 90 Muse – Madness [HH Clean Intro] 6B 90 Mystique – Brand New [Radio Edit] 11A 127 N.E.R.D. – She Wants To Move [Clean] 9A 115 N.E.R.D. – She Wants To Move [HH Clean Intro] 4A 115 N.E.R.D. FT. Common, Mos Def, De La Soul & Q-Tip – She Wants To Move [Native Tongues Remix] [Dirty] 9A 115 N.E.R.D. FT. Common, Mos Def, De La Soul & Q-Tip – She Wants To Move [Native Tongues Remix] [HH Dirty Intro] 9A 115 N.E.R.D. FT. Common, Mos Def, De La Soul & Q-Tip – She Wants To Move [Native Tongues Remix] [HH Dirty Short] 9A 115 Nadia Rose FT. WondaGurl – Soul Rich [HH Dirty Intro] 7A 58 Niall Horan & Diplo – Nice To Meet Ya [Diplo Remix] [HH Clean Intro] 9A 125 Niall Horan & Diplo – Nice To Meet Ya [Diplo Remix] [HH Clean Short] 9A 125 Nicky Romero FT. Mike Williams & Amba Shepherd – Dynamite [HH Clean Short] 9A 128 Nio Garcia FT. Rauw Alejandro & Brytiago – Hoy Se Bebe [Remix] [HH Dirty Intro] 8A 94 Nora En Pure – Come With Me [Extended Mix] 11A 120 Nora En Pure – Come With Me [Satin Jacket Sunrise Remix] [Clean] 11A 105 Oualid – Bye Bye [HH Dirty Intro] 11A 95 Papoose – Big Snitch [Big Drip Remix] [HH Clean Intro] 9A 70 Papoose – Big Snitch [Big Drip Remix] [HH Dirty Intro] 9A 70 Pink Sweat$ & Crush – I Wanna Be Yours [HH Dirty Intro] 4B 70 Plies FT. DaBaby – Boss Friends [Clean] 6A 105 Plies FT. DaBaby – Boss Friends [HH Clean Intro] 6A 105 Plies FT. DaBaby – Boss Friends [HH Dirty Intro] 6A 105 Poundz – Opp Thot [HH Dirty Intro] 12A 71 QQ FT. Pataskeng – Touch [HH Clean Intro] 2B 107 QQ FT. Pataskeng – Touch [HH Dirty Intro] 2B 107 Rasta – Mantra [Dexxus Remix] [Dirty] 4A 105 Redman FT. Busta Rhymes – Da Goodness [Clean] 2A 107 Ricii Lompeurs – [I Just] Died In Your Arms [Original Mix] 7A 100 Rod Wave – Sky Priority [HH Dirty Intro] 1B 86 Rod Wave FT. Kevin Gates – Titanic [HH Dirty Intro] 9A 71 Rosalia – A Pale [HH Clean Intro] 6A 123 Saweetie – My Type [DJ OiO OG To Dillon Francis Remix Flip] [Dirty] 6A 105 Saweetie – My Type [Miles Medina Never Too Much Edit] [Dirty] 5A 105 Sch – R.A.C. [Dirty] 5A 70 Secreto El Famoso Biberon – Real Joseador [HH Dirty Intro] 6A 64 Secreto El Famoso Biberon FT. MelyMel – Dame Mi Banda [HH Dirty Intro] 2A 105 Selena Gomez – Lose You To Love Me [HH Clean Intro] 12B 103 Selena Gomez – Lose You To Love Me [HH Clean Short] 12B 103 Selena Gomez – Lose You To Love Me [PeteDown Afrobeat Mix] [Clean Short] 12B 105 Selena Gomez – Lose You To Love Me [PeteDown Afrobeat Mix] [Clean] 12B 105 Serg Sniper – Bathroom Break Vol. 5 [80’s Rock] [Clean] 12B 129 Shakka FT. AlunaGeorge – Man Down [Callum Knight Remix] [HH Clean Short] 5A 125 Shelco Garcia & Teenwolf & Mountblaq & Darren Zagga – Trumpets Go Like [HH Clean Short] 11A 128 Shoreline Maa – Fell In Love [Dirty] 8A 106 Skiibii – Big Engine [HH Clean Intro] 4A 110 Skye FT. XXXtentacion – VOICES [HH Dirty Intro] 8A 69 Smokepurpp – Stevie [HH Dirty Intro] 3A 63 Snoh Aalegra FT. 6LACK – Want You Around [Remix] [HH Dirty Intro] 1B 84 Snoop Dogg – I Wanna Rock [EwONE! Intro-Outro] [Dirty Short] 4A 91 Snoop Dogg – I Wanna Rock [EwONE! Intro-Outro] [Dirty] 4A 91 Snoop Dogg – I Wanna Rock [EwONE! It Takes Two Transition 112-91] [Dirty] 4A 112 Soprano FT. Jul – CabeZa [HH Dirty Intro] 5A 97 Spice – Tables Turn [HH Clean Intro] 7A 94 Squash – Scotch & Soda [HH Dirty Intro] 11B 97 Stevie Wonder – Uptight [Emynd Reggae Blend] [Clean Intro] 3A 76 Tame Impala – It Might Be Time [HH Clean Intro] 10B 116 Taog, 2Scratch & Hustle – Hot [HH Dirty Intro] 10A 85 Teddy Cream – Summer Jam [HH Clean Short] 9A 126 Teejay – Stay Scheemin’ [Power House Riddim] [HH Clean Intro] 5A 98 Teejay – Stay Scheemin’ [Power House Riddim] [HH Dirty Intro] 5A 98 Tensnake – Coma Cat [HH Clean Short] 7A 119 Tensnake – Coma Cat [Original Mix] 7A 119 Tensnake – Coma Cat [Radio Edit] 7A 119 Teyana Taylor & Kehlani – Morning [HH Dirty Intro] 2A 60 The Black Keys – Fever [Clean] 7A 128 The Game FT. Anderson Paak – Stainless [HH Clean Intro] 8A 84 The Game FT. Anderson Paak – Stainless [HH Dirty Intro] 8A 84 The Ivor Raymonde Orchestra – It’s The Real Thing [Double A Quantized Edit] [Clean Short] 8B 90 The Presets – 14U+14ME [What So Not & SLUMBERJACK Reset] [Clean] 6A 75 Timaya – Sili-Kon [HH Clean Intro] 8B 90 Trippie Redd – Love Me More [HH Dirty Intro] 6A 84 Tyga – Ayy Macarena [HH Dirty Intro] 7A 97 Usher – U Remind Me [CFLO Short] [Main] 2A 94 Usher – U Remind Me [Clean] 2A 94 Usher – U Remind Me [Dirty] 2A 94 Usher – U Remind Me [Double A Remix] [Clean] 2B 95 Usher – U Remind Me [HH Clean Intro] 2A 94 Usher – U Remind Me [HH Dirty Intro] 2A 94 Usher – U Remind Me [JEKEY Acapella In Re-Work] [Clean] 2A 94 Usher – U Remind Me [Nathan Jain Remix] [Main] 2A 124 Usher – U Remind Me [Tomcio & CHIMP Remix] [Clean] 2A 102 Usher – U Remind Me [Tomcio & CHIMP Remix] [HH Clean Short] 2A 102 Usher FT. Method Man & Blu Cantrell – U Remind Me [Remix] [Acapella] [Clean] 2A 96 Usher FT. Method Man & Blu Cantrell – U Remind Me [Remix] [Acapella] [Dirty] 2A 96 Usher FT. Method Man & Blu Cantrell – U Remind Me [Remix] [Clean] 2A 96 Usher FT. Method Man & Blu Cantrell – U Remind Me [Remix] [Dirty] 2A 96 Usher FT. Method Man & Blu Cantrell – U Remind Me [Remix] [HH Clean Intro] 2A 96 Usher FT. Method Man & Blu Cantrell – U Remind Me [Remix] [HH Dirty Intro] 2A 96 Vanessa Nice FT. Kuami Eugene – All Night Long [HH Clean Intro] 10A 125 VanJess FT. Ari Lennox – Cool O The Rain [HH Dirty Intro] 10A 86 Villanosam & Vakero – Depresion [HH Dirty Intro] 2A 60 Vybz Kartel & JayCrazie – Long Live Jamaica [HH Clean Intro] 9A 93 Vybz Kartel & JayCrazie – Long Live Jamaica [HH Clean Short] 9A 93 Westside Gunn FT. Fat Joe – Kelly’s Corner [HH Clean Intro] 4B 75 Westside Gunn FT. Fat Joe – Kelly’s Corner [HH Dirty Intro] 4B 75 WSTRN – They Don’t Know [HH Dirty Intro] 4A 74 Y2K & Bbno$ – Lalala [Miami Rockets & Nicola Fasano Remix] [HH Dirty Short] 7A 130 Yungeen Ace FT. Stunna 4 Vegas – Brand New [HH Dirty Intro] 6A 60 Zemyu FT. Kevin Kelly – Giving [HH Clean Short] 5A 126
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2019.10.27 14:19 TessaBissolli Cooper, the key to S7 so far. **** SPOILERS beyond 7.04 ****
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We had a couple of posts about Cooper,, for those who want to explore them: Harold Cooper, Raymond Reddington, Naval Intelligence, and the FBI. What do we know leading up to 7.04?
& Harold Cooper in regards to Liz and her quest
We know a few facts about Harold Cooper: he was US Navy Intelligence. He was part of a team that rescued RR from a torture situation before 1987: "Youngest agent ever appointed to the Pentagon's combined investigation and intelligence task force
He was part of a black op in Kuwait in 1989: DEVRY AS RR: "June 1989, I coordinated Operation Minesweep, which provided back office support and oversight for Naval Intelligence operations in Kuwait carried out by the 160th SOAR. The op was off the books but can be confirmed by Assistant Director Harold Cooper"
. COOPER: "How the hell does he know that?"
That operation was classified.
Some in the subredditt think he is an idiot, easily hoodwinked. I do not. I think he is playing a game of his own.
He asks a question about a Kuwait mission in 7.01 to make sure Red is who he says he is: 30 years ago, Raymond Reddington heard classified testimony in connection with a US. intelligence officer killed in Kuwait What was the soldier's name? Daniel Hutton
. So it is yo
u. Were you expecting someone else? I wasn't sure. Now I am.
In 7.02 he seems to be teasing Liz: Apparently, Reddington died 30 years ago. He rose from the grave once. I'm pretty sure he will again.
and hears her reasons for turning him in and for now accepting him not as her father: When I thought he was my father, I hated him for abandoning me. I thought he shirked responsibility. But now I know he takes it on even when he doesn't have to.
Liz prefers that he is not her father, both because she hated her abandoning her, but also because it made her feel justified in what she did. And that Rassvet story is what had allowed her to accept him again for himself. He is not a bad man who abandoned her and her sister, but a man who decided to protect her.
But at the time he tells Liz that he is bothered that Red is blaming Liz for what happened to her grandfather:
COOPER: Reddington blamed you?
LIZ: He's not wrong.
Of course he is.
None of this would've happened if Ressler and I hadn't started asking a lot of questions he told us not to ask.
You wouldn't have had to ask them if he'd been honest with you, if he'd told you his real identity.
Have you decided whether to tell Main Justice?
But telling them Reddington is really a former KGB agent whose name is Ilya Koslov will cause a firestorm I have no interest in dealing with.
Now, this is not the first time Cooper has seen Liz severely impacted by Red's secrets. Tom died because of the bones quest and Cooper said: Whatever Reddington's hiding, it's time the truth came out.
Liz faked her death, and Agnes almost died. Tom died. Liz put Red on death row, and Cooper had to threaten the President to save him. Red, Ressler, Aram and Liz were almost killed by McMahon and associates. Liz betrayed not just Red, but also the entire task force, which forced Red to plead guilty and accept the death sentence to protect them.
In season 4 Cooper saw Agnes in mortal danger because Liz believed Kirk was her father. There was a paternity test, and then he was not. It was a fake. Cooper got fed up and gave Liz a reliable one, likely, knowing Red had people inside.
I'm angry that you still don't know why Reddington walked into your life. ... And I should've done it the day he surrendered. I submitted the sample and your profile to a private lab. They'll have the results within 24 hours, so you'll finally know whether or not Raymond Reddington is your father.
Cooper is fed up with the secrets and the lies. More than anything, he is fed up with playing with half the cards. Up until now, he had been sustained by a belief that they were doing good by catching bad people. But the cost is increasingly increasing. The next time the task force comes under fire, they may not be so lucky.
See, this is why I don't play well with partners. Don't fret, Harold. I'm holding all the trumps. I'll be the declarer, you be the dummy, and we'll win the hand.
So, I think this is less about believing the story than about his belief that the secrets's price is going to be paid in more blood. And this time it would be one of his own.
That to me makes more sense than Cooper believing the story that Ressler has a hard time believing. A story that he can easily corroborate, or dismiss. Maybe not about who Red was before he became Reddington, but certainly about being the same man he met before 1987. Possibly even before Liz was born.
REMEMBER, Red may have had another identity before becoming Reddington for the first time, but that does not mean he took it first in 1991. It would be easy to dig into who RR was before he appeared on the US Navy radar, and find nothing. Finding out that RR did not exist, something that has happened in the show before.
We already have been told that Liz could not find her paternal grandfather, which means she had been trying to find relatives of Raymond Reddington other than her sister Jennifer and came up empty:
RESSLER: I don't know who he was, but I think I found someone who might. Your grandfather.
LIZ: You found Reddington's father?
So Cooper may have done the same: look for traces of a life before RR went in the US Navy, and found none. So he knows Redddington is an identity, not who Red really is. And he is fed up. He has known that they do good, and he may have affection for the man, but he is not blind to the danger he brings with the secrets: "Can I tell you something about Reddington? I hate working with the man. He's dangerous, amoral. He pathologically flaunts authority. He's reckless to the point of suicidal. But all this, everything we've done-- none of this would have been possible if it weren't for him."
Since then his posture had softened. They had become friends, allies. Red saved him, he saved Red, but he also has seen Liz unraveling, even if of her own making. BUT for this part, let us assume that Red is indeed Ilya Koslov
, and that he assumed the identity of Raymond Reddington in 1992, after year of surgeries that started in October of 1991, to get 40 million in banks that RR did not know he had because he never opened the accounts, and which the KGB forgot to get out, once he was supposed to have disappeared in December of 1990, a stunt they obviously believed was a ploy because they were happy to believe RR was who ordered the Kursk bombing in 1991, so the Russians did not believe that the US believed RR was a traitor.
So, here is Harold Cooper telling Red that he knows Red is Koslov. Red was fully expecting it, knowing Liz is a first class blabber:
Ah! So Elizabeth finally told you. She took longer than I thought she would. Once word was out, I figured I was on borrowed time. And I'm sure, knowing you as I do, that you'll feel an obligation to report this to the powers that be.
At that point, and IF Red had planned the whole Hutton deal to silence Harold, why wait that long? Why not do this as soon as Liz confronted him about Koslov? Why go the lengths of going to Paris to warn this woman, but not take care of this business that can seriously impact him. Cooper was not planning on letting Red know before contacting Panabaker.
But, there they are there, on the plane, and Cooper confronts him. What was the big deal to say, "yeah, and?" Why all the footsie of" I know because I know, because whoever I was before I am and continue to be Raymond Reddington
" that goes with "I am what I am, Popeye the sailor man
If he is going to basically manipulate Cooper into staying quiet, why spent all that denial time? Unless what Red is saying in all the non-denial denial is that he is who he is, even if he was someone else before.
RED: I know because I know. Because whoever I once was, I am now and will continue to be Raymond Reddington.
RED: I don't live a lie. I may once have had another identity, but that identity no longer exists*. I am exactly who I am. And I can assure you, I'm a far more interesting Raymond Reddington than Raymond Reddington ever was.
COOPER: And what about Ilya Koslov?
RED: I've always believed who you are should define you, not who you were.
and to Liz, when asked why he stayed Raymond Reddington after getting the money: I am what I am. Popeye the Sailor Man.
note the way he is referring to this: I may once have had another identity
, but that identity no longer exists,
instead of "I may once have been someone else." He is talking about identities, not who he is. Like he talks about "Katarina Rostova" to Liz, about the identity, not like he talks about Katarina, the woman, to Dom, the stranger, Constantin, Dembe, and Kate. Reminded me of
Carla Reddington was a miserable housewife married to a miserable man. That woman no longer exists.
You don't believe Raymond Reddington could cease to exist in 60 seconds? I offer that particular package to clients.
Turns out Jolene Parker doesn't exist. It's an alias.
Your husband never existed, Lizzy.
Tom Keen, the man I married, he was a fiction. He didn't exist.
Amber Deveraux doesn't exist.
There is no DOD employee named John Reese not in DSS, not in any sector.... Thought it might be an alias, but it's not. He doesn't exist.
What would you do if you knew knew that as long as you drew breath, as long as you continued to exist, her life would be in danger?
Because he doesn't exist*. Legate is* an elaborate fiction*, a bogeyman I created.*
[Tobias Reuther} doesn't exist. The Agency has no record of him.
He's he right age, and before 2010, - he was non-existent....Because he was someone else. Gerald Todd Klepper
Because that one person doesn't exist before buying a ticket for that ferry. Everything about her credit rating, social security, mortgage payments it exists only after she bought that ticket, not before.
and of course the pivotal:
knowing his identity would put you in grave danger.... I did it to keep you from learning the name of your real father, to protect you. And you must understand-- having done that, I'm certainly not going to tell you who he was now.
So let is examine what we know and see if there any merit to
- Cooper believing Red is a KGB agent named Ilya Koslov, and
- Cooper believing so without any confirmation of it, just on Liz's word, who seems so
stable and trustworthy.
Cooper has access to the DNA that will tell him if Red is RR or an unknown Ilya Koslov
Cooper has access to DNA from the man he rescued before 1987, that DNA had to conform to the rules of evidence, that is was known to be of the man known to the US Navy as Raymond Reddington, that the blood was his, and his only. He has access to the paternity test he ordered, so he does not even need to go back to the evidence locker.
The FBI has samples of this Red, even if they would have kept it to themselves, just for ID purposes. entering DNA into CODIS would be proof that Reddington is an informant. Also it has to conform to CODIS rules: being convicted of a crime, or being a relative of a missing person.
Once he was a convicted criminal in season 6, his DNA entered CODIS. And Liz's DNA is available. He could run test between any of those and get his clear answer.
So, to recap:
Cooper could easily corroborate this cockamamie story by comparing prints and comparing DNA. That would at least tell him that Red is or is not the same man he rescued before 1987. Or do a paternity test between Liz and Red.
- DNA from the man known to the US Navy as Raymond Reddington before 1987 [the one used by him for Liz's paternity test in 4.22]
- DNA from Red once he was convicted of a crime in season 6. plus whatever the task Force kept for their own knowledge, without sharing it with the rest of the FBI. Remember that all about the task force is classified: "How 'bout SCI7? You ever hear of that? ...Well, apparently, it's a designation that the Bureau reserves for certain high profile cases. It's classified, so I can't look at the files or interview the great American heroes of law enforcement that are doing such important work." Even the task force personnel files on the task force stop in 2013. After that they are classified.
- DNA from Liz Keen.
Another issue is that in the prison his identity would have been verified a second time against fingerprints.
And IF there had been a sample of RR's DNA in CODIS, as some people still think there was, magically appeared, would that not have been a hoot? He could not be then convicted of treason because he was not the RR of 1990, thus, that would have never happened, as Ressler notes it makes no sense.
Which takes us to that pivotal and rather iffy identification of the bones as the remains of RR
But there was NO DNA of RR in CODIS. He was identified by fingerprints:
COPPER:We confirm it's actually him?
RESSLER: It's him all right. Prints match. Tattoos.
LIZ: Who is this guy? He claims he's Reddington?
SAMAR: Yes, and we can't disprove it with DNA because there's nothing on file from 1990 when Reddington disappeared.
So, exactly how were those bones identified as RR's?:
One way is that they were done by a familial comparison, as the Cyprus Agency told us, which would merely mean that the remains were of Jennifer's biological father.
Or that along the way, Jennifer changed the results
, wanting to use her sister to get back at her father. A small proof of this is that Ross, who thought RR was who provided him with a defective plane blueprints, was happy to take his revenge on Red.
For 30 years, I've wanted to be in the same room as Raymond Reddington, the bastard who tricked me into selling the Chinese a dodo bird when they were looking for an eagle. And here we are.
If Red was the one who gave them to him or not, is irrelevant, as someone in the US Navy could have used his name to do so. Or Reddington had a dopplegager to be able to sneak out and run field operations.
So, what is Cooper doing in 7.04?
So, two possible answers: One is that Cooper compared them, and is running some test of his own, or is sick of the lies and subterfuges. The second is that he decided to USE this to have something HE can hold over Red's head. A leash.
I can see no merit that Cooper will not verify this story with facts. Who in their right mind would believe a story like Rassvet? Ressler just seems to doubt the whole thing, and he promised Red to keep it to himself.
We know Cooper had got frustrated with Red, however much he may care for him. He has to be seriously concerned with Liz, who betrayed them all, and who exposed a confidential CI, and in the process. Liz is showing that however brilliant she can be in some matters, she is also completely irrational and impulsive, and quite dangerous, and we have seen Cooper pushing Liz to take time off.
RR coordinated operation Minesweep
June 1989, I coordinated Operation Minesweep, which provided back office support and oversight for Naval Intelligence operations in Kuwait carried out by the 160th SOAR. The op was off the books but can be confirmed by Assistant Director Harold Cooper.
So, Minesweep was a black ops conducted with Naval Intelligence. Some players in this black op had a secondary objective: providing money to Kurd rebels. Cooper's direct superior had knowledge of it. Cooper had knowledge of it. Cooper talks about his knowing it was illegal. But what about RR, whose operation it was?
BUT in 1989 Cooper was already assigned to the combined Pentagon intelligence force.
So, in that operation, a Naval intelligence operation, Cooper was Minesweeper One. He and his commanding officer know they are providing money to the Kurds, this might be directive that is coming from higher up, one in which RR is involved.
Cooper said it was illegal, but was it? And if it is, consider for example Esteban:
RED: Of course you do, Harold. Esteban. He works for your government. Castro took him in, and the CIA immediately put him on the payroll as a double agent. What little you know about the inner workings of the Cuban government is courtesy of Manuel Esteban. The CIA knows where to find him, and he knows where to find Elizabeth.
PANABAKER ABOUT ESTEBAN: Good Lord. Is there anything that man doesn't know?... The Agency reaches out to him through the State Department's weekly travel advisory. Set a meeting, a message is encoded in the advisory, detailing where and when.
PANABAKER ABOUT RESSLER NTOFYING THE CUBANS: You told them he worked for us? Do you have any idea what kind of blowback I'm dealing with here? And it doesn't take long to find out who told the Cubans.... Agent Ressler Are you a traitor or-- or just a moron?
PANABAKER ABOUT REDDINGTON: We knew this was a possibility when we made his deal. Which is why the government lawyers who papered it were very clear about what our position would be if it did. In the event of Reddington's arrest, we disavow. We papered it five years ago.... Harold, I like you, and I admire the way you have milked this mad cow, but you knew from day one that the government would never publicly acknowledge having an immunity agreement with the number-one man on its most-wanted list.
PANABAKER ABOUT MOSADEK: Whether Zarak Mosadek was in the employ of the CIA, I am not going to non-deny deny. What I will not deny is that he is no longer in their employ if he ever was, which I will not confirm. Or deny.
REVEN WRIGHT ABOUT THE INEXISTENT AGENT SALERNO: There is no such person. The bureau uses Monarch to finance sanctioned operations, including this one.... You will purge all records of his role in this matter.
RESSLER ABOUT RED: He even volunteered classified details about a Brussels mission in '08. COOPER: What happened in Brussels? - RESSLER: Sir? We tried to kill him, sir.
So, Cooper feels guilty because he did not go back to investigate further if Hutton was alive. That is understandable, but in reality, Cooper did what he was told, following the directives of Raymond Reddington, who coordinated Minesweep.
So, I think we cannot say that the show has not established that black ops exist, and the orders come from high up. Illegal or not, is not the point, the point is Cooper was part of a combined Pentagon unit, and whoever was doing the money infusion, was likely doing so on orders too.
Likely from RR himself.
Connection between "Katerina" and Hutton
So, in 7.01 Cooper decides to check if Red is the Raymond Reddington he knows, and he asks Red the questions which answer is Daniel Hutton. Fakerina has that information. She had no clue who Cooper was, but it is not log before
In 7.04 Daniel Hutton resurfaces, and he wants Cooper. The end result is that Cooper ends up prisoner, and Red gets him out.
This woman uses a method of money transferring predominant in the Middle East, North Africa and India. She likely either sold Cooper to Hutton to pay her debt to The Illusionist, or told Hutton how to find Cooper to isolate Red.
I'll talk to my halawadar. The balance due will be paid by this time tomorrow.
So, either she got Hutton to come for Cooper, in order to find out the relationship between Cooper and Red, or to sideline Red, or Red did, in order to come to the rescue and get Cooper in his debt again.
I feel Fakerina is a likelier option, because of timing. Red could have done so earlier, because he knew Liz was a blabber, while this happened only a bit after Cooper talks about Hutton in a call overseen by "Katarina".
Finally, it is time to chose sides because they cannot co-exist. A third alternative is not to believe either: It is Rassvet AKA Red-is-Ilya OR this woman is Katarina OR Red is RR and this woman is not Liz's mother.
This woman wants Ilya Koslov, so it means she knows or believes Red is RR. IF Rassvet had been true: Ilya became RR and this woman is Liz's mother, then she would know Ilya is now Red.
As to a directive which is a standing bounty for killing Katarina Rostova, this woman wants to save herself by giving them what they want: Katarina Rostova.
So, either she is Katarina's mother and Red is RR, or Red is Ilya and this woman is not Liz's mother, or neither is true: Red is RR and this woman is not Liz's mother.
Since outside of interviews there is no canon in the show that Red is not RR (the DNA test is iffy as I showed above), only that RR was not Red's original identity, but nothing about when he took the identity: in 1991, or way before, when he enter the US Naval Academy, it is likely for me that Red is the man known to the US Navy as RR.
This woman did not know the location of Dom's house, a house that is featured in a child drawing that might be Katarina's or Liz's, https://preview.redd.it/6ddpiq4q6zu31.png?width=641&format=png&auto=webp&s=a22f4b4ca705a5e7b64e3bc22ee24ac09183ee51
Even though Katarina got the PO box in Wilmington, NY, a town near the Vermont border surrender by woods. [remember that the Rassvet tale took 30 minutes once they left Dom's house until we got to the PO Box Elite], so that Dom's house is within 30 minutes driving time from there. Roughly 25 miles away. the star marks the approximate location of Wilmington, NY
Not to mention Dom said he forgave Katarina, but tried to kill Fakerina, who told Red that: "Dom promised me no one would get hurt. Said he loved his child and just wanted her to be safe."
So, it would seem that those post-drowning sightings of Katarina may not have been Katarina, but this woman creating a trail leading away from whatever happened to Katarina, whatever her plan to disappear really was. Likely "killing" the identity, and becoming someone else.
All this points out to Red being RR and this woman not being Katarina, but wanting to find Katarina, which begs the question:
Why is Red going along with the Ilya Koslov identity thing and using words to mask, instead of revealing who he is and who he is not?
Instead of telling Harold in plain English that he is the same Reddington he knew in 1989, and before 1987, likely a lot longer than that? Why all the subterfuges:
I know because I know. Because whoever I once was, I am now and will continue to be Raymond Reddington.
I don't live a lie. I may once have had another identity, but that identity no longer exists. I am exactly who I am.
I am what I am. Popeye the Sailor Man.
Because whoever Ilya Koslov is or was, or one of the men using the identity, may be a direct link to Katarina, just like Fakerina said:
Second photo. Top of the page. Ilya Koslov.... The one person who can tell me what I need to know.
and I think this man might "the Stranger" that Red met in the bench by the Long Island Sound, a man who has known Red since they were children. Is the stranger Ilya?
Katarina knows Liz is the daughter of Raymond Reddington and Katarina Rostova.
so, who was she? Is she also a Rostov? Is she the "Katrina" in this promo picture of Liz's notebook: Where did Liz get a picture of the character we met in Rassvet as Ilya Koslov, a man who looks like a young stranger? Note Ilya is not identified, so, it means she already knew the face as that of Ilya Koslov https://preview.redd.it/wrkporwq23v31.png?width=384&format=png&auto=webp&s=c8d8f2132e9e2135895c3c5f291ff3c07d36abf4
what happened in Belgrade? Who was she before that she knows this information?
Edited for format and missing word, and for missing quotes.